Glenn Beck’s wingnut bitch, Doug Hoffman, the Conservative Party’s losing candidate in the NY-23 special election several weeks ago (remember that whole thing??), is so clueless about his current station in life that he has “unconceded” defeat to Democrat Bill Owens, who was sworn into the House on November 6 — just in time for a health care vote! He was losing by 5,000 until some late ballots were counted a few days ago, which brought the margin down to about 3,000. And yeah, sure, maybe Al Gore famously unconceded to George Bush Junior in 2000, BUT LIKE AN HOUR AFTER CONCEDING, JESUS. About 10,000 absentee ballots remain, and Hoffman has like a 0.2% chance of winning. It was Glenn Beck who ordered him to unconcede, which makes sense, because Doug Hoffman is Glenn Beck’s wingnut bitch. [The Hill]

“Faceless pundits talks around the issues, not about them…celebrity gossip passes as breaking news…and the liberal bias spewed by the mainstream media makes them like less like a public service and more like an extension of the White House Press Office.” Dates in Westbury, NY and Tampa are already sold out! People do not hesitates or you will has no choice but to listen to your faceless pundits talks around the issues. [Bold & Fresh Tour 2010]

Watch combative, raisin-shaped philosopher-king Rupert Murdoch beg for attention: “[the following was said in an Australian accent, which, according to the Chicago Manual of Style, should be indicated using the 'underline' option]: mumble mumble aye oy yes Glenn Beck was riiiight to call Obama a raycist b’cause sum of the comments Obama mayde were raycist mumble blacks and whites and reds and yellows even though he sayd he wasn’t a raycist.” Yeah it does sound a bit Irish—Wordpress! Anyway the White House will continue to ignore this because there is negative zero reason to do otherwise. [Media Matters]

Yes here it is, the comical Jon Stewart video from your Daily Show. It’s the “Glenn Beck impression” one and the blogs just love it. [Daily Show]

• Erick Erickson harvested a mighty army of orcs and then instructed them to purchase 1200 pounds of rock salt as a special present for traitorous Maine-witch Olympia Snowe. But will Senator Snowe take the hint and melt? [RedState]
• The Republican Insurgency Manifesto. [Ace of Spades]
• How easy would it be to bribe Glenn Beck? David Frum would be willing to offer him fifty Sacajawea gold coins and a hand job, but there’s a catch! [The Plank]
• Yes sir, this is our “volunteer army.” [Think Progress]
• Senator Iselin and Gateway Pundit have compiled a list of the names of 207 persons who are known by the Secretary of Defense as being members of the Communist Party! [Gateway Pundit]

Absolutely hysterical right-wing war newsletter Newsmax, which recently opined that a military junta should overthrow the executive branch of the United States Government, because of “spending,” is now very seriously concerned about Barack Obama “declaring war on Fox News.” MORE »

• “To be clear, I root for America, therefore I root against Barack Obama.” Finally! The RedState dogma explained in one convenient sentence. [RedState]
• Everything that Glenn Beck says hates him. [Think Progress]
• Karl Rove acknowledges that he has reoccurring wet dreams about Marco Rubio, and that if he could, he would dip Marco in chocolate and then gobble him up. [TPM]
• Here is a truly shocking video of Andrew Sullivan sipping Merlot and smelling tulips whilst lounging in his finest Brooks Brothers cashmere sport coat and blabbering on about how much he loves the Queen. And he accuses Barack Obama of being a Tory? Good heavens. [The Daily Dish]
• It is true that Michelle Malkin is a bit of a “surfboard.” But now we have even more proof that Michelle is actually just Matt Taibbi in drag. [Michelle Malkin]

• One hundred years from now, school children will marvel at how obtuse Americans in 2009 really were. “How could they not have known Barack Obama was a Reptilian Shapeshifter?” the children will ask. And then their civics teacher Mr. Floyd will chuckle and reply, “They were very stupid. Very very stupid.” [True/Slant: Harmon Leon]
• Meanwhile, Michelle Obama goes on Sesame Street. But does she compose an awesome song about geometry, just like Philip Glass did? [The Caucus]
• Glenn Beck is the loneliest man on the earth. [Think Progress]
• Is it at all surprising that Creigh Deeds loves taxes more than he loves his children, but also hates Democracy with all his heart? No. No, it is not. [RedState]
• There is serious money to be made disrespecting Republicans. Just ask Alan Grayson, who is now officially rich. [TPM]

Maybe.

Who cares about anything Fox News actor Glenn Beck says or does about anything — he’s really not worth getting so worked up about on a daily basis, tipsters! — and god knows why Katie Couric is interviewing him… but this is a pretty funny three minutes of television. Katie asks, “what do you mean by ‘white culture,’” because apparently Glenn Beck said something about “white culture” recently on his stupid meaningless show that no one should watch or care about in any way, and Glenn Beck just gives her weird sly looks and says, uh, he will not help her? With her show? Anyway, Glenn Beck! He’s so wacky! BUT IS HE BAD FOR AMERICA?? [Think Progress]

Oh… god. Apparently someone taught Glenn Beck a metaphor, and already, there has been one known death. You see, Obama, he’s like throwing frogs in a pot of boiling water. This part of the metaphor stands in for Health Care. You dig? But John McCain, a completely random human who actually has had very little to do with the public health care debate, would never do something so gay, ever, as to force America to eat some pondwater consommé. John McCain HATES the French delicacy of Gay Soup. No, he would put the frog in regular water and slowly bring it to a boil. This part of the metaphor also represents Health Care. Ha, it is confusing! Let’s actually boil something alive, for clarity. MORE »