food stamps
With Nothing Else to Worry About, Congress Cuts Food Stamp Budget
Hey, remember when the economy went to hell and one in ten workers were out of a job and millions of Americans lost their homes? That was awful, but LUCKILY rich people have completely recovered from the Great Recession (and then some!), so Congress is now finally able to tackle the very pressing matter of cutting the [...]
New Poll Shows Americans Like Eating, Republicans Do Not
Don’t you just hate how some Americans are, like, so high-maintenance and needy and addicted to indulgences like eating? Well, if you do, you’re in the minority and probably a Republican and/or member of Congress, according to a new poll from HuffPost/YouGov: According to the new survey, the 40 percent of Americans who want the [...]
Tenn Rep. Stephen Fincher Pocketed $9 Million in Ag Subsidies, Says Jesus Hates Food Stamps
So in our story yesterday on the Congressional debate over just how deeply Jesus wants food stamps to be cut, we missed a tiny detail that is probably worth mentioning. One of the special flowers seeking to slash the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, aka food stamps, was Tennessee Bible-humper Stephen Fincher, who argued against feeding [...]
Congress Argues Over Whether Bible Allows Giving Free Food to Poors
Good news for the 15% of Americans who make up the Poors: Our elected representatives have done a close reading of the Constitution the Bible and magnanimously decided that it’s OK to give a few food stamps to poor people so they don’t starve, but not too many. Of course, it was not an open-and-shut [...]
Hero Oklahoma Rep. Leads Charge To Save Poor From Eating Food
DDM here, drinking an Irish Coffee and wondering how the GOP will find new ways to screw the poors today. I’m new here, and have only been guestblogging for about a week. But I want to submit an entry for Legislative Shitmuffin of the Year (Federal Level Edition). He is my old pal, Rep. Frank Lucas (R-Black [...]
Wisconsin Considers Forbidding Poors From Buying Cheese
Hey, which state hates Poors the most? If you guessed Florida, we’d understand your instincts, but you’d be wrong (today anyway) because Wisconsin is going to prohibit Poors from buying several types of cheese. Yes, cheese. Not “cheez” or “cheez füd” but “cheese,” as in Swiss, Cheddar, and low sodium. (No word yet on cedar [...]
North Carolina Bill Would Require Criminal Background Checks For Food Stamp Applicants, Won’t Even Give Them Guns
It’s pretty darned encouraging to see that somebody is willing to take serious action on crime. And since we all know that crime results from poverty, what better way to reduce crime than by mandating criminal background checks on applicants for food stamps? A bill to do just that is the brainchild of North Carolina [...]
Fox News Very Sad People Aren’t Yelling At People On Food Stamps (More)
Here are Fox News’ Martha MacCallum and Charles Payne talking about the horror of people getting food stamps. They note that despite the “so-called recovery,” there are still a lot of people unemployed, and a lot of people getting food stamps! (They do not mention that the top 1% continue to make out like bandits, [...]
Lamestream Media Hunting Down Poor Michele Bachmann Like Wild Dog
So here is how it went: First Michele Bachmann screeched about how our dastardly Usurper got a total Death to Amerikkka Boner when he murdered our Libyan ambassador in BENGHAZIIIIIII, and then Michele Bachmann told some dumb lies about the five chefs who fly on Air Force One and the “presidential dogwalker” and $1.4 billion [...]
Alabama Sen. Jeff Sessions: Are There No Workhouses?
The Daily Caller has an uncharacteristically non-shitty (we mean, it’s not totally non-shitty, but it definitely downplays the shittiness) story about the number of children who are getting government food assistance. That number is more than one in four, which is a lot of families who otherwise might not have food on them! Reporter Caroline [...]
What Would the U.S. Look Like If It Were a Failed State? Like Georgia, Pretty Much!
Have you ever wondered what the U.S. would look like it if were a failed state? And what sorts of skills you’d need in order to survive, and which government offices would function and which wouldn’t, and which aspects of society would collapse and which would manage to self-sustain? We have too, because it occasionally [...]
In Bout Of Not-Affirmative Action, GOP To Promote Party’s Lone Remaining Black Representative
Rep. Tim Scott (R-SC), who is the Other Black House Republican Besides Allen West, is your newest Senator from South Carolina, after Jim Demint left to grift money at the Heritage Foundation! YAY!!! Many people think that Tim Scott is somehow better because he is more moderate than Allen West, which is sort of like a fried [...]
Bob Dole A Total Communist Now, Apparently
Here is a nice remembrance of George McGovern from his friend, Bob Dole. (“BOB DOLE!”) It is one of those pieces where old men talk about how things were so much better in their day, when after a long work sesh, Tip O’Neill and Ronald Reagan would get together, drink some Cosmos, and go bum-hunting. [...]
Gentleman in Virginia Romney Office Has Novel Idea For Welfare Reform: Execute ‘Illegitimate’ Parents, Adopt Out Their Kids
Clifford Russell, a nice man working in the Mitt Romney campaign office in Bedford, Virginia, has a plan to reduce this awful entitlement culture that we have here in US Amercia. During a visit from freelance writer Christopher D Cook., Mr. Russell expounded on a number of important issues, proclaiming that global warming is “a [...]
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