Jenna and Henry are really married! But the very private 92-degrees-outside Texas wedding at the livestock pond at least offered George W. Bush another chance to do something embarrassing on the dance floor. Guess what song Jenna and Daddy chose for their special dance? Creepy yacht-rock fuck ballad "You Are So Beautiful," that's what. Let's cringe together, after the jump.
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Finally, George and Laura have almost married off one of the First Twins! It only took eight years, but Jenna found a "taker" and she's getting hitched tomorrow at her parents' fake "ranch" in Crawford, which sounds only a little better than "Waco," and it's time to celebrate the occasion with a bunch of bullshit trivia, after the jump.
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We are only two days away from The Wedding, and there are simply too many questions remaining! Will Jenna run off at the altar, like Julia Roberts does in all those movies? How hot will Lauren be dressed? Which pizza chains will whore themselves out shamelessly in a losing attempt to cater the reception? Oh look, we already know the answer to that last one!
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From showbiz magazine Entertainment Weekly, here is an actor named "Josh Brolin" just after he got the sad news that he has to play the "Will Farrell" character in Oliver Stone's new movie about the George W. Bush Jr. assassination cover-up. [EW]
For some reason, Laura Bush decided to be president today and gave a press conference attacking the Burmese government for the way it handled the cyclone that has killed upwards of 10,000 citizens. Laura Bush said, "Although they were aware of the threat, Burma's state-run media failed to issue a timely warning to citizens in the storm's path." How would the Bush administration have handled a large natural disaster, however?
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Arianna Huffington says John McCain told her he didn't vote for George W. Bush in 2000, and she thinks this is some indication of "how far he's fallen." It could be that, or it could be that George W. Bush had ruined his chance at the presidency by racially smearing his young daughter only months earlier. [HuffPo]
A new CNN poll finds President George W. Bush Jr.'s disapproval rating at 71%. Three cheers and a free bag of Cheetos for our best hated overlord! To put that in perspective: President Nixon's disapproval rating was 67% just before he resigned in 1974; Harry S. Truman's was 66% in January, 1952, after he started a new war and let black and white people fight together in it! Can you imagine? [CNN]
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