fundraising
Organizers of Wisconsin’s effort to recall remorseless demon Scott Walker from office are said to be dumping three thousand pounds of petition signatures off with election officials today per the collection deadline, hooray! Scott Walker is taking the news exactly like the comical cartoon villain that he is, and he immediately flew to New York [...]
The Democratic Party is still not entirely sure what to do with this “Occupy Wall Street” stuff beyond allowing for a few cautious statements from one or another “liberal” member of Congress let out of the pen for a few minutes to say something to the effect of “it’s possible people might be somewhat fed [...]
Rick Perry was going to save the Republicans from having to vote for a liberal Mormon from Taxachusetts, but then Rick Perry actually opened his mouth, and everybody outside of Texas realized for the first time that he’s an imbecile. It seemed Perry had everything it took to become president of America, as he is [...]
This is a screen capture from the exciting beggar’s epistle that arrived in our inbox today from Michele Bachmann! See it there at the bottom, that last sentence? Right, so here’s our question: does this mean Michele Bachmann would actually, personally write “Thank you, Jism! Love, Michele” in one of her vulgar vampire fiction books [...]
Man, who knows how to monetize “doing nothing” better than grifter-quitter grandma Sarah Palin? Palin’s SarahPAC sent out a letter asking for more donations in order to help Sarah in “making her decision of whether or not to run for office,” because Sarah Palin is the kind of narcissistic psycho hosebeast who believes she is [...]
THERE’S OUR MITTENS! He did it! That’s 10 mill right there!
Is Mitt Romney running for president? Are Native Americans actually Jews?! Of course he is! He’s always running for president. But Mittens is playing along with this game all the other candidates are doing, putting off announcing their run for as long as possible in the hope that, by the time the Republican electorate realizes [...]
Michele Bachmann may have been spurned by the establishment when she made a play for the Republican leadership of the House, but that just made her want to run for the Senate. And now she has decided to “seriously weigh” running for president of the United States. Hooray! She will hold every elected office in [...]
An anonymous source has told AP that perennial Senate witch Christine O’Donnell is under investigation by the FBI for campaign fraud. Which is too bad, because the entire news media would like to high-five this source right now. So how did the crack FBI team figure out that O’Donnell was “using campaign money to pay [...]
When Michele Bachmann lost her bid to join the Republican House leadership last month, an idiot or two decided this meant her increasing crazy-fueled political power had finally hit a wall. (Or a glass ceiling. Or a wall made out of brick and abortion-blood mortar. Etc.) But perhaps the reason she lost isn’t that her [...]
