If you haven’t heard, which most people haven’t, there’s a little situation in Kenya. It turns out that they just had “elections” and unsurprisingly their current dictator-esque guy, Mwai Kibaki, “won.” Protests originally led by the opposition, who were backing candidate Raila Odinga, have led to ethnic violence, charges of genocide, 100,000 people displaced and at least 300 deaths so far. But, you know, the media already did fucked up elections in a country filled with brown people last week, Darfur has given everyone Africa fatigue, no one’s killing the white people like Mugabe’s minions did in Zimbabwe so there’s no immediate, obvious hook except… the elephants! There are elephants in Kenya! If the violences gets really bad they might, um, like, lose habitat or something. So, save the elephants! Because then people might care enough to even pay attention! [Yahoo News]

The Turks are so angry that a House committee declared their 1915 massacre of 1.5 million Armenians a genocide, they’re going kill all the Kurds. [NYT]

A House resolution that would recognize the 1915 Armenian Genocide as, well, a genocide is running into some problems: America’s strategic interests! You see, we are best (strategic) buds with the internationally despised Turks, because they let us use an air base. And as we all know, access to air bases trumps symbolic recognition of unthinkable acts of evil every time. MORE »

Hoping to stop a Nixonian political comeback, a Serbian man went to the grave of war criminal Slobodan Milosevic on Saturday night and hammered a wooden stake through the dead strongman’s heart. MORE »

Now look, ABC: we’ve known plenty of people who’ve taken drugs that do that, and they usually just end up babbling all night about Radiohead and going home with someone creepy — they don’t commit genocide, fer chrissakes. MORE »