Gay-for-each-other fecal demons Joe Lieberman and Lindsey Graham are being suuuuuuchhh baaaaabieeesss now that the few decent law-abiding and moral Democrats in the House have promised not to approve any spending bill that would send the sneaky Lieberman-Graham Amendment to the White House, which of course loves it. If you haven’t been following, the “Detainee Photographic Records Protection Act of 2009″ amendment allows the president to legally ignore any court-mandated Freedom of Information Act release of “any photograph that was taken between September 11, 2001 and January 22, 2009 relating to the treatment of individuals engaged, captured, or detained after September 11, 2001, by the Armed Forces of the United States in operations outside of the United States.” NO BUT REALLY. And now Lindsey Graham and Joe Lieberman are threatening to shut the Senate down until this comically fascistic fart-nugget of an amendment saves America. MORE »

Air Force logs and government radar reports released under the Freedom of Information Act reveal that a massive, terrible mystery aircraft barreled through the skies of Central Texas on January 8 — and it was headed for George W. Bush’s Crawford ranch at 2,100 miles per hour! MORE »

With a little push from the Freedom of Information Act, which we all know is pretty much useless once the man strikes all the good stuff, the State Department has released its $1.2 billion Blackwater contract. Out of 323-page document, 169 pages were blank with enough redactions to have it read like a dyslexic’s version of The Anarchist’s Cookbook. One random list simply reads: battery carrier tool, quick booster kit, heavy-duty work bench, distilled water and WD-40. Now, heads will start roll. Blackwater Contracts, Short on Detail [WaPo] MORE »

The Office of Drug Control Policy told the Students for Sensible Drug Policy that they were much too busy locking up Tommy Chong to get to a recent FOIA request, and that they could expect some action on it some time in the year 2207. MORE »

We will never, ever learn how many missing persons are actually buried deep below the Naval Observatory, or perhaps still locked in its dungeon, kept barely alive and in constant pain, partly for organ-harvesting, and partly for mere sport. MORE »

What to do when your FOIA request turns up boring documents? Seize on that most satisfying of criticisms, the typo. As Raw Story has done, delightfully, with Michael Brown’s application to work for FEMA. Below, a sample of Brown’s application (helpful proofreading marks provided by us at no additional cost):

And, hilariously, they did it again on the next page. Simple error? More likely: FEMA’s subconscious demonstration of resentment at losing its independence to a de[a]partment that, while a completely useless and nightmarish bureaucratic cesspool of money, you’d hope has a few secretaries on staff who can proofread these things. MORE »

Abandon hope, all ye who submit FOIA requests to the NSA: MORE »

• Bush, seeking a “rational middle ground” on immigration to rescue his second term, announces the deployment of 6,000 National Guard troops to the southern border; Karl Rove indicates that Bush supports the Senate’s immigration plan. Bush: “We do not yet have full control of the border, and I am determined to change that.” [WP, NYT, USAT, WSJ]
• Immigration issue could go from “opportunity to expand the Republican Party” to a “historic liability”; Bush sought to “define the middle ground in a debate where consensus has been difficult.” 74% of Americans, in poll conducted before the presidential address, supported the use of Guard troops on the border. [WP]
• BellSouth denies “any link” with the NSA for the logging of phone calls; USA Today stands by its story. [USAT, NYT, WSJ]
• Pentagon releases the full list of those detained at Guantanamo Bay after the Associated Press files a FOIA request. [AP]
• Rove is optimistic for the GOP’s chances in November: “Look, we’re in a sour time. I readily admit it. I mean, being in the middle of a war where people turn on their television sets and see brave men and women dying is not something that makes people happy and optimistic and upbeat. But I’m absolutely confident [that] we’re going to be just fine in the fall elections.” [WP]
• Emergency spending bill has yet to be slimmed to Bush’s specifications. [WP]

MORE »

The Center for Public Integrity (something we’re in favor of in an abstract sense, but probably wouldn’t recognize if we saw) got their hands on 900 pages of Michael Brown’s emails during the Katrina disaster. We think a lot of the juicy stuff’s been left out or redacted, but there’s a hell of a lot to sort through, so who knows. Feel free to take a look yourself, and send us anything particularly interesting, but we think the tenor of the thing can be summed up by this one:

(Also fun is the exchange that begins with an email on page 723 with the subject “REDEEM YOURSELF BY SAVING THE ANIMALS IN THE GULF!!” — Brown, a genial sort, responds enthusiastically, leading one to wish someone had emailed him with the suggestion of saving the people there) MORE »