• GEORGETOWN SOPHOMORE LOOKING FOR ASSISTANT: This sophomore also works in the financial services industry! So of course: “PA example tasks -Organize closet -make bed -Drop off / pick up dry cleaning -Drop me off / pick me up from work -Do laundry -Fill up gas tank -bring car for servicing -schedule appointment for haircut -Pay parking tickets -manage electronic accounts -shopping and running errands -other random tasks. …laundry will be counted for half an hour even though a laundry cycle takes 1.5 hrs to complete.” The Great Recession changed everything. [Georgetown Voice]

It was pretty useless and unnecessary for Barack Obama to go out of his way to give a major economics speech at one of Georgetown’s most haunting, gilded Jesus chambers on Tuesday and request that all symbols there be boarded up; because except for a few libtards, who cares if the three letters, “IHS,” are written on some wall. THEN AGAIN maybe he had those letters covered for the express purpose of watching National Review’s Kathryn Jean “Jonah Goldberg” Lopez flip out, which she did, providing ample entertainment for the American Internet during these tough economic times. So thank you for that, President Abortionist! MORE »

Never has plain old bread and a cup of joe tasted so good. No wonder Le Pain Quotidien is so popular — the food is simple and delicious enough to stand on its own. And usually, your Wonkette doesn’t buy the whole organic hoo-ha, but LPQ really makes it work. [This is the last review from our Malaka Gharib! Wish her luck with her new "real" job. -- Ed.] MORE »

The “much hyped” television show Blonde Charity Mafia, which will be like The Hills but about rich Georgetown socialites on Late Night Shots, will air this summer on the CW network. This needs to be liveblogged every week as part of Wonkette Summer Sweeps. Specifically we need to get Editor Ken in one of his “moods” and have him liveblog it. [WP/Reliable Source]

In a startling case of life imitating Blingee, several characters marched straight out of Wonkette’s most recent photo contest and onto the streets of Georgetown last night. The fully furred Chewbacca and, uh, we actually aren’t sure what that other one is, explained to your intern that they were dressed up for a birthday party. MORE »

Late Night Shots, the exclusive invitation-only social networking club for young Confederate boys and the girls they photograph urinating, in Georgetown, will now expand. In Georgetown. LNS founder Reed Landry is pairing up with some law school student named “Fritz Brogan” (who is rich and friends with Jeb Bush) to launch a new alcohol establishment at 3277 M Street. It will literally be called “The Country Club,” according to this pink blog. “Country Club will not have a sign on the door. While Landry handled the interior design, Brogan insists it will have his signature ’sweaty dance floor.’” [Ask Miss A]

Here is an image of the much-anticipated explosion on the Potomac River today that was filmed for some new teevee pilot. It was still confusing to D.C. residents even though they had been alerted beforehand, because why the fuck is a rowboat being blown up? Should be a real winner of a show, although Obama will probably just preempt it every night to read more lies off of his Tellyprompter. [Flickr]

Ching Ching Cha is a delightful little restaurant that provides several things rarely found in tandem in Georgetown: cheap food, healthy food, and peace and quiet.  Oh yes, and it also has loose leaf tea by the elephant ton. MORE »

Georgetown — home of the cocktail-party-lovin’ metro-hatin’ DC elite — is not the easiest neighborhood in which to relax. But Pizzeria Paradiso, winner of a gajillion best-of-DC awards, is a refuge. MORE »

A full two thirds of the most recent Georgetown University Public Safety Reports have involved an unknown male entering someone’s home and hovering in or around the resident’s bed until being “asked” to leave. MORE »

Oh boy howdy here’s a winner of a party from our special friends at Late Night Shots, the exclusive invite-only social networking club for glib Georgetown trust-funders whose hearts belong to the Confederacy. The members were recently inspired by the playful cultural activities of the slaves on their plantations, and they’ve decided to throw an ironic version for themselves! HA HA HA, see it’s an AWESOME and hilarious idea for a party, because they’re pretending to be like black people!!