Tag Archives: fisticuffs

  florida of course

This Judge Will Just Stone Cold Beat A Lawyer’s Butt Until He Gets His Way

We really shouldn’t be surprised that the following story happened in Florida, because we have read all the Carl Hiaasen books and we know that Florida courtrooms must be nothing but fever swamps of hostile weirdness, but this tale of the judge who tried to beat up a public defender — and then came back and finish out his daily docket — is weird even for Florida. Read more on This Judge Will Just Stone Cold Beat A Lawyer’s Butt Until He Gets His Way…
  the rally in the valley

Old Bald Liberal Jews Mistake Congressional Debate For WWE Ring (Video)

Brad Sherman and Howard Berman are almost indistinguishable. They are old liberal Jewish Democrats who both voted for the Iraq war (but still try to ding the other for voting for the Iraq war? Come on, guys), and they are both sitting members of Congress representing Los Angeles’s San Fernando Valley. (You remember the Valley from movies like Valley Girl and songs like, um, Valley Girl.) But then a quirk of fate (or the redistricting commission) forced them to run against each other for a newly created seat, and now it is like a comedic Hollywood movie! Yesterday, shortly before Joe Biden raped poor Paul Ryan in his bottom, the two candidates met for some quality get-in-your-facetime, and Brad Sherman basically tried to headlock Howard Berman while shouting at him “YOU WANNA GET IN MY FACE?” and some other stuff, like George W. Bush pretending he was Hud and shouting “You wanna go mano-a-mano old man???” And then an alert copper (we presume he’s a sheriff’s deputy, based on his uniform) was like, you know, I think I will do some keeping of the peace. Gentlemen? Please stop the manhandling. BOO! Read more on Old Bald Liberal Jews Mistake Congressional Debate For WWE Ring (Video)…
 

Insane Republican Voting Official Brawls With Reporter!

Chaos reigned yesterday in Muncie, Indiana after a voter registration deputy viciously attacked a newspaper reporter. The reporter was interviewing a Ball State University student about last-minute voter registration applications when out of nowhere this crazed middle-aged douchebag named Will Statom said something horribly sarcastic to the reporter, so the reporter told him to shut up, and then the FISTS WERE FLYING because that is how they resolve political conflicts in hard-bitten Muncie. Read more on Insane Republican Voting Official Brawls With Reporter!…
 

Crazed John McCain Attacked Rick Renzi With Bare Hands!

Everyone knows that John McCain is a sociopath and a monster who calls his wife terrible things and survives on the fresh livers of babies. But did you know that he also once engaged in fisticuffs with an Arizona Congressman who has now been indicted for various boring corruption-related things? Well he did! And this was just two years ago, so McCain can’t say it was his youthful McNasty temper acting up. Read more on Crazed John McCain Attacked Rick Renzi With Bare Hands!…
 

Bill Clinton Brawls With Obama Nut!

Crazy Bill Clinton got into a full-on crotch-punching brawl, sort of, with a Barack Obama supporter in Northeast Ohio yesterday. Clinton was speaking at Timken High School when Ohioan Robert Holeman started shouting out Obama’s name at random and stepping on Clinton’s applause lines. Then after the speech Holeman approached Clinton to ask him to stop the “bickering” and “name-calling”, and that is when things very nearly almost got out of hand, but did not. Read more on Bill Clinton Brawls With Obama Nut!…
 

Sign, Sign, Everywhere a Sign

So you say the Democrats don’t have any passion? Guess you’ve been hanging out in the wrong districts, then. An intrepid reader reports on a full-fledged ruckus that broke out Wednesday night at a P.G. County congressional debate: Read more on Sign, Sign, Everywhere a Sign…