Tag Archives: funny jokes

  we hates the tricksy noonanses! hates them!

Peggy Noonan Plays A Clever Rhetorical Trick! Watch Carefully And See If You Can Catch It!

You guys! Peggy Noonan wrote a very, very persuasive column that plays a funny “trick” on the reader! See if you can guess where she is heading with this! Just guess! It is astonishing and cannot go unremarked that Mississippi’s Gov. Frank “Boo” Burnham, the conservative who won a 2011 landslide, gave an interview Friday in which he demonstrated all that is wrong in American politics—all its division, its intolerance, its ignorance and sickness. Burnham damned and removed from the rolls of the respectable everyone in his state who is pro-choice, who is for some form of gun control, and who supports gay marriage. In a radio interview marked by a tone of smug indignation and self-righteousness, Burnham said “extreme liberals” who are “for abortion, who hate guns, who want homosexuals to marry — if that’s who they are they’re the extreme liberals, they have no place in the state of Mississippi because that’s not who Mississippians are.” Did you spot it yet? Did you? We bet maybe you did! Read more on Peggy Noonan Plays A Clever Rhetorical Trick! Watch Carefully And See If You Can Catch It!…
  somebody's got a case of the mondays

At Texas Legislator’s Car Dealership, Tasings Will Continue Until Morale Improves

A Houston man with no sense of humor is suing his former employer, a car dealership co-owned by Texas State Rep. Patricia Harless, after coworkers attacked him with a stun gun in what the coworkers were certain was a series of hilarious pranks. Bradley Jones says that over a nine month period, fellow employees at Fred Fincher Motors repeatedly sneaked up on him and shocked him with the device. He said it happened at least two dozen times and each incident left him more on edge. “I was constantly looking behind my shoulder, distracted, couldn’t sleep,” Jones said. “I would even look behind my shower curtain at home.” Jones insists the tasings were not actually funny, even though videos posted to YouTube clearly show his coworkers laughing uproariously each time Jones is shocked. Read more on At Texas Legislator’s Car Dealership, Tasings Will Continue Until Morale Improves…
  whistling past the graveyard

Daily Caller Dances On Ghost Andrew Breitbart’s Internet Grave

Yesterday the Internet had such fun with the piling-on of Poor Ben Shapiro’s “Friends of Hamas” journabacle, and his subsequent feverish quadrupling-down. It was such fun that even Ghost Andrew Breitbart’s goosesteppers-in-arms, Tucker Carlson’s Daily Caller, got in on the action this morning. And — we shit you not — they were kind of FUNNY? Included in their list of 15 nefarious organizations from whom Sad Clown Chuck Hagel might have accepted money were “Friends of Pol Pot” and “Young Americans for Genocide” and (our favorite!) “St. Judes Hospital that Does Research on Children.” St. Jude’s Hospital That Does Research on Children! THAT IS ACTUALLY VERY GOOD! But oh, would you believe it? It seems some of their readers did not quite “get” the joke. Weird! Read more on Daily Caller Dances On Ghost Andrew Breitbart’s Internet Grave…
  that's a clown joke bro

Rodeo Clown Figgers Rodeo-Goers Will Just Love Racist Joke About Michelle Obama

We don’t know if you have heard, but Michelle Obama IS BLACK, YOU GUYS, GROSS. That was the punchline of the hilarious joke that tickled the earholes of all the attendees at the Creston Classic Rodeo, in the golden hills outside Paso Robles, in California’s inner Kentucky. [T]he joke as told by the announcer, went something like this: Playboy is offering Ann Romney $250,000 to pose in the magazine and the White House is upset about it because National Geographic only offered Michelle Obama $50 to pose for them. Then the crowd laughed and laughed, except for how they didn’t. Read more on Rodeo Clown Figgers Rodeo-Goers Will Just Love Racist Joke About Michelle Obama…
  license to kill

‘Pretend It’s Obama’ Suggests Hilarious Lady As Rick Santorum Shoots at Target

Here is the funniest joke you will ever hear, falling from the nicotine-stained teeth of a southern belle: “Pretend it’s Obama!” It’s funny, you see, because Rick Santorum is shooting a gun! As her friends laugh and laugh at her witticism (which Santorum didn’t hear, obvs, he is wearing headphones), she indulges in a few modest chuckles herself. (Santorum later said the remark was terrible and horrible and he was glad he didn’t hear it. GLAD, HE SAID. Why is Rick Santorum racist against the Freedom of Speech of Southern white ladies?) Don’t bother going to the Chuckle Hut tonight: all the haws you need are here. Laugh along with the Secret Service, right after the jump! Read more on ‘Pretend It’s Obama’ Suggests Hilarious Lady As Rick Santorum Shoots at Target…
  that's not racial transcendence

‘Don’t Re-Nig’ Lady Has Magic Dictionary That Says ‘N-Word’ Is Not Racist

We’re not sure what “dictionary” Miz Paula Smith of Hinesville, Georgia, “reads,” but she clearly has Knowledge on her side when she says the n-word “is not racist.” Roger Friedman of Forbes got Miz Smith on the tallyphone to ask her why her company, Stickatude, has been selling some perhaps-inelegant bumper stickers that have doubtless been enlivening your MyFace page all week. “According to the dictionary,” she told him, “[the N word] does not mean black. It means a low down, lazy, sorry, low down person. That’s what the N word means.” Read more on ‘Don’t Re-Nig’ Lady Has Magic Dictionary That Says ‘N-Word’ Is Not Racist…
  fap fap fap

Gridiron Dinner Features Usual Masturbatory Hijinks, Minus The President

Barack Obama missed out on the much-ballyhooed Gridiron Dinner this weekend, an event in which journalists and politicians sit around very expensive tables with long white linen tablecloths and quietly give each other handjobs. Instead the president stayed at Camp David with his family, blah. Fortunately, Joe Biden attended the dinner and brought home the larfs. Read more on Gridiron Dinner Features Usual Masturbatory Hijinks, Minus The President…
 

John McCain’s Hilariously Canned One-Liner About Barack Obama And Jimmy Carter!

John McCain enjoys a well-deserved reputation as a charismatic, maverick jokester with a devastating wit. Plus, he likes Ernest Hemingway, so he knows good writin’! So it’s no surprise that, a minute and a half into an interview with Brian Williams, he would bust out with a fantastic bit of silver tonguery about Barack Obama being the second coming of Jimmy Carter — and then laugh uncomfortably at his own joke while Brian Williams asks, “Why do you say that?” See the excruciating footage after the jump. Read more on John McCain’s Hilariously Canned One-Liner About Barack Obama And Jimmy Carter!…