Wonkette

• Pictures of hot Israeli women in IDF uniforms. [IMAO]
• Lindsay Lohan wants to go to Iraq, will take shooting lessons. Think Progress commenter asks: “Who is Lindsay Lohan?” [Think Progress]
• AOL user search data includes: “how to kill your wife” “wife killer” “how to kill a wife” “poop.” [Hit&Run]
• Glenn Reynolds celebrates 5 years with himself. Traditional gifts include wood or clocks. [Instapundit]

• Think Progress posts line from today’s NYT: “In the past two weeks, more Iraqi civilians have been killed than have died in Lebanon and Israel.” Commenter quotes Jeane Kirkpatrick from 1979: “Vietnam presumably taught us that the United States could not serve as the world’s policeman; it should also have taught us the dangers of trying to be the world’s midwife to democracy when the birth is scheduled to take place under conditions of guerrilla war.” [Think Progress]

• Eschaton really hates Lieberman a lot. [Eschaton]
• Psalm 83: “They say, ‘Come, let us wipe out their nation; let Israel’s name be mentioned no more!’” [The Jawa Report]
• Glenn Reynolds: “DIPLOMACY is the art of saying ‘nice doggie’ while reaching for a stick.’ Condi is saying ‘nice doggie.’ Israel is the stick. One may disapprove of this strategy, but complaints that Condi isn’t accomplishing anything merely indicate that the complainer doesn’t know what’s going on.” [Instapundit]
• Miss Indonesia targeted by jihadis in her home country for insulting Indonesian “dignity and women.” She may face jail time. Commenter says: “Leftist Feminists, of course, would agree with the militant Muslims in this case.” [Dhimmi Watch]

Another Wednesday, another installment of our very favorite regular blog feature, “What As Andy Thinking.” Here, courtesy CBS, the topics of some of Andy Rooney’s 60 Minutes editorials in 2003: MORE »

* Jay Tea urges L.A. protesters to refrain from threat-making; real Americans don’t take kindly to it. The blogger compares “immigration advocates” to Seine-side haute protesters, concluding that each group is making unreasonable demands on their respective “system[s].” [Wizbang]
* Michelle Malkin characterizes attendants of the L.A. rally as “divisive militants” and reminds you that their sympathizers lurk in the mainstream. [Michelle Malkin]
* Don Surber believes this is a problem for California — not Bush — to solve. Federal resources remain “better invested” in an undisclosed “elsewhere.” [Don Surber]
* Glenn Reynolds considers the fates of political parties amidst the “backlash” of the protest march. [InstaPundit]
* Mickey Kaus posits immigration, ripe for GOP finesse, as the hot button issue in the midterm elections. Here’s how Republican candidates can play it, with minimal party damage incurred. [Slate]

Last night, the Wonkettes left their respective apartments and headed out into the real world, to attend an exciting event at the National Press Club. The event, “An Army of Davids or the Triumph of Goliath?”, was pitched as “a no-holds-barred debate” between these three giants: Glenn Reynolds, the Instapundit himself, and author of the just-published An Army of Davids; Joe Trippi, former campaign manager for Howard Dean, and author of The Revolution Will Not Be Televised; and Barry C. Lynn, senior fellow at the New American Foundation, and author of End of the Line. (They are pictured above, from left to right: Lynn, Trippi, Reynolds, and moderator Nick Gillespie, editor-in-chief of Reason.)

After the jump, our comprehensive coverage — plus more fantastic photos, taken by Wonkette shutterbug Liz Gorman, Intrepid Girl Reporter. Enjoy!

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Last week, from Thursday, February 9, through Saturday, February 11, conservative political activists from around the country descended upon Washington for the annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC). And the Wonkette Welcome Wagon was there to meet them!

Okay, we kinda missed all of the panels, speeches, and events. We didn’t get to hear Ann Coulter rail against “ragheads,” and we missed the mob-scene book signings by blogebrities Glenn Reynolds and Michelle Malkin. Nor did we attend the remarks of self-professed ex-gay Alan Chambers, who said sodomy was like fast food: “It will kill you.” Uh, not if you don’t swallow!

(Remember, boys and girls: as former President Clinton can tell you, the legal definition of sodomy encompasses a wide range of sexual acts. Black’s Law Dictionary defines sodomy as “oral or anal copulation between humans, or between humans and animals.” In other words, it’s not just assfucking!)

We don’t look that drunk, do we? (Photo by the Boi From Troy, blogging at our too-cool-for-school sibling.)

Sorry for that scholarly digression. Although we missed CPAC’s substantive presentations — if Ann Coulter mocking John Kerry as the other “dominant woman in American politics” qualifies as “substantive” — we did show up for the most important part: the drinking!

A chronicle of our misadventures, after the jump.

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