After FIVE AND A HALF YEARS, ALAN Colmes has decided to leave Fox News’ top-rated muppet slappy hour Hannity & Colmes, after twelve years. Alan’s character on this long television series was that of a hapless, lanky liberal — probably a heathen Unitarian! — who was always gettin’ bullied around by his wacky Irish Catholic “co-host,” known oil goblin Sean Hannity. It was like The Odd Couple, except about politics and the Culture Wars. We would like to praise Alan for his selfless portrayal of Fox News’ gay commie foil day in and day out, for which he was paid nothing, except maybe a few millions dollars every year. After the jump, we remember Alan’s shining moment, when he “went rogue” (fought back). MORE »

[Huffington Post]

It is sad to think we will never be here again, at the Xcel Center Hockey Rink, in St. Paul of Minnesota. Ha ha, just kidding. We are so ready to get the living hell out of here! Do you know how long we’ve been covering these two conventions, in two cities 1,100 miles apart? FIVE AND A HALF YEARS. Or 13 days, same thing, really. Let’s liveblog Walnuts McCain giving the speech of, er, the night! MORE »

• We interrupt this “coverage” of the 2008 Democratic National Convention to report that John “Walnuts” McCain, when asked by Jay Leno this evening how many houses he owns, responded in a serious tone, “I spent 5½ years in a prison cell; I didn’t have a house.” It is unknown whether the studio audience laughed in response.