Tag: first ladies

"And so what happens in this room?"

Making Thanksgiving ‘Monkey Bread’ With Nancy Reagan

Enjoy this Wonkette Holiday Classic recipe all over again, as though The Gipper was still wandering around somewhere. Whatever the hell "monkey bread" might be -- something racist, we assume -- it was the thing our favorite first lady Nancy...
"And so what happens in this room?"

Making Thanksgiving ‘Monkey Bread’ With Nancy Reagan

Enjoy this Wonkette Holiday Classic recipe all over again, as though The Gipper was still wandering around somewhere. Whatever the hell "monkey bread" might be -- something racist, we assume -- it was the thing our favorite first lady Nancy...

It Is Eleanor Roosevelt’s Birthday And We Have Discovered The Best Website Ever

So write a thing about Eleanor Roosevelt, Editrix said, on account of how it is her birthday. We don't really know anything about Eleanor Roosevelt, we said, except that she is cool. Write it anyway, said Editrix. Which is how...

Making Thanksgiving ‘Monkey Bread’ With Nancy Reagan

Enjoy this Wonkette Holiday Classic recipe all over again, as though The Gipper was still wandering around somewhere: Whatever the hell "monkey bread" might be -- something racist, we assume -- it was the thing our favorite first lady...

The Inevitable ‘Who Wore It Best?’ Michelle Obama vs. Ann Romney Smackdown

Before going into too much detail, the answer is Michelle Obama. Always. Unless of course the question is, "Who ate the rest of my french fries?" (The answer to that question used to be The Snowbilly, but now who...

FLOTUS Dangerously Suggests Possible Woman President in 100 Years

Our dear First Lady Michelle Obama was out gardening yesterday, because what else is new? Normally, our FLOTUS just hangs out in her vegetable garden, looking pretty and planting things basically to stick it to a nation that...

Young Turks Kick Callista Gingrich When She’s Down (VIDEO)

Everyone hates Moon Empress and Lizardoid "V" Queen Callista Gingrich, this is not "news." But why? Wonkette's own Jim Newell explained she has never done anything to anyone (we guess Jim forgot about Newt's second wife) and is not...

British Cable News Guy Has To Explain Simple Joke To Newt Gingrich

HRH Sir Piers Morgan of the Shire had amoral chocolate-sucking anus Newt Gingrich on his television show last night to discuss, among other things, Robert De Niro's very controversial joke from an Obama fundraiser the other night: "Callista Gingrich....

Voters Simply Don’t Care For Callista Gingrich, Who Is Not Running For Anything

Why do pollsters do polls about candidates' spouses? They just sort of stand there, on the trail, smiling, and then if the candidate wins they may launch some benign PR initiative, like recommending good nutrition and exercise for children....

Noted Empath Barbara Bush: Compromise Doesn’t ‘Rhyme With Rich’

The students at Southern Methodist University must have played a uniquely terrible prank on some crusty old dean, to be punished with an on-campus "daylong conference on the influence of the nation’s first ladies." Only in Texas could this...

FLOTUS Less Popular Among White Ladies With Poor Self-Esteem

Women in this country are under a tremendous amount of pressure right now, with scaly old men going out of their way and then some to make sure there is absolutely nothing left in place to prevent their personal...

Betty Ford, America’s Rehab Queen, Dies At 93 Years Young

Pretty much everybody loved Betty Ford, who was the nice first lady between Nixon and Carter. She has gone to Heaven now, with Gerald Ford, who died at some point in the recent past. As a video tribute, we...

Palin & Bachmann Have Opinions (!) About Breastfeeding Tax Breaks

Michelle Obama is (still) really grossed out by all the fat people in this country, and she will do anything to make them go away. She will build salad bars in every school cafeteria and throw all the chocolate-chip...

Michelle Obama and Carla Bruni Eat Lunch at the Cool Table

Our FLOTUS has a new right-hand lady! Her name is Tina Tchen, and she is some sort of robot creature who has a giant clock trapped inside of her that prevents her from sleeping. She runs on energy obtained...

Nancy Reagan To Visit White House!

Couch-bound American sweatpants-wearers love to smell their own farts and follow the fashion adventures of their First Lady, which is why they love Nancy Reagan and Michelle Obama equally. Laura Bush? Whatever, she just walked around in stiff light-blue...

Michelle Obama Just Hillary Clinton Minus Pantsuit

Ohhhh the nerve. The new First Lady, having spent two years giving lengthy policy speeches on the campaign trail in support of her husband, is apparently now giving lengthy policy speeches again. This is highly inappropriate behavior for a...