When we last cared about Gary Ackerman, he was accidentally voting against pornography. Yesterday, though, he planted himself firmly on the side of the steamy and unlikely fantasies of teenage boys. MORE »

Canada has just beat Gary Ackerman by like A BILLION.

Canada has finally managed to one-up us. In hilarious congressional incompetence, where previously only the Italians presented a serious challenge. Canada doesn’t have the bomb, does it? We’re suddenly way more worried about them than Iran. MORE »

Gary Ackerman (D-NY), seen here penning erotic Buffy fanfic, gave an impassioned speech on the floor of the House decrying the bill that boosted indecency fines tenfold for TV networks. It even ended with the classic legislative sendoff, “Mr. Speaker, I for one will be voting against this bill.” The only problem: He voted for it. MORE »

* “Podfisking,” it’s all the rage. [Andrew Sullivan] MORE »

MORE »

• Heard on the Hill: Rep. Gary Ackerman (D-N.Y.) defends his manicures. . . Clintons had a late dinner at Cafe Milano last Thursday. [Roll Call]

• Cindy Adams: Expect “another 11″ indictments. [NYP]
• Inside the Beltway: Air Force One costs about $60,000 per hour to operate. [WT]

* Reliable Source: RNC returns fire: “Senator Clinton would be better served if she spent less time flattering herself with perceived obsessions and more time focusing on her job.”. . . Arnold Schwarzenegger shows off “huge stogie” in the lobby of the Four Seasons. . . Anna Nicole Smith checked into a Georgetown hotel yesterday. [WP]
* Under the Dome: Lobbyists bask in the flattery of parody film “Thank You For Smoking”. . . Moby joins with Sen. Robert Byrd (D-W.Va.) and Rep. Gary Ackerman (D-N.Y.) to protect animals. . . Staffer of Rep. Denny Rehberg (R-Mont.) punches intoxicated bar patron after harassment. [The Hill]
* Rush & Molloy: Some pool correspondents believe Bush wears his bike uniform under his suit when he goes to church; there is a mysterious “bulkiness.” [NYDN]
* Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: “You Don’t Know Dick” action figure of a “snarling, shotgun-toting (but not anatomically correct)” Dick Cheney is selling for $29.95. [NYDN]