Wonkette

Beloved pretend congresslady Shelley “Dracula Cunt” Sekula Gibbs lost her hundredth straight election the other day — losing a GOP primary runoff to some nobody — and now her dreams and even this sign are in the garbage, forever, along with an empty bottle of $2.99 “Barefoot Chardonnay” and some type of (Nazi?) lager bottle and enough coat hangers for a hundred Texas abortions. Farewell, sweet rodeo princess of our heart! Photo courtesy of Wonkette Operative “John.”

Hillary Clinton’s staffers have been soiling carpets and leaving mountains of rotting garbage in rented temporary campaign offices — and then not paying the bill when they skip town to move on to the next primary state. MORE »

* “And our men try to subdue it / they jump on its back / like overripe plums falling from trees / to tame the horse of the planet.” [City Desk]
* Why don’t you just walk all the way to the Alternative Transportation Fair, hippie? [CommuterPageBlog]
* Queen Elizabeth: once our oppressor, now our friend. [Yahoo News]
* Ian MacKaye hears dead people. [Idolater]
* “To whoever has our trash cans: I hope you enjoy them. I hope, very soon, you accidentally place something very dear to you in one of them. I hope you then realize that you’ve done this about an hour after the bins are picked up.” [From Harvard Street]
* Hey guys, New Intern #1 did this post! [gregwasserstrom.com]

Our Anonymous Hill Staffer, direct from Bangalore: “So I got a lot of questions that couldn’t be answered by a Hill staffer without a little help… luckily, every government agency (and most NGOs) have departments dedicated to answering the asinine questions of Hill staffers… so I forwarded the questions along, and paraphrased their answers back.”

We gotta say, your questions are getting weirder. Death, taxes, and garbage disposals, after the jump.

MORE »