freedom
Reddit Being So Mean To Oppressed White Nationalists
Hey, Reddit, we know you like being all free-speechy over there, and that you took forever to close down forums like r/creepshots and then winked and nodded when it re-emerged as “candid fashion police” (haha, close-up pictures of boobs and asses, only with the pretense of mocking the fashion sense of the unsuspecting, non-consenting women [...]
Texas Fertilizer Plant Continues to Express its Freedom
Remember when a Texas fertilizer plant exploded and showered its Freedom all over the town of West, Texas, teaching everyone a much-needed lesson on the uselessness of state regulations? Well the lesson is not over yet, because it turns out that the plant only had $1,000,000 in liability coverage and caused over $100,000,000 in damages.From [...]
Bitter Defeated Ex-Congressman Joe Walsh Explains At Americans That They Are Stupid Losers
Have you missed Joe Walsh (R-Nothing)? No, of course you haven’t, because he is kind of an asshole. But JUST IN CASE someone misses him he has started a group called the “Freedom Movement” and invited people to a townhall meeting so they could watch him wave his arms around and talk about Freedom for [...]
Joe Walsh’s Children’s Long National Nightmare Is Over
Bitter defeated one-term congressman and Father of the Millennium Joe Walsh will finally be able to pay his child support again! Because someone is going to pay him whore diamonds to open his singularly mean mouth and vomit “thoughts” and “ideas” and “accusations that his opponent wears ladies underwear” on our nation’s airwaves! HOORAY! Joe [...]
Hero Patriot Literally Shoots Himself In Foot At Michigan Gun Show
The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a gun, explained NRA strongman Wayne LaPierre earlier this month, is a good guy with a gun. But what can stop a moron with a gun? The answer is a moron will stop himself. With his own gun!
Protesting Now Illegal, Basically
Look at what the freedom-hating Chinese government has done! They’ve gone and passed a law saying that it is illegal to enter a “restricted” area even if you didn’t know that the space was restricted, and also made it illegal to protest in said “restricted” area or do anything that could be “disruptive,” like booing. [...]
Michelle Obama Is Weak On Obesity, Nation Keeps Getting Fatter
Hey there, you might want to put down your Fritos for a second, because this is gross: In 2005, “being obese or overweight caused an estimated 216,000 deaths from heart disease, diabetes and other conditions, researchers estimated, while another 191,000 deaths resulted from being physically inactive.” Do you hear that? If you sit on your [...]
Mormon Glenn Beck Converts America to Catholicism Because…Freedom
Baked potato-wielding beacon of strength and apparent modern-day Sisyphus Glenn Beck has gone symbolically Catholic, despite being a Mormon, in order to stand with freedom-loving Catholics over the contraception mandate that Obama is trying to affix to the health plans of companies affiliated with the Catholic Church. Amusingly, it looks like a great number of [...]
U.S. Soldiers Changing Hearts & Minds By Urinating On Dead Muslims
Everybody supporting the troops a lot? Here they are “finishing the job,” with the primary job being “killing Muslims everywhere” and the finish being “ritually urinating on the bloodied bodies.” Afghanistan, the war that keeps on giving!
Tea Party Now Aiming For The Kiddies With ‘Liberty School’
America’s third-graders are not, generally speaking, overwhelmingly aware of the dangers of socialism. This is unacceptable according to the Tampa Liberty School, a 5-day summer camp designed to wash the political correctness out of children’s tender, pre-liberal minds. There, kids will learn about Thomas Jefferson and Alexander Hamilton, the Federalist Papers, the schools of constitutional [...]
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