Tag Archives: feminism

  99 Problems And A patriarchy Ain't One

How Are The Feminists Keeping Men From Getting Laid Today?

Guess he taught that cuni a lesson.
Nothing like kicking off 2015 with a few stories about how bad men have it in today’s modern feminist-dominated world, where men are on the verge of being ruined by all these radical feminists running loose and running everything, but still not doing sex to the Men’s Rights Activists for some reason. Read more on How Are The Feminists Keeping Men From Getting Laid Today?…
  Away in a Vatican jail

Topless Lady Steals Jesus, For God

Strip search not needed
via FEMEN So this happened. On Christmas Day, after Pope Francis sang a rousing round of “Happy Birthday, Jesus” from his special balcony on St. Peter’s Basilica, a lady who’d forgotten to put on a shirt that day bum-rushed the crowd of people who’d gathered for the party to steal the little plastic Jesus from the nativity scene, with the words “God is woman” inked on her chest. The woman is a member of FEMEN, a super-radical-even-for-us-radical-feminists feminist group who, as far as we can tell, is taking down the patriarchy by being topless in public. We’re not sure how that works exactly, but the woman who stole baby Jesus was apparently carrying out the group’s “Massacre of the Innocents” campaign: Read more on Topless Lady Steals Jesus, For God…
  The House Of Seven Goebbels

Sundays With The Christianists: Why ‘The Scarlet Letter’ Is Bad For Jesus And America

Of course there's a manga version
It’s Pearl Harbor Day, so what more fitting time to talk about an attack on America? Only this isn’t an attack from some evil foreign empire (redundant, since all foreigns are evil) but from within. As we’re learning from wingnut radio preacher and homeschooling advocate Kevin Swanson, we’re under attack by our very own cultural touchstones — at least those that aren’t the Holy Bible. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: Why ‘The Scarlet Letter’ Is Bad For Jesus And America…
  Thanks a lot ladies

Now It’s The Stupid Feminists Who Killed Michael Brown

The feminists did it, with their feminism
There is so much blame to go around for the death of Ferguson teenager Michael Brown. St. Louis prosecutor Bob McCullough said, when explaining why there was simply no reason at all to indict Officer Darren Wilson, that it was basically social media’s fault for saying things on The Twitters and posting pictures that were obviously not trustworthy because they were only pictures, and who you gonna believe, the cop who killed that kid or some obviously fake photographs? Read more on Now It’s The Stupid Feminists Who Killed Michael Brown…
  #RIPpatriarchy

Hero Dads Who Are Heroes Cook Dinner Sometimes Like Total F*cking Heroes

Sometimes he helps, no, no really
Sure, in old-timey days the women did all the housework and the childcare and the cooking and the shopping and the every other damned thing including the wiping of their husbands’ precious bottoms, but ever since the feminists killed patriarchy — well, it’s stayed pretty much the same. Except for a handful of Hero Dads Who Are Heroes. Get your hankies, folks, because you are going to be soooo moved by this touching tale of dads lifting a finger. Sometimes two! Read more on Hero Dads Who Are Heroes Cook Dinner Sometimes Like Total F*cking Heroes…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Electoral Dysfunction Edition

Wonkette does not allow magic scrolls, either.
Is it Saturday already? Must be time to put on the old Hazmat suit — which we never leave the house without now, on account of the ‘bola — and go skim off the worst of the dumbth in the comment queue for you, our dear readers. It’s an eclectic grab bag of goo this week, but we see that we moved some folks to political activism! Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Electoral Dysfunction Edition…
  department of manliness

Lady Wingnut Has Had It Up To Here With You Being So Mean To Foot-The-Ball

Charlotte Allen's worst nightmare
Here in the Wonkette Los Angeles bureau, we have been enjoying – or rather, “enjoying” – the recent addition to our local paper of the ravings of Charlotte Allen, one of those wingnut writers who constantly complains that women are destroying masculinity in America by making men emotional and dumb … you know, like women. And the latest attempt at feminizing our manly culture, the disparagement of professional football, has really chafed Allen’s nads. Let’s take a look at her caveman gruntings about it. Read more on Lady Wingnut Has Had It Up To Here With You Being So Mean To Foot-The-Ball…
  Not Quite As Nuanced As 'The Gong Show'

Dana Loesch Destroys Feminism Forever, With Hilarious Rightwing ‘Comedy’ Video

It's funny 'cause feminists are fat ugly dykes who hate America!
Here’s a thing that exists! Dana Loesch has a teevee show on Glenn Beck’s cable/internet channel, and she does hilarious rightwing comedy on it! Remember how dumb feminist ladies thought that Jeopardy! was a tad sexist when it suggested that women spend all their time dreaming of a new vacuum cleaner? Well, Dana and her crack team of writers (we assume there are writers?) couldn’t wait to mock how dumb feminists are for hating the family and housework and everything that is right with the world, so they made their very own Jeopardy! sketch, with clues like this: Read more on Dana Loesch Destroys Feminism Forever, With Hilarious Rightwing ‘Comedy’ Video…
  Thanks Obama AND feminists

Feminism To Blame For White House Security Breach, Obviously

At least we can all agree she isn't the best
Photo by Gage Skidmore The White House has had a number of security problems recently — namely, that there doesn’t seem to be much in the way of security. One could argue that maybe the Secret Service is too busy banging Colombian hookers on the job. But White House Security Expert Laura Ingraham (R-Fox News), who used to work at the White House one time with St. Ronald Reagan, so ergo expert, knows the real reason: It is because, like football, White House security is a man’s game that has been feminized and wussified and political corrected, thanks A LOT, liberals. Read more on Feminism To Blame For White House Security Breach, Obviously…
  clipbait

John Oliver Goes Deep Inside Miss America (Video)

John Oliver meets Butt Glue
In yet another terrific piece of longform investigative comedy, John Oliver and Last Week Tonight take on the Miss America Pageant, which likes to promote itself as “the World’s Largest Provider of Scholarships for Women.” Obviously, there are two questions here: 1) Is it still 1959? and 2) Really? Miss America provides $45 million of scholarships a year? There’s also the follow-up question of why anyone seeking an academic scholarship needs to know how to keep her swimsuit snug with butt glue. Read more on John Oliver Goes Deep Inside Miss America (Video)…
  Home Is Where The Penis Is

Women Are Just ‘Penis Homes,’ Says Fired Pastor. RNC Job Offer Imminent.

Another mega-church is closing several branches (they have branches? what the fuck?) because of obvious anti-Christian sentiment over a few flippant remarks Pastor Mark Driscoll made that feminazis are taking WAY out of context. Women … amirite? Back us up, all you god-fearing Wonketeers. Seriously, what’s wrong with this: Read more on Women Are Just ‘Penis Homes,’ Says Fired Pastor. RNC Job Offer Imminent….
  I know you are but what am I?

Fox & Friends: God Hates Feminists

Attention ladies! Do you know what you want, what you really really want? Probably not, so how about you listen to these three hotties – WHOM YR WONKETTE RESPECTS FOR THEIR MINDS AS WELL AS THEIR FEMININITY – yap at you about some feminist idea or other that’s floating through their well-coiffed heads while they show some leg to the geriatric shut-ins who make up the Fox & Friends audience. Read more on Fox & Friends: God Hates Feminists…
  Bring Back Menstrual Huts Too

Phyllis Schlafly Says Just Get Married, Ladies, And End Rape And Violence Forever

Logically consistent since 1964
Veteran riot provocateur Phyllis Schlafly has a simple solution to two problems at once: If women are so all-fired worried about sexual assault and domestic violence, then they darn well better hurry up and get married instead of pursuing a career, since both rape and domestic abuse are caused by women having jerbs. Now, sure, even married men are still animals, but far less so, since a woman’s touch calms them down a whole lot. Schlafly cleared all this up during her weekly radio program last Thursday: Read more on Phyllis Schlafly Says Just Get Married, Ladies, And End Rape And Violence Forever…
  Your morning cup of wut?

Republicans Are Terrible At The Internet, PolitiFact Kills Irony, And Other News You Can Maybe Use

Good morning, sunshines! Want to know what you missed while you were sleeping? Too bad, we’re going to tell you anyway. Republicans are terrible at the internet. TERRIBLE. And now they have a real hip new video game, circa 1981, to really show them Democrats what’s what. And yes, it’s Atari-compatible. We think. Read more on Republicans Are Terrible At The Internet, PolitiFact Kills Irony, And Other News You Can Maybe Use…
  Your morning cup of wut?

Sore Loser Mitt Romney Is Still Sore Loser, Lesbian Feminists Will Destroy Us All, And Other News You Can Maybe Use

Still not president
Yes, it’s Friday. You’re welcome. Sore loser Mitt Romney is still sore loser: “I was not a big fan of the president’s policies, as you know, either domestically or internationally,” Romney said, according to Fox News. “But the results of his mistakes and errors, in my opinion, have been more severe than even I would have predicted.” Read more on Sore Loser Mitt Romney Is Still Sore Loser, Lesbian Feminists Will Destroy Us All, And Other News You Can Maybe Use…