Likely GOP nominee for president in 2008 and self-loathing Virginian Jew George Allen has landed hisself a fancy book deal, following in the footsteps of his idol, Ken Layne. It is titled The Triumph of Character: What Washington Can Learn from the World of Sports, so readers should expect an aesthetic mash-up of Matt Christopher and Leni Riefenstahl. MORE »

Hmm, yeah, why *didn’t* Barack Obama pick George Allen instead, since racism seems to be the soup o’ the day? No person in history has been shat upon more than the white land-owning male. [Twitter]

Remember hilarious football-holding horse-riding racist dildo George Allen? He was supposed to be the “new Ronald Reagan,” but the Daily Kos or whatever videotaped him calling a fellow of Indian ancestry some kind of African monkey. Next thing you know, people found out George Allen was ashamed to be a secret Jew, and he maybe stuffed the heads of deer into black people’s mailboxes (?), and it was all hilarious and wonderful. Anyway, George Allen’s back! And he will convince, er, black people to vote for the Republicans! MORE »

Today marks the two-year anniversary of The Macaca Incident, in which Virginia Republican Sen. George Allen, a then-likely 2008 presidential nominee, called a Jim Webb spy “macaca” — which is like the ersatz “n*****” in certain tropical parts of Asia — leading to a series of Prejudiced hole-digging by Allen (”I’m a Jew? Who knew! Well fuck the Jews”) and an utterly destroyed political career. And tonight there is an “Asian-Americans for Obama” event in Arlington to commemorate the legendary video, and it’s hosted by Kal Penn, the famous stoner actor from Hollywood pictures. [Raising Kaine]

Wonkette vanity plate operative “Anna” sends us this picture from some road in Fairfax, Virginia, of a racial car. We would like to take credit for the inspiration here. Is this former Sen. George Allen’s car, and HE TOO has taken up the Satire game? Or maybe the kid Allen called a “macaca,” this is his car. The latter would make more sense, since the modest amount of celebrity that incident gave him would, according to our Wonkette Fame=Money Algorithm, leave him with just enough cash to purchase a Honda CR-V.

Hello, people who are suddenly seeing famous-for-D.C. people everywhere in town all of a sudden! We like this, we like it very much. So this week, enjoy the voyeuristic fun of seeing James Carville, George Allen, lovebirds Dennis and Elizabeth Kucinich, Keith Olbermann, Martin Sheen and many more, after the jump. MORE »

Former Virginia Sen. George “Macaca” Allen filled out an NCAA Tournament bracket, and it is pretty, and he will share it with the world! Allen, however, is incapable of performing even the simplest tasks without being comical. He predicts #5 seed Notre Dame will beat #12 George Mason, but that is way too politically risky for his already destroyed political career in Virginia. So he scribbles in the margin, “tho for George Mason,” so you know where his heart is. And for #7 Gonzaga versus #10 Davidson, he predicts Davidson, against all mathematical odds! To highlight this brilliant prophecy, he writes “upset pick” in the margin. It seems he’s using all this free time to finally pass the first grade. [Full-size here]

The Republican party finds itself in a pickle this political season: how to point out subtle differences between John McCain and his future Presidential opponent without saying unpleasant words like “black” or “woman.” Several party leaders have already come up with brilliant solutions, revealed after the jump. MORE »

*MACACA!:* The big John McCain speech at CPAC — where conservatives might boo him — is being introduced by none other than America’s Racist, former Sen. George “Macaca” Allen.

He was our greatest governor (of Virginia) and our greatest American senator. He loved the Confederate Flag, holding footballs, and terrorizing the Negroes. Also, he was photographed astride a horse, so he was obviously the new Ronald Reagan and was supposed to have an easy ride to the White House this year. But this legacy of greatness was destroyed by idiot liberals who had to make a big deal of his casual racism.

And now George Allen is refusing to run for governor again next year. Thanks a lot, jerk. What are we supposed to write about in ‘09 now?

Allen Won’t Run For Va. Governor [Washington Post]

Macaca and The Beard had a chat on CNN yesterday about Fred Thompson and the election. (Jesus, that was five of Wonkette’s least favorite people/things in the same sentence)! Anyway, The Beard also asked Macaca what he thinks about the Internet, which virally obliterated his political career last fall (ah, sweet memories). Macaca loves it though! And he loves the Guttenberg press! No love, however, for 18th-century pamphleteering, which was easily the peak of socially aware douchebag dissemination.