What with all the youth indoctrination and the video death panels and the actual Hitler plot to provide basic health care for working Americans, we almost forgot it was also Sonia Sotomayor’s fake first day on the nation’s highest court! No real work today, just a photo op, and here’s the touching photo! The only real question is WHAT THE HELL IS SCALIA UP TO? HE IS CREEPING US OUT. Maybe he’s just happy for real, because there’s finally another Italian on the Supreme Court? Anyway, remember all the bogus outrage about Sotomayor, a million years few weeks ago? All forgotten. Let the SCOTUS-controlled redistribution of wealth commence! [White House Flickr]

Not even the standard American grocery store is safe from do-gooder produce fanatic Barack Obama and his “town halls,” which now apparently take place at the only non-drive-thru buildings where the Citizens can be expected to show up with any regularity. MORE »

Barack’s got the ‘puter all to himself! What will he do? Order pizza? Play some sort of online fighting game? Leave more hilarious comments on RonPaulForums.com? Check out his fancy Chicago ‘hood on Zillow to see how much his neighbors’ houses have dropped in value? Hack Twitter again just because Twitter is so lame? That’s right, it’s the late-night weekend Wonkette Caption Contest! [White House Flickr]

Blogger “Tim C.” has posted an excellent “Child’s Garden of Teabaggery” photo tour at Blue Hampshire depicting insane children holding signs at yesterday’s Portsmouth gun rally. This is our favorite, with the little girl holding up some confusing child-labor slogan right next to a freaking real-life Walter Sobchak describing his consecutive mouth- and anal-rape fantasies. In another photo, a little girl argues for tort reform. [Blue Hampshire]

Okay, famous White House photographer Pete Souza, we realize it’s August and nobody wants to work at all and there’s nothing very news-y happening and everybody’s on vacation WE GET IT, fine, but we’re still sort of working and you are still supposed to be working, yet there is one (1) White House photo added to the Official Presidential Flickr for the entire week, and it is lame. MORE »

You know how some business trips end up with everybody naked in the hot tub singing Don’t Stop Believin’, and others end with everybody awkwardly standing around making small talk while furtively glancing at their watches? Bill Clinton’s North Korea summer vacation trip likely falls into the latter category, which is a historical first for Bill Clinton. [The Awl via ... North Korea Propaganda Office, maybe?]

Hey everybody, some birthers are just wandering around various Senate and House office buildings, bothering the shit out of staffers and interns, and then twatting about it, on the Twitter. David Weigel, the Stephen Crane + Ernie Pyle × Martha Gellhorn of the Tea Party-Birthers Wars, has the whole collection of retardation, go look at it and laugh, for America. [Washington Independent]

Whoa, Newsmax, what kind of crazy are you sending us on this lazy summer afternoon? WHAT?! Famous millionaire Doctor Pizza is giving away free guns? For the coming race war? Sign us up, for FREE! Seriously go sign up and get these free guns because guess who will get them if you don’t?

While the Main Stream Media (MSG) was wrapped up in the pointless, breathless, click-y coverage of Barack Obama serving beer to a Harvard professor, his vice president and some dumb mick cop, the real story was Obama’s secret meeting with the Chinese, as photographed here by Pete Souza’s spy camera. Why is Barack Obama giving our nation’s legacy (a basketball) to this combover fellow from China? [White House Flickr]

Ha, wingnuts, good luck getting Republican senators and congressmen to vote for their own fiery destruction! UPDATE: Yes, it was sent out three days after the Senate F-22 vote. [Newsmax email]

No, not at all! According to famous wingnut blog “The Drudge Report,” it is about a giant looming Pedobear who will “fix” your “health” by, uhm, raping children. Is that what you people want?