Oklahoma state Rep. Sally Kern is famous for hating the Gays this one time, on YouTube, last year. In a hilarious recorded message to supporters, she claimed that the Gay Cancer was going to kill everyone, making the Gays “the biggest threat our nation has, even more so than terrorism or Islam.” And then everyone kept calling her son gay, which he denied, although he was “affiliated with the Des Moines School of Metaphysics,” which means: gay as the dickens. But this is all old news. The new news is that Ms. Rep. Kern has introduced a delightful new bill into her legislative chamber! MORE »

Wonkette’s “Gay, In Chicago” Operative “ManofSteel” attended his city’s fancy Gay Pride Parade this weekend, for fun, and who did he see there but U.S. “Senator for Life” Roland Burris! Here’s our leader in some fancy rich man’s car. Didn’t he know that you can get sick at these things?

Here is a tragic sweet love tale: the mayor of a lil’ Texas town abdicated his position to run off to Mexico with his illegal immigrant boyfriend, the Wallis Simpson of San Angelo. People are sad because this mayor was a very good mayor, and got elected to four terms! MORE »

Oh dear, poor Chuckles. His Senate challenger, Wingnut #A, has already thrown together his first secretly-has-gay-overtones attack ad against the orange governor, who is shown “embracing” Barack Obama, intimately, maybe with his mouth. Or are we reading into this too much? Obviously! But still, OY. Being secretly gay will not make this a fun year-long primary season for Charlie Crist. [The Plum Line]

Oh brother, here we go again. Charlie Crist, the governor of Florida, is known for precisely two things: being orange, and having a dreadful porn mustache in the 1970s, which was the style at the time. Everybody likes to make jokes about how (allegedly!) gay he is, jokes that were only made more hilarious by his engagement to a lady right around the time last year that John McCain was supposed to pick him as his running “mate.” MORE »

OBAMA CALLS CRIST GAY IN PUBLIC: Con sarn it, only this morning we had decided we were sick of the old “Charlie Crist is gay” jokes, but then Barack Obama went ahead and delivered this line at their Fort Myers town hall meeting today: “Everybody needs to grab a hose, and that’s what Charlie Crist is doing right here today.” NSFW video at 23/6 “The Huffington Post Comedy Section.” [HuffPo]

This is Ken Blackwell, the man who STOLE THE 2004 ELECTION FOR GEORGE W. BUSH IN OHIO & AMERICA and is now running for RNC chairman. He just wants to let you know that he’s not gay but if he did have the gay “compulsion” he could fight it, and not have sex with dudes, because he’s a tuff guy like that. Not that he’s ever felt the gay disease before, but if he had felt it, you know… the point here is that Ken Blackwell’s a gay! MORE »

Remember how everybody got all excited at the thought of a lesbian running the Labor Department? Well, that didn’t happen — instead some boring straight lady who at least had the decency to be a Latina was appointed. So where are all the gays in Obama’s grand new rainbow government of change? Now we have our answer: managing the secretarial pool. MORE »

We have received a full 956 tips today about various clowns’ Twitter pages being hacked, including those of Barack Obama and Rick Sanchez, the King of Twitter. Someone thinks this official message from the Fox News about Bill “O Riley” indicates hacking, but what’s the excuse for “Turkey Taco Lettuce Wraps?” The more important question here is why anyone on this planet uses Twitter at all. (Except for Wonkette’s Twitter, which is just great.) [Towleroad]

Hey gays, here’s your least favorite person in the world, Noobama, who had been introducing some new economic slobs at a presser until the Q&A, when everyone asks him why he picked Chunksy McLardtits to deliver the Christian speech at his inauguration. Obama responds, “UHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” and then offers a series of actual words that basically carry the same weight as “UHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.” MORE »

So Barack Obama, in the spirit of Christian charity and forgiveness, invited Pastor Rick Warren to deliver the invocation at his inaugural. (Rick Warren is the man who humiliated Barack Obama by forcing him to admit publicly that he is not a professional abortionist. Also Rick Warren hates the gays, who hate him back.) Now a series of “talking points” have surfaced, in the inbox of Huffington Post supersleuth Sam Stein, defensively defending Obama’s decision to give this goateed turd a speaking spot. MORE »