WASHINGTON, DC, 08:19 AM, FRI NOVEMBER 27 | Advertise on Wonkette | tips@wonkette.com | SUBMIT A TIP | RSS

Posts Tagged ‘funny headlines’

LIARS

Saddest Huckabee Headline Ever

Monday, November 9th, 2009

Yes Mike, we know, that’s fine. [Ben Smith]


MILLIONS OF ACTUAL STATES

The HuffPo Has A Scoop!

Friday, September 4th, 2009

As tipster “Geoff” notes, the economy is much worse than we’d thought. [HuffPo]


TUESDAY FUN LINK

Notable Banking Pamphlet Composes Important Headline

Tuesday, May 26th, 2009

What does this have to do with politics? Everything. “All of my blog posts are political blog posts,” Bob Dylan once said, and this is true. All of the WSJ’s punny wordsmithery is political punny wordsmithery: “Hip-hop luminaries with the cash to keep it real are appalled. Bling aficionados fret that the art of ‘ice’ is being watered down.” NOOOOO! [WSJ]


LIKE THE COCAINE

Monday, January 19th, 2009

NYT DROPS BOMBSHELL ON INAUG. EVE: Literally nothing in life is funnier than when a NYTimes.com web editor takes the last name of columnist/blogger Charles Blow and places it alongside a headline or teaser that suggests something sexual or drug-related, as this one does. Name one thing that is funnier than this. UPDATE: Ken was going to write this exact same post but with this pretty illustration depicting the Times’ virulent hatred of black people. [NYT]


MICROTRENDS

Furries Still Excitable, Despite Recession

Monday, December 15th, 2008

This is always the problem with furries: they talk a good game, and that’s about it. Even during the recession. [SF Chronicle]


SERVICE ECONOMY

Barack Obama Has A Special Gift For America’s Leaders!

Tuesday, December 2nd, 2008

Country above self!Handjobs. Handjobs for everyone. [New York Times]


PHUNNY

HALPERIN: MCCAIN HAS UNFORTUNATELY TIMED ERECTION

Thursday, September 25th, 2008

Oh sure it’s an old joke, mispronouncing House minority leader John Boehner’s last name (it’s really pronounced “Choire”). But still: ha ha, “penis.” Halperin YOU SCALAWAG, you totally had this in mind. [The Page]


KANGAROO RATS FROM OUTER SPACE

‘Outer Space’ And ‘Rats’ Mentioned In Non-Wonkette News Source

Thursday, September 18th, 2008

Best headline ever writtenSorry, was it just yesterday that mean Ken Layne was mocking the AP for being so awful? Correction: Best news source on the planet … any planet. (Thank you tipster donner_froh.) [AP]


NO AMERICAN IS SAFE

Downtrodden Texans Brace For Next Horror

Tuesday, September 16th, 2008

Worse than MothraYay it’s your weekly CNN headline funny! Pack up all your worldly belongings, board up the windows, and kiss your nice pets goodbye forever. Hurricane Ike sucked, but it’s nothing compared to this fearsome “Bush,” which destroys literally everything it touches. [CNN]


DIG!

Wait Now, Who Probed Who That Was Sexing What With Oil?

Wednesday, September 10th, 2008

Since this news headline alone goes above and beyond our joke-per-post quota, we’ll leave it at that. As soon as we determine the nature of this oil sex — as in, was it consensual middle-management heterosexual sex or was it, say, Republican big shots ass-raping young male slaves? — we will decide whether or not to keep covering it. Any Interior Department staffers want to clue us in? UPDATE: It seems like heterosexual sex, boo. But was it vaginal? [AP/KTVU]


DICK CHENEY

Dick Cheney Treats Prostitutes Like Dirt!

Monday, June 9th, 2008

He probably raised the bills just high enough to be out of reach for a 12-year-old Thai slaveboy. Sexistracist. [TwinCities.com]