gay marriage
Ernest J. Pagels, Jr. was supposed to be the FUTURE. Now our paranoid schizophrenic angel has decided to give up on us after failing to make it on the ballot. Pagels called Wonkette, the world’s number-one source for Pagels information (besides that Wisconsin court database) to deliver the bad news. “I’m just letting you know [...]
Teabagger groups have not said anything yet about that ruling on the Defense of Marriage Act last week! Some feel hating the gays on this would distract from the Teabaggers’ real issue, paranoid schizophrenia “fiscal matters.” “Privately, though, many said they back the decision because it emphasizes the legal philosophy of states’ rights.” That Taxachusetts [...]
Your right-wing types often go on and on and on about “keeping the gummint out of my hair” and “state rights,” and take as their proof text the Tenth Amendment to the Constitution, which basically says that the Feds can’t do anything but fight wars and mint gold coins and maybe build interstate highways, and [...]
Traditionally, the governors of all the states on both sides of the U.S.-Mexico border (did you know that Mexico has “states,” with “governors”?) get together once a year to “celebrate border bonhomie … issue proclamations and pledges to work together, air grievances and concerns behind closed doors.” In other words, they drink unseemly amounts of [...]
Things are pretty bad when you’re asking the Russians to invade you, right? Well, it seems that things are pretty bad in y-happy Kyrgyzstan right now, with the ethnic riots, and the death, and the flows of refugees to the Uzbek border! And so they’re asking the Russians to, uh, send troops to restore order [...]
Ha, remember way back in 2008 when the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, a tax-exempt religious organization based in Utah, poured a bunch of money and volunteer labor into the campaign that got gay marriage banned in California? And remember how a lot of people who were sort of startled when the [...]
Were you all bummed out because the Goldman Sachs investigation was just this wimpy little civil suit from a bunch of bureaucrat nobodies at the SEC, whose only enforcement power is imposing tiny fines on impossibly rich people? Fear not! Now federal prosecutors are sniffing around this slimy cadre of villains. Soon there will be [...]
Last week, the Washington Post published a front-page photo of two (gay?) men kissing in the courthouse’s “gay marriage line.” Many readers were furious. Today, Washington Post ombudsman Andrew Alexander determines once and for all whether this gay kiss ever even happened.
On this glorious morning in DC, the first legal weddings of the homosexuals took place. Hooray! And all thanks to Supreme Court Chief Justice John “Gay” Roberts, who so loves his people that he didn’t overturn the local law or call for mass arrests or appoint George W. Bush president. About a hundred couples are [...]
“We’re talking about taking the penis of a man and putting it in the rectum of another man and wriggling it around in excrement. And you have to think, would I want that to be done to me?” Oof. Time for Nancy Elliott’s husband to lower his expectations. [YouTube]
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA: Harold Ford Junior, who voted for a constitutional ban on gay marriage while representing Tennessee in the House, is of course now an avid and lifetime supporter of both gay marriage AND civil unions, whatever that means? “I love you youze fags,” Ford told New York voters today. [Ben Smith]
Beloved Bush Administration political hack Karl Rove just got divorced from his lady wife! Who even knew, right? Anyway, the Roves were officially divorced in Texas (!) last week, and it’s suddenly all over the Internets, and Dana Perino is “family spokeswoman,” and Karl is celebrating by continuing to post banal GOP talking points and [...]
Yesterday, your Jim Newell announced DC’s gay-marriage-is-okay news with this caveat: “HOWEVER, while Father Congress is not expected to go all ‘Home Rule’ and block this sucker, we’re about 99.9% sure that one congressman or another representing some salty swamp in the middle of nowhere will make a half-assed attempt to ruin this, score a [...]
