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Tag: george orwell

Idaho Wingnut Rep Punished For Being Too Awesome, Also Maybe Psycho

Idaho rightwingers are a special kind of crazy.
Thou hast in thy skull no more brain than I have in mine elbows.

Deleted Comments: You Secular Porn Addicts Are Destroying America And Have Never Read Shakespeare!

We thought we were smart, but it turns out we're porn-addicted dummies who've never read Shakespeare. Ay, me!
The bowl of petunias only said, 'Oh no, not again.'

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Hey, Libturds, A Jar Of Pickles Is Not A Medical Exam!

In which our deleted commenters treat a comedy sketch like the Zapruder film. We can hardly wait for the Dinesh D'Souza feature-length documentary on Picklegate.
He hasn't even achieved his ultimate form

Who Knew Spiders Were Into Bondage? Your Saturday Nerdout

If it's weekend, it's time for nerding, so let's get caught up on our geekery. Or at least partly caught up. There is always more nerdy stuff out there! Of Arachnid Bondage A few weeks back, we brought you the thrilling...

Rub, Roll, Tie Up Big Meat And Heat Until Bulging, Dripping With Fat

Cook big pieces of meat in your oven during the winter to fill the air in your home with warmth and animal fat vapor. Porchetta (pronounced "porketta," and sometimes spelled that way, too) is a pork roast made up...

New Tech Thingy Will Protect You From the #Tyranny of Google Glass

Google Glass is the super-obnoxious new wearable technology that privacy advocates claim will turn America into the kind of dystopian panopticon envisioned by George Orwell, or Judas Priest, take your pick. Google Glass is ugly, it is dumb, and...

Sometimes Your 17-Year-Old Suggests The Best Gift Idea Ever

My son, Kid Zoom, turned 17 yesterday. I'd had no idea what to get him for his birthday, so last weekend I asked him what he'd like. His answer kind of blew me away, because what 17-year-old would ever...

Surprise, Breitbart Writer Does Not Know What ‘Orwellian’ Means, How To Read

If it's Tuesday, it must be time for someone on the internet to be fretting that English Is Doomed, and so is America, because of . And so let us spend a moment with poor Merrill Hope at Dead...

Sarah Palin Knows All About This George Orwell Fella, He’s The One Who Sent The Pig To The Jello Factory

Sarah Palin has been doin' some book learnin' and appears to have finally made it all the way through George Orwell's Animal Farm, which was probably pretty hard for her, let's be honest. She's so excited about her ever-growing...

Colorado State Sen. Kent Lambert Exposes ‘Mind Control’ Technology Behind Civil Unions, Then Spontaneously Combusts

How's this for a match made in heaven? No, not a ghey-marriage match, silly, those are lies from the pit of hell. We mean the combination of insane third-rate intertubes preacher Gordon "Chaps" Klingenschmitt, who sees demons everywhere --...

Victoria Jackson Warns Bill O’Reilly That Communists Will Kill All The Jesus Any Day Now

Victoria Jackson went on Bill O'Reilly's teevee show Wednesday and pulled off her signature alchemy again -- making whoever she's talking to seem lucid and reasonable by comparison. (OK, it doesn't always work.) In this latest visit to the...

Sales of ‘1984’ Way Up, Booz Allen Stock Down, 4th Amendment Downgraded To Junk Status

Following last week's revelations reminders of the government's extensive collection and monitoring of Americans' electronic data, sales of George Orwell's 1984 are up sharply, according to a piece in the Washington Examiner. Once this factoid hit the interwebs, the story...

Civil Rights Activist Mark Traina Would Like To Know: Is Your Wonkette A ‘Jewish Dyke’?

Last May, we brought you the news that the schoolchildren of Jefferson Parish, Louisiana, were the luckiest schoolchildren in the whole wide world, because their school psychologist, Mark A. Traina, was tweeting awesome stuff about how black children should...

Sundays With The Christianists: A ‘World History’ Textbook That May Not Know About Art, But Knows What God Likes

It's Art Depreciation Day for Homeschoolers, as we learn from our 10th-Grade textbook, World History and Cultures In Christian Perspective. After polishing off the dangerous liberal fads of "philosphy" and "education" last week, we're now ready to learn all...

Pothead Obama’s Five Tips For Good Pothead Writing

Yahoo has published more excerpts from David Maraniss' Barack Obama: The Story, mostly about how much he loved getting drunk and high and drag racing and then getting high again, while writing gay letters to ladies. Grow up, Obama...

Noted Literary Scholar Sarah Palin Tweets About Orwell, Obama

So is Sarah Palin saying George Orwell did not write fiction, he wrote history books, and thus Obama is rewriting this history? That must be terrifying for Sarah Palin, knowing that just decades ago farm animals established a communist...