freepers

WE WERE TOLD THERE WOULD BE NO MATH  12:19 pm May 22, 2013

Separating Fiction From Even Weirder Fiction: A Special Fun Wonkette Quiz About The Weather

by snipy

Everyone in the online universe has already pointed out that Oklahoma Senator Jim Inhofe (R-Tornado Alley) voted against Hurricane Sandy aid last year but will probably collect sweet sweet government monies for the Oklahoma disaster. (AS WELL HE SHOULD DAMMIT BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT THE GOVERNMENT IS THERE FOR EVEN IF YOUR SENATOR IS A [...]

WHINGE NUTS  12:30 pm November 10, 2012

A Children’s Treasury Of Random Wingnut Post-Election Whining (Part 1 of ???)

by Doktor Zoom

Do you people have any idea how hard it is to sift through all the insane rightwing mutterings about the reelection of Barack Obama so that we can bring you the very best? Neither do we! It all starts looking the same after about five minutes! And so, this collection of freakouts will, of necessity, [...]

WINGNUT THOUGHT EXPERIMENTS  3:05 pm September 5, 2012

Freepers Excited About Prospects Of New Civil War, Yet Again

by Doktor Zoom

Our friends over at Free Republic do not have a lot of confidence that U.S. America can possibly last much longer, what with all the socialism and the welfare and the fiat money and the welfare and the food stamps, also Obama will take everyone’s guns. Also, welfare. So they are ever vigilant for the [...]

ANGER PORN  11:28 am July 4, 2012

A Children’s Treasury Of Wingnut Remembrances Of Communist Traitor Andy Griffith, Who Burns In Hell

by Doktor Zoom

Happy Independence Day, U.S. Americans! Iconic actor Andy Griffith, who played Iconic Sheriff Andy “Lonesome Rhodes” Matlock on the Iconic Teevee, died July 3 at the age of 86, and Wingnut America honored his memory with an outpouring of patriotic fervor, remembering how the late actor embodied decent small-town values, common-sense parenting, and destroying America [...]

COME ON PEOPLE ... THINK!  5:21 pm March 24, 2010

Freepers Just Brainstorming Some GOP Marketing Ideas, That’s All

by Ken Layne

Let’s see let’s see what will make Americans realize that getting some basic assurances of health care in this country is a super-bad & extra-terrible thing?

OVERCOOKED FOODS ARE TERRIFYING  11:09 am March 22, 2010

Freepers So Angry They Will Burn Toast At You!

by Sara K. Smith

The latest “put a food item in the mail to Washington, DC in order to send a strongly worded message to whomever” stunt involves … a cooked bread thing! Note that bread does not appear even once in the Constitution, which is a smear on Ron Paul and our other Founding Fathers. This is why [...]

CAUSAL RELATIONSHIPS  1:47 pm November 23, 2009

Freepers Are Going To Protest Existence Of Muslims By Boycotting Best Buy

by Juli Weiner

OH woah woah woah, Best Buy has wished Muslims a Happy Eid al-Adha, the Islamic festival of sacrifice during which Muslims are traditionally encouraged to donate to charity?? Uhh nice try. Free Republic will boycott Best Buy now, just cold won’t shop there anymore, maybe it’ll even go out of business, right? And when all [...]

REPUBLICANS IN THE NEWS  2:22 pm July 22, 2009

Whoa Hey, the FreeRepublic Website Is Overthrowing the U.S. Government

by Ken Layne

This would be terrifying if it wasn’t about some lamer old wingnuts and their message board: The person who runs FreeRepublic.com is cold gonna overthrow the U.S. government — that means you, blackenstein — and ho ho, no more taxes on the millionaires! Hooray! Anyway, folks, things are getting Seriously Weird with the wingnuts, birthers, [...]

REPUBLICANS IN THE NEWS  1:44 pm April 28, 2009

A Children’s Treasury of Wingnut Responses To Arlen Specter Becoming Gay

by Ken Layne

The 14 remaining wingnut Republicans are, of course, furious about Muslin-Communist and Pennsylvania shit monster Arlen Specter doing what they always knew he would do, with the becoming a DemonCRAP, because of course his whole plan all along from the day he was hatched, from a turd, was to stick an Arab Dagger in the [...]

LOPSIDED VICTORIES  9:38 am April 8, 2009

Mike Quigley Is Your New Rahm Emanuel

by Sara K. Smith

It was a nail-biter, folks! Illinois’ 5th District held a special election after Rahm Emanuel left his post to go whisper evil imprecations in the ear of our malleable and naive young king, Barack Obama. Two contenders emerged: Cook County Commissioner and known Democrat Mike Quigley, and the deranged Freeper Rosanna Pulido. Ms. Pulido put [...]

TODAY IN CHICAGO AREA POLITICS  9:42 am April 7, 2009

Exciting Congressional Election Determines Next Rahm Emanuel

by Sara K. Smith

Several months ago Rahm Emanuel left his post in the House of Representatives and temporarily abandoned his ambitions to become the first nine-and-a-half-fingered Speaker of the House in order to crack skulls for Barack Obama. Today, the specialest of all special elections determines who will “fill his seat.”

YEAH WELL JOHN MCCAIN IS A SECRET PANAMANIAN  9:42 am March 4, 2009

Tea Party Shocker: Most Of These People Are Nuts

by Sara K. Smith

Cleveland! It’s a hot town! This guy went to one of them Tea Party protests on Friday, discovered that pretty much everybody there thought Barack Obama was a foreign-born Alien Muslim, etc. You know, the usual. And now a swarm of insane people have flooded comments on the video with actual gibberish like this: “harlem [...]

NOT-SO-SECRET MUSLIM  6:03 pm December 4, 2008

by Jim Newell

PREPARE FOR ULTIMATE RIGHT-WING BLOG HILARITY: “Barack Obama told a group of donors in California early last year that his first international trip would be to Muslim Indonesia, a supporter who was present recalled today… He then said when he got off [Air Force One], he would say ‘xxxxxxxx’ – which we, of course, didn’t [...]


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