* The sooner old Al gets the boot the sooner we get Attorney General Patrick Fitzgerald. [Above the Law]
* Fox News reporters in Afghanistan think American soldiers there are “motherfuckers.” [Nitpicker]
* Tomorrow’s concertless anti-war protest will be opposed by similarly music-free pro-war rally, neither of which anyone gives a shit about. [Jawa Report]
* The rambling political thoughts of Donald J. Trump. [The Swamp]
* Bill Clinton bashes the New York Times for using the kid gloves on Obama and the lead-weighted ones on Hillary. [Horse's Mouth]
* But he’s not talking about his brackets. [Freep (2nd Item)]
* Tune into 20/20 tonight for a lispy tribute to Hugo Chavez. [Business & Media]

* Tony Snow is happy to confirm he’s not lying, when he’s not lying. [1115]
* Creepiest media moguls to attend conference in creepiest state for creepiest candidate. [Hotline on Call]
* Smarmy elites chase dandified elites from national political stage. [Political Insider]
* Barry Hussein wins key endorsement from leader of pro-terror voting block. [Election Central]
* Coalition party in Iraq must’ve run out of booze. [The Gavel]
* British troops only being withdrawn so Prince Harry doesn’t have to grow any hair — on his precious porcelain balls. [Breitbart]
* Fox news viewers tune into The 1/2 Hour News Hour to save time. [Comedy Central Insider]

* Fox News is looking to fill the long vacant position of “fact writer.” [Mediabistro]
* Silvestre Reyes is smart, just not relevant-to-national-security smart. [The Volokh Conspiracy]
* Congressman Roger Wicker, whose Mississippi upbringing imbued him with a deep love for opacity in government operations, wants congressional staff salaries off the internetz. [Potomac Flacks]
* Rahm Emanuel did not have awareness relations with those Mark Foley mails. [Unclaimed Territory] MORE »

* James Carville says of Howard Dean: “I would describe his leadership as Rumsfeldian in its competence.” [Window on Washington]
* Jack Abramoff loved Byron Dorgan and Byron Dorgan loved Jack Abramoff. [Say Anything]
* Fred Thompson should replace John Bolton at the UN. His experience in international diplomacy acquired during The Hunt for Red October and the daring Aces: Iron Eagle III missions will serve him well. [World Wide Standard]
* It happened again: actual White House makes error Bartlet White House made in 2004. [Think Progress]
* Tucker Carlson accuses President Bush of being a lightweight partier, says he can only handle, “like three beers or something.” [Media Matters]
* Somebody paid $2 million to Palestinian militants for the release of kidnapped Fox News reporters. Bill O’Reilly thinks it’s a bargain, as it cost him more than that, “to get that bitch to shut up about the falafel.” [World Net Daily]

* John Edwards will use his appearance on The Daily Show tonight to grasp at relevance, announce his candidacy for 2008. [Political Wire]
* Joe Lieberman asks Republicans to hurry up and offer him a committee or something so he can switch parties already. [MoJo Blog]
* Bush Co. planning massive conspiracy to get James Baker in place for a presidential run. The “Cheney fakes heart attack” part of the plan to come any minute. [The Corsair]
* Marine Corps refuses Christmas donation of Jesus dolls, accepts holy warrior Jesus action figures with veins-in-his-teeth chomping action. [ Slice of Laodicea]
* Fox News has no balls. [Michelle Malkin]
* Entire Pataki family failures. [The Politicker]

• Bush unafraid to reveal his manipulation tactics to reporters, they’re slower on the uptake than terrorists. [The Carpetbagger Report]

• When Nancy Pelosi says “civility and bipartisanship,” she means “get medieval on your ass.” [Whiskey Bar]
• Libertarians are kingmakers in Montana, still paupers everywhere else. [The Volokh Conspiracy]
• Fox News blurb-writing done by either a Murdoch or a 7th grader. [Think Progress]
• Massive election gains by Democrats were not by accident, not a result of your favorite conspiracy theories. [Unclaimed Territory]
• Timing of Rumsfeld ouster irks right-side bloggers and GOP candidates that could’ve benefited from that shit happening two months ago. [Captain's Quarters]
• Republicans to pressure George Allen to concede, as they can’t stand his mouth either. [Hotline on Call]
• Jim Webb announces his transition team, for spite. [MoJo Blog]
• Rumsfeld had offered to peace before, but yesterday’s events made it inevitable. [Gawker]
• Ok, maybe the comedians didn’t quite have the Rummy rumor first. But they were close. [theGarance]

• Another nail in Cocktober’s coffin: everyone’s had the Foley emails since June. [Harpers]

• Duke Cunningham breaks out the crayons, scrawls letter to San Diego Union-Tribune. [TPMMuckracker]
• Fox News is preparing to serve their new masters. [MoJo Blog ]
• New anti-Coulter books fuel the hate-filled flattery she thrives on. [GalleyCat]
• Ironically, we only read blogs for the pictures of naked ladies. [Radosh]
• Are Saudis increasing the oil supply to lower prices and help the Republicans? They would, if they had any left. [Outside the Beltway]

• Chris Wallace was in fear of a fair and balanced beat down from Bill “The Mountain” Clinton. [Fishbowl DC]

• Which was a definite possibility considering Clinton was completely wasted. [LGF]
• Venezuelan foreign minister mistakes typical airport security hassles for targeted diplomatic snub, Bolton scoffs. [Atlas Shrugs]
• Bush plans to invade Iran in November, making it neither “October” nor “surprising.” [HuffPo]
• Giant inflatable Bush balloon receives fellatio from British dog at pop show during which no concert-goers understand the metaphor. [Dlisted]
• From dog blowjobs to pig-fucking accusations, there’s a political precedent for everything. [Political Animal]
• Osama Bin Laden: maybe dead, again. [ABC News (Australia)]

• As the clock ticks towards the break for elections, “the most do-nothing Congress in the history of our country” continues to be just that. [NYT, WP]

• Army chief asks for $40 million increase in funding to cover massive shortages in manpower and equipment. [LAT, NYT]
• Comprehensive National Intelligence Estimate document provoking debate on Iraq policy, origin of terrorist fervor. [WP, NYT, LAT]
• FBI still investigating anthrax attacks, learning lots of about science but not arresting anybody, yet. [WP]
• Iraq to stay one country til a least 2008, anybody’s guess after that. [WP, NYT, LAT]
• Bill Clinton appears on Fox News, blasts host, wags finger. [WP]
• Rick Santorum still convinced he has a chance to hold his Senate seat. [NYT]

• Ratings dip at Fox News Channel completely unrelated to Americans’ growing distrust of administration. [TVNewser]

• Roger Ailes knows more war equals higher ratings, orders anchors to “Sell! Sell! Sell!” [Think Progress]
• Why is Joe “committed Democrat” Lieberman trying to ruin the party’s chance to take back the House? For spite, that’s why. [The Carpetbagger Report]
• The Office of National Drug Control Policy might as well roll-up their funding and smoke it. [DARE Generation Diary]
• Ted Steven’s spokesmen issues flimsy denial/lie about the pork hold, as the Senator doesn’t deign to answer bloggers directly, or know what a blog is, actually. [Instapundit]
• Handy new “lie-line” covers history of Iraq War from first bullshit uttered in August 1990 to falsities spread in March 2003. [Mother Jones]
• Paul Begala not happy with the direction of the country, fine with herpes. [Washington Fix]

• At 9:30 tonight, after roughly your 8th beer, the US will have been in Iraq longer than it was in WWII. This is because the Nazis were total pussies. [Ironing The Flag]

• President Bush’s high school report card shows an eager, if unfocused young learner. [McSweeney's]
• More fuel for the debate on whether life in Washington imitates The West Wing or whether The West Wing imitates life. [Blog DC]
• Michael Fitzpatrick (R-PA) has a staffer crash a conference call to pepper his opponent with petty challenges - good thing John Kerry likes watching a campaign implode as much as the next guy. [Fact-esque]
• Air America is still on the air in America, you just have to have America’s most powerful radio to hear it. [WFMU]
• Fox News lets no paranoid conspiracy theory go unreported. [YouTube]
• West Virginia: so shitty even penniless immigrants from the third world won’t live there. [MSNBC]