foreign policy
The Solution To Our Troubled World’s Ills: Mitt Romney
After spending Tuesday and Wednesday feverishly blaming Obama for opening the doors of our embassies to al Qaeda and offering them lemonade and cookies with their jihad, Mitt Romney is now advancing his prescription for the world’s ills, which is a healthy dose of Vitamin Mitt. “There’s a pretty compelling story that if you had [...]
Romney Campaign: The Entire Rest Of The World Is A ‘Shiny Object’
For the first time since FDR used his polio-ridden legs to kick the Germans and Japanese in their fascist asses (the Italians, too, but nobody really cares about them when we talk World War II), Democrats have an advantage on foreign policy. This is problematic for the Romney campaign, because a Democrat is in office, [...]
Mitt Romney Considers First Ever Global War Tour!
Whatta we got in the local clip ‘n’ save today? “Mitt Romney’s campaign is considering a major foreign policy offensive at the end of the month that would take him to five countries over three continents…” HMMMMM. You have to wait until you *win* the presidential election to launch world war, dingus. And then it’s [...]
Wingnut Victory: Romney’s Gay Aide Successfully Bullied Out of His Job
Your Wonkette has been too lazy to filter through the daily deluge of homophobic outrage pouring ever forth from the most ferociously closeted segment of the Internet to sift for the conservative hollering about Mitt Romney’s hiring of an openly gay campaign adviser to advise him on that most holy dominion of political manliness, forever [...]
Romney Will Release His Tax Returns When Obama Stops Being A Russian Iranian North Korean Mole
Hey, remember yesterday, when your Wonkette had that story about poor Mitt Romney boohooing because his $100 million retirement account would be taxed at the same tax rate your sister pays on her unemployment check? Yeah, we do too! So now Obammerz’ peeps are all hey mittens, how about you tell us more about that? [...]
Fill In The Blank: John McCain Says U.S. Should _____ Syria
It is now time for your Wonkette Monday Game Post! So: what does war-loving Sen. John McCain think the United States should do about Syria? Negotiate with? Mate with? Appease? Wine and dine? Hug? Kiss? Apply crippling sanctions to? Ignore? Ignore? Ignore? Send aid to? Grundle-pump? Send to private school, basketball camp, or the Applebee’s [...]
Newspaper Editor Suggests Israel Assassinate Obama
Andrew Adler, who owns an Atlanta-based newspaper called the Atlanta Jewish Times, wrote an op-ed last week in which he theorized on what Israel could do about its relationship with the United States vis à vis Iran. As Adler sees it, Israel has three options, and one of them involves “ordering a hit on” President [...]
Rick Perry Continues to Think He’s a Scholar of Turkey
In Monday night’s debate, Rick Perry made the claim that Turkey was “ruled by what many would perceive to be Islamic terrorists.” Just as bafflingly, people from as far and wide as actual Turkey and D.C. have taken time out of their busy days Tuesday to condemn Perry’s par-for-the-course proclamation. But he’s been to Turkey, [...]
Ron Paul Correctly Observes That Newt Gingrich Is Massive Wimp
Remember back when Newt Gingrich was the confident, tuff-talking historarian lecturing anyone in sight on the dire stupidity of their every thought? Times have changed, since fourteen days ago! After having a thorough pout in Iowa, he quickly fled the state in shame and tears before the caucus results had even finished arriving. Newtie tried [...]
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