Tag Archives: feminism

  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Electoral Dysfunction Edition

Wonkette does not allow magic scrolls, either.
Is it Saturday already? Must be time to put on the old Hazmat suit — which we never leave the house without now, on account of the ‘bola — and go skim off the worst of the dumbth in the comment queue for you, our dear readers. It’s an eclectic grab bag of goo this week, but we see that we moved some folks to political activism! Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: Electoral Dysfunction Edition…
  department of manliness

Lady Wingnut Has Had It Up To Here With You Being So Mean To Foot-The-Ball

Charlotte Allen's worst nightmare
Here in the Wonkette Los Angeles bureau, we have been enjoying – or rather, “enjoying” – the recent addition to our local paper of the ravings of Charlotte Allen, one of those wingnut writers who constantly complains that women are destroying masculinity in America by making men emotional and dumb … you know, like women. And the latest attempt at feminizing our manly culture, the disparagement of professional football, has really chafed Allen’s nads. Let’s take a look at her caveman gruntings about it. Read more on Lady Wingnut Has Had It Up To Here With You Being So Mean To Foot-The-Ball…
  Not Quite As Nuanced As 'The Gong Show'

Dana Loesch Destroys Feminism Forever, With Hilarious Rightwing ‘Comedy’ Video

It's funny 'cause feminists are fat ugly dykes who hate America!
Here’s a thing that exists! Dana Loesch has a teevee show on Glenn Beck’s cable/internet channel, and she does hilarious rightwing comedy on it! Remember how dumb feminist ladies thought that Jeopardy! was a tad sexist when it suggested that women spend all their time dreaming of a new vacuum cleaner? Well, Dana and her crack team of writers (we assume there are writers?) couldn’t wait to mock how dumb feminists are for hating the family and housework and everything that is right with the world, so they made their very own Jeopardy! sketch, with clues like this: Read more on Dana Loesch Destroys Feminism Forever, With Hilarious Rightwing ‘Comedy’ Video…
  Thanks Obama AND feminists

Feminism To Blame For White House Security Breach, Obviously

At least we can all agree she isn't the best
Photo by Gage Skidmore The White House has had a number of security problems recently — namely, that there doesn’t seem to be much in the way of security. One could argue that maybe the Secret Service is too busy banging Colombian hookers on the job. But White House Security Expert Laura Ingraham (R-Fox News), who used to work at the White House one time with St. Ronald Reagan, so ergo expert, knows the real reason: It is because, like football, White House security is a man’s game that has been feminized and wussified and political corrected, thanks A LOT, liberals. Read more on Feminism To Blame For White House Security Breach, Obviously…
  clipbait

John Oliver Goes Deep Inside Miss America (Video)

John Oliver meets Butt Glue
In yet another terrific piece of longform investigative comedy, John Oliver and Last Week Tonight take on the Miss America Pageant, which likes to promote itself as “the World’s Largest Provider of Scholarships for Women.” Obviously, there are two questions here: 1) Is it still 1959? and 2) Really? Miss America provides $45 million of scholarships a year? There’s also the follow-up question of why anyone seeking an academic scholarship needs to know how to keep her swimsuit snug with butt glue. Read more on John Oliver Goes Deep Inside Miss America (Video)…
  Home Is Where The Penis Is

Women Are Just ‘Penis Homes,’ Says Fired Pastor. RNC Job Offer Imminent.

Another mega-church is closing several branches (they have branches? what the fuck?) because of obvious anti-Christian sentiment over a few flippant remarks Pastor Mark Driscoll made that feminazis are taking WAY out of context. Women … amirite? Back us up, all you god-fearing Wonketeers. Seriously, what’s wrong with this: Read more on Women Are Just ‘Penis Homes,’ Says Fired Pastor. RNC Job Offer Imminent….
  I know you are but what am I?

Fox & Friends: God Hates Feminists

Attention ladies! Do you know what you want, what you really really want? Probably not, so how about you listen to these three hotties – WHOM YR WONKETTE RESPECTS FOR THEIR MINDS AS WELL AS THEIR FEMININITY – yap at you about some feminist idea or other that’s floating through their well-coiffed heads while they show some leg to the geriatric shut-ins who make up the Fox & Friends audience. Read more on Fox & Friends: God Hates Feminists…
  Bring Back Menstrual Huts Too

Phyllis Schlafly Says Just Get Married, Ladies, And End Rape And Violence Forever

Logically consistent since 1964
Veteran riot provocateur Phyllis Schlafly has a simple solution to two problems at once: If women are so all-fired worried about sexual assault and domestic violence, then they darn well better hurry up and get married instead of pursuing a career, since both rape and domestic abuse are caused by women having jerbs. Now, sure, even married men are still animals, but far less so, since a woman’s touch calms them down a whole lot. Schlafly cleared all this up during her weekly radio program last Thursday: Read more on Phyllis Schlafly Says Just Get Married, Ladies, And End Rape And Violence Forever…
  Your morning cup of wut?

Republicans Are Terrible At The Internet, PolitiFact Kills Irony, And Other News You Can Maybe Use

Good morning, sunshines! Want to know what you missed while you were sleeping? Too bad, we’re going to tell you anyway. Republicans are terrible at the internet. TERRIBLE. And now they have a real hip new video game, circa 1981, to really show them Democrats what’s what. And yes, it’s Atari-compatible. We think. Read more on Republicans Are Terrible At The Internet, PolitiFact Kills Irony, And Other News You Can Maybe Use…
  Your morning cup of wut?

Sore Loser Mitt Romney Is Still Sore Loser, Lesbian Feminists Will Destroy Us All, And Other News You Can Maybe Use

Still not president
Yes, it’s Friday. You’re welcome. Sore loser Mitt Romney is still sore loser: “I was not a big fan of the president’s policies, as you know, either domestically or internationally,” Romney said, according to Fox News. “But the results of his mistakes and errors, in my opinion, have been more severe than even I would have predicted.” Read more on Sore Loser Mitt Romney Is Still Sore Loser, Lesbian Feminists Will Destroy Us All, And Other News You Can Maybe Use…
  Dames These Days

NY Post Writer Wonders Why Dumb Broads Can’t Take A Compliment (Also: Nipples)

The New York Post’s Doree Lewak considers herself a funny gal, with her humor recalling a more enlightened time when “gal” was the preferred nomenclature. So we apologize in advance if Lewak’s paean to wolf whistles, “Hey Ladies — catcalls are flattering! Deal with it,” in yesterday’s Post was a new and highly advanced form of satire that we simply don’t understand. We will allow you to judge for yourselves. Read more on NY Post Writer Wonders Why Dumb Broads Can’t Take A Compliment (Also: Nipples)…
  Liberte Egalite Aborte

France To Abort Everyone For Free Now, Pretty Much

Something seems a little off here...
France is enacting a new abortion law that seems aimed at reinforcing every possible rightwing American stereotype of that country, except perhaps for surrendering in a war: It amends the country’s current law, which allows abortion only if a pregnant women can prove “distress.” The new law also bans any attempt to restrict women from getting information about abortion services. The National Assembly voted in January to change the law, despite the country’s Roman Catholic majority. The Minister for Women’s Rights, Najat Vallaud-Belkacem, said during debate that “abortion is a right in itself and not something that is allowed subject to conditions.” Read more on France To Abort Everyone For Free Now, Pretty Much…
  the little scan in the boat

Jon Stewart Finally Addresses Japan’s Pussy Boat Crisis (Video)

Jon Stewart brings us the story of Megumi Igarashi, a Japanese artist who was arrested on suspicion of breaking obscenity laws when she tried to sell 3D printouts of her vulva (let’s be precise, OK?) to help crowdsource a project to build a kayak built from a much larger 3D printout of her ladygarden. Why, yes, it IS Friday. Read more on Jon Stewart Finally Addresses Japan’s Pussy Boat Crisis (Video)…
  I Am Mad About A Thing

Meet The Ladies Men’s Rights Auxiliary!

Don’t you just hate feminism? Of course you do. Feminism is so old-timey and unnecessary and also very mean to men because when women say stuff — like “That sportsball star raped the shit out of me” or “Hey, Mr. Boss Man Sir, why are you paying me less than my male colleagues, HUH?” — it really hurts their feelings. Like, really a lot. Sure, maybe we might have sort of needed feminism, like, a thousand years ago or whenever the first wave of feminism started, who knows, history is a man thing, and I don’t like to crowd my lady brain space with man things because I’m a lady, goddamnit, I’d much rather let men keep track of that stuff so I can focus on SHOOOOOOOOES. But look. We get to vote. We’ve been able to have credit in our very own lady names for a whole 40 years. We have the right to go to doctors (sometimes) and receive Jesus-approved health care (sometimes), and all we have to do is listen to some sidewalk counseling about how we are murdering babies like the baby-murdering whores we are, which is TOTALLY not a big deal at all, so long as those sidewalk counselors don’t try to kill us or our doctors, but hey, if we didn’t want to be killed, we wouldn’t be there in the first place, and you know how freedom isn’t free so it is definitely totally not a big deal at all. Fortunately, for the stupid feminists out there who just do not get why feminism is bad, there is a hot new trend on the internets of ladies fighting against ladies who fight for ladies. Let’s call them the Ladies Men’s Rights Auxiliary — or Lamers for short. Read more on Meet The Ladies Men’s Rights Auxiliary!…
  You Say "Te Deum" We Say "Tedium"

Catholic Mommy Bloggers Explain Why They Don’t Like Or Understand Birth Control

Another good reason to use birth control
A couple weeks back, Buzzfeed posted photos of its employees explaining why they used birth control. It’s a lot of the old, tired “I deserve a say in what happens to my body and my life,” and “I take birth control for my endometriosis” blah-blah-blah we’ve come to expect from the man-hatin’ pro-abortion left. Well, the mommy bloggers at Catholic Sistas weren’t going to take this Buzzfeed thing lying down, if you catch our drift, and we think you do. They posted their own “Why I Don’t Use Birth Control” piece, and it is just a barrel full of monkeys. Read more on Catholic Mommy Bloggers Explain Why They Don’t Like Or Understand Birth Control…