Tag: gallup

Oh God, Another ‘HOLY CRAP, WHAT A SHITTY TRUMP POLL’ Post? You Bet Your Ass!

He literally must be so tired of winning.

Donald Trump Practicing Self-Care In Face Of Mean Barack Obama Triggering Him

Somebody needs to go to his safe space.
Dirty mouth!

Dear Congress: We Hate You. XOXO, America

It has been a while since we pretended we didn't already know the answer to the question: Do Americans like Congress, yes or no? Last time, the answer was "HAHAHA, you're joking, right? I'd rather have head lice and...
No, but the little booger has made some unbelievable gaffes

White People Upset At White People For Being Mean To Blacks, Guess It’s Serious Now

So you know how polls about race always seem to show that black people think racism is still a thing, while white people mostly perceive it as something from the Olden Times, like way back before "Good Times," even? Here's...
This is what Obamacare insurance cards look like, right?

Tyrant Obamacare Insuring More Americans Than Ever, Thanks Obama!

Looking at this new chart from the Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index, America is starting to resemble a developed nation! In 2013, just before the forcible throat-cramming of quality, affordable healthcare began, 18% of Americans were uninsured. And now that number is...
They still love us. Suckers!

Stupid Americans Still Admire Obama And Clinton The Most, Even Though They Are The Worst

Jeez, America, how dumb can you be? You know President Obama is the worst president who ever presidented because the completely not-biased opposing political party keeps telling us so. And yet, because you are SO dumb, America, you insist...

Oh, Remember When Congress Hit That All Time Approval Rating Low? Yeah, Guess What

You know what is even less popular than interracial marriage? Congress, what because of how they suck times a million. But America continues to hold them in lower and lower regard, according to a new Gallup poll. How bad...

Ted Cruz Not Wrong About Shutdown Strategy, Says Ted Cruz

One of the most hilarious sideshows of the great SHUTDOWNGHAZI!!!11!! has been the sight of Republicans tripping over their own dicks to spin some very unfavorable poll numbers in favorable ways. Yesterday it was pre-ferment sourdough starter Erick Erickson...

Republican Party’s Favorability Hits All-Time Low, Proving That We Must Repeal Obamacare

You see that picture up there, with the jaggedy lines? It's a "graph," and it shows that 28% of Americans have a favorable view of the Republican Party, according to Gallup. Maybe you think that's pretty good, considering that the...

Congratulations, Congress! Americans Hate You Slightly Less Now

You know how everyone pretty much hates Congress? True story! A PPP poll in January found Congress less popular than root canals, head lice, cockroaches, and, worst of all, Nickelback. Maybe it is because this particular Congress is on...

Already Focused On Losing In 2016, Republicans Want Paul Ryan For President

Here's a poll from Gallup that nicely encapsulates why the Republican party is so screwed: Among Republicans, Paul Ryan is the top choice out of five prospective candidates to lose the presidency to Hillary in 2016 (the others were,...

Study: Republicans Oppose ‘Assisted Suicide,’ Cool With ‘Painless End Of Life’

Look, Democrats have a lot going for them right now. There’s our “flashy” President B. Barry Bamz and his healthcare law that can’t possibly be as bad as Republicans have spent the last half a decade derping that it...

Without Gallup’s Crappy Polls, Nate Silver Is Nothing, Says Gallup

One of the "fun" things about presidential elections is that every four years there's a new dumb thing about the process for political junkies to yell at each other about despite the disinterest or genuine disgust of normals, and...

How Is Chicago Thug Barack Obama Threatening People Today?

Sexboat toe goblin Dick Morris has some thoughts on the typically thuggish Chicago regime, and how they "Rough Up Gallup for Polls They Don't Like." Get ready you guys, because it is terrifying! In a scene right...

Gallup: Record High Number Of Pro-Life Americans Want To Kill Your Children

Fun news for chart nerds! Gallup has once again released its annual poll illustrating how much Americans hate abortion by saying it should be legal in all or certain cases. That's right, "pro-choicers" are at a "record low" of...

70% of America ‘Dreading’ 2012 Presidential Campaign

Ha ha, here is a fun new study that proves everybody would basically like to trade the 2012 presidential election for, say, a massive asteroid strike: Gallup asked voters how jazzed they were for the Obama-Not Romney campaign year,...