Tag Archives: fox news

  Why does he always have to politicize everything?

President Obama Divides Nation, Says Charleston Shooting Involved Gun

President Obama spoke briefly about the church shooting in Charleston that left nine dead, in what the Department of Justice and other authorities are investigating as a hate crime. There’s no official word from the feds on what kind of hate crime, so per Fox News and other rightwing “news” outlets, it’s likely the alleged shooter spewed racist epithets and wanted to take his country back from the black congregation because he was primarily motivated by his hatred of Christians, of all races. Read more on President Obama Divides Nation, Says Charleston Shooting Involved Gun…
  You were expecting something else?

Fox News Condemns Vicious Hate Crime In Charleston — Against Christians

And now this shit
This is something you don’t see every day. Or ever. But the dimwits at “Fox & Friends” are quite upset about an alleged hate crime committed by a white man that left nine people dead in Charleston, South Carolina. (We’d call it terrorism if the suspect were dark-skinned and Muslim, but he’s not, and we all know white men don’t do terrorism.) Read more on Fox News Condemns Vicious Hate Crime In Charleston — Against Christians…
  Show us on the doll where Obama touched Lady Liberty

Wingnuts: Sure, Josh Duggar Molested Kids, But Barack Obama Molested America Way Worse

Are your kids safer with Josh Duggar or with THIS GUY?
Pollsters are hilarious sometimes. Talking Points Memo has the results of a new poll from Public Policy Polling, asking people which do they like better:  The Duggar family, kid-touching and all, or Barack Obama? You will be so shocked to find out that a full 67% of folks who voted for Mitt Romney in 2012 still like the Duggars better than Obama, whereas 87% of Obama voters think Obama is better than kid-touchers and the people who cover for them. THERE’S YOUR PARTISAN DIVIDE, AMERICA. Read more on Wingnuts: Sure, Josh Duggar Molested Kids, But Barack Obama Molested America Way Worse…
  Unfair!

Fired Fox Anchor Will Never Achieve Dream Of Whites, Blacks Hurling N-Word Equally

Boo hoo hoo
Black folks have been enslaved, discriminated against, forced to use separate water fountains, and so many other things over the course of American history, but whew, that’s all over, so there are some white people who would like to get to the REAL racial issue of our day, which is why can’t white people say the word “nigger”? UNFAIR! Tom Burlington was a news anchor for WTXF, the Fox affiliate in Philadelphia, and he lost his job, and a subsequent lawsuit, over his one-man campaign to make it so he could say the N-word, like the blacks do: Read more on Fired Fox Anchor Will Never Achieve Dream Of Whites, Blacks Hurling N-Word Equally…
  but really how DO fuckin' magnets work?

Wingnuts Outraged Juggalos And Fox News Classified As Hate Groups, Except They Weren’t

Not a hate group leader.
When you are a wingnut, you know several things about life: Nobummer is a Muslin; you are NOT EITHER racist; and mean liberals call you a dumb bigot, just because you’re a dumb bigot. They REALLY hate it when the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) classifies one of your extracurricular activities as a “hate group,” when all you’re doing is spreading false, malicious hate against blacks, gays, lesbians, Messicans and others. The great investigative journalist David Neiwert tells us the story of some of these very put-upon wingnuts, getting totally suckered by fake stories about how Fox News and the Juggalos — for the uninitiated, “Juggalos” are the cultish, make-up-wearing, Faygo-drinking fans of the band Insane Clown Posse — were classified as hate groups, except for not. Turn your outrage meter to ELEVENTY: Read more on Wingnuts Outraged Juggalos And Fox News Classified As Hate Groups, Except They Weren’t…
  Give until it hurts.

It’s A Nice Day For A Wonkette Online Baby Shower! Your Weekly Top Ten.

Nothing cuter in the world than the newborn baby burrito. NOTHING.
WONKETTE HAD A BABY, WONKETTE HAD A BABY, WONKETTE HAD A BABY. Hey, did you hear Wonkette had a baby? As you read this, Ms. Donna Rose, daughter of yr Editrix Rebecca and her dashing pixel husband Shy, is on her third full day of being a fully formed, bee-yootiful babby, and her Wonkette uncles and aunt could not be more excited. Read more on It’s A Nice Day For A Wonkette Online Baby Shower! Your Weekly Top Ten….
  Everybody loses

Wingnut Millennial Picks Dumb Fight With Wingnut Boomer On Fox, Hilarity Ensues

Actual screen shot from Fox episode
So this conservative millennial lady who writes for the National Review picked a fight with this conservative boomer fart guy who “reports” for Fox Business Network, about which of their generations are worse. And we are really struggling because who should we root for? Hahah, trick question, we hope they both lose. Let’s see if we get our wish! Read more on Wingnut Millennial Picks Dumb Fight With Wingnut Boomer On Fox, Hilarity Ensues…
  So long farewell aufwiedersehen fuck off

Let’s Remember 11 Times Rupert Murdoch Was A Giant Cretinous Sh*thead

Don't get your old dick caught in the door on the way out.
The day you all feared would come is nigh, Wonkers: Rupert Murdoch is stepping down as CEO of 21st Century Fox and giving the company to his son James, though he will reportedly still be executive chairman of the enterprise and, according to CNBC, will likely “still have the final say on whatever goes on at Fox.” WE KNOW, dry your eyes. So many questions! Will Roger Ailes still have a job? Will Fox News continue to suck so hard? (The answers are “probably” and “definitely.”) Read more on Let’s Remember 11 Times Rupert Murdoch Was A Giant Cretinous Sh*thead…
  New investigation maybe?

What Are Dumb Duggars Trying To Hide Now?

Terrible people
If your family was once famous for making babies all day long, every day, for Jesus, but now it’s known as that sick reality TV star family that covered up the oldest son’s repeated sexual molestation of his kid sisters, you know what you should definitely NOT do? You should definitely NOT refuse to cooperate with a fresh new investigation into your family. But apparently the Duggar Homeschool Textbook of Homeschooling doesn’t cover that. Read more on What Are Dumb Duggars Trying To Hide Now?…
  Um WHAT????

Sarah Palin Goes On Fox To Yell At Fox For Molesting Duggar Girls On Fox

Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.comIs Sarah Palin on drugs? We don’t know, but maybe! We hear Alaska is a great place for scoring meth, to buy with your government hand-out checks from sweet drill-baby-drilled oil profits. And maybe those drugs have eated up the itsy bits of Palin’s brain? We’re just asking, with question marks, which makes it OK to say whatever we want. Read more on Sarah Palin Goes On Fox To Yell At Fox For Molesting Duggar Girls On Fox…
  Won't Someone Please Think Of The HOA?

Wingnuts Outraged Teen In Bikini Forced Hero Cop To Smack Her Around Some

She probably doesn't like crosseyed pegasi in the pool either.
The National Conversation On The Pool Party Gone Awry in McKinney, Texas, took a familiar turn after the first full day of media exposure. Yr Wonkette was astonished to see that on Sunday, even the nine full-time staffers of Twitchy initially condemned the McKinney police officer, now identified as Cpl. Eric Casebolt, for manhandling a 15-year-old girl in a swimsuit. But by Monday night, they had rejoined their readers in worrying about how All The Blacks are blowing this out of proportion, with a scary story warning that the Nation of Islam and the New Black Panthers were joining the growing protests. And thus was order restored to the WingnuttoSphere. Read more on Wingnuts Outraged Teen In Bikini Forced Hero Cop To Smack Her Around Some…
  What would Jesus watch on TV?

Fox’s Favorite Catholic Priest Says Sexual Abuse No Reason To Deprive Duggars Of TV Show

Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.comWhat kind of fair and balanced “news” network would Fox be if it didn’t have its own rightwing whackadoodle Catholic priest on speed dial to pronounce God’s own truth to the half-comatose octogenarian audience? (That’s a rhetorical question.) As Fox’s official “religion contributor,” Father Jonathan Morris is often called upon to explain, in his priestly garb, what Jesus said about slut pills, or how Obama is raping the First Amendment — or, as he did on Tucker Carlson’s Sunday show, why the Duggars should not have to lose their reality TV show just because Josh molested four of his sisters and a babysitter: Read more on Fox’s Favorite Catholic Priest Says Sexual Abuse No Reason To Deprive Duggars Of TV Show…
  temper tantrums

Donald Trump Sharts In Rage At Mean Fox News Bully Charles Krauthammer

Stop bein' such a meanie or he'll CRY.
Donald Trump is a Very Serious Presidential Candidate, and he is pissed right off that nobody on planet Earth seems to understand this. Wednesday, he was bitching and moaning about how the Obama administration doesn’t even want to hear his completely serious, brilliant plan for defeating ISIS. When Greta van Susteren asked him why he wouldn’t share his plan with the world, he said, “Because I don’t want to, GRETA!” He has to keep it a secret for when he’s totally elected president in 2016. Stop laughing, it’s not funny! Read more on Donald Trump Sharts In Rage At Mean Fox News Bully Charles Krauthammer…
  Please Don't Throw Us In The Media Patch!

Megyn Kelly Asks Duggar Girls: Show Us On The Doll Where The Liberal Media Touched You

These people ARE Television
OK, we think we’ve got it figured out, now: Megyn Kelly’s Fox News interview with Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar Wednesday was like the end of the “19 Kids and Counting” franchise, and her follow-up interview with sisters Jill and Jessa Duggar Friday night paved the way for the rumored spinoff series focusing on Duggars: The Next Generation, which is set in the same fantasy universe as the original series but has better special effects. The Daily Banter’s Bob Cesca accurately predicted the overall shape of the interview with this tweet, 20 minutes into the interview: Read more on Megyn Kelly Asks Duggar Girls: Show Us On The Doll Where The Liberal Media Touched You…
  To be fair Millenials ARE the worst

Bill O’Reilly Knows Why Kids These Days Are Stupid And Dumb, And It Is Facebook

News man.
Bill O’Reilly, the world’s greatest news reporter, who has never lied about anything at any time, knows who is stupid, and it is millennials. Why? Because they get their news from these silly sources like The Internet. “Reporting” on a Pew poll that found 61 percent of millennials get political news from Facebook, while others get news from Google News and Yahoo, O’Reilly said, “I don’t know what any of that means.” We know, Bill, it is very confusing: Read more on Bill O’Reilly Knows Why Kids These Days Are Stupid And Dumb, And It Is Facebook…