Tag: foreign policy

Let’s Imagine: Michele Bachmann Advises Donald Trump On Foreign Policy

The helicopter soared over the Minnesota woods like a huge machine designed for that purpose. Inside were Donald J. Trump and his pilot, Golden Pilot, a gold plated human pilot who was very expensive. “Golden Pilot,” said Trump. “Yes, Mr. Trump?”...
Financial model remarkably similar to Trump's

Michele Bachmann Advising Donald Trump On International Policy, Radical Islam, Underpants Gnomes

Michele Bachmann is advising Donald Trump on foreign policy. How's that for a kick in the pants?
How about 'I resign?' No reason, just checking.

Did Trump Campaign Manager Paul Manafort Get Buttloads Of Money From Ukrainian Dictator? Maybe?

Big rumblings in the Trump campaign today in reaction to a New York Times exposé of possible connections between Donald Trump's campaign manager Paul Manafort and corruption in the government of former Ukrainian president Viktor Yanukovych. Unfortunately, this is...
No idea who's responsible for this work of sheer genius. Let us know so we can give proper credit!

Donald Trump Tells Best Bud Vladimir Putin, Sure, Go Ahead And Keep Crimea. You Earned It!

Donald Trump might have said he's considering reversing American policy and recognizing Russia's annexation of Ukraine. Or he might not have understood the question. Does it matter?

Newt Gingrich Wants To Test U.S. Muslims To See If They’ve Caught The Sharia

Is Newt Gingrich getting a little jealous over Donald Trump loving Mike Pence more than him? MAYBE! Perhaps that is why, last night, he got on the teevee with Mike Huckabee and promoted a very Trumpian (Trump-esque? Trumpish?) counterterrorism...

Phil Robertson Wants To Be Trump’s Spiritual Advisor, Has Some Real Neat Ideas

He says we could stop ISIS from killing Americans if only we outlawed abortion!

Donald Trump And Hillary Clinton On French Terrorist Attack: Let’s Compare And Contrast

Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton both chatted with international terrorism expert Bill O'Reilly after Thursday's terrorist attack in France. One of them actually knows something about fighting terrorism.

Donald Trump Explains Bigly Why Immigration Killed All Those Gay People In Florida

Donald Trump explained Hillary Clinton can't possibly support gay people, because she doesn't hate Muslims enough. He said other things that made even less sense, too.

Hillary To America: I Am A Grown-Ass Adult, And Donald Trump Is A Idiot

It's a pity Hillary won't say what she really thinks about Donald Trump.
It's like he's a genius, only the opposite of that.

You Knowed That Stuff Real Good, Donald Trump!

Hollywood Reporter's Michael Wolff profiled Donald Trump, and was amazed to meet someone more self-obsessed than Michael Wolff.

Unifier Donald Trump Will Nuke Our ‘Special Relationship’ With Britain From Orbit

Donald Trump doesn't want your stupid special relationship anymore, Britain! You can just shut your stupid dumb limey biscuitholes!
I laugh at you idiots! So much!

Here’s Your Sexxxy President Barack Obama, Calling Donald Trump A Dumbass

Remember that thing about how one of the main reasons Donald Trump is running for president is because Seth Meyers and Barry Bamz "I'll Dick You Down And You'll Like It" Obama made fun of him during the White...

Fox News Tries To Slay Donald Trump, Gets ‘A’ For Effort

Last night, Fox News surprised the hell out of us. Not by trying in valiant vain to slay the Beast Who Mocks, Donald Trump -- we knew they'd do that. What we didn't expect is that they would employ...
He's kind of a pussy.

Donald Trump Used To Think Iraq War Was Terrific, Just Terrific

Donald Trump has been all over the campaign trail lately, yelling about how he was against that stupid disastrous war in Iraq, that he had said this so many times all the time, and this proves that he will...
He's thinking of ideas right now.

New House Speaker Paul Ryan Has Some Ideas, You Guys!

Fresh-faced dumb baby House Speaker Paul Ryan woked up all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this morning! He did his P90X, said his affirmations into the mirror, and then tweeted out an idea he had been having, about how it would be...
Connect the dots, sheeple!

2015: The Year Anti-Vaxxers Made Measles The New Black

In 2015, science remained a suspicious activity many conservative politicians thought was probably all a leftist plot, with only one Republican presidential candidate willing to say that climate change is real and human-caused. And that guy never had a...