Tag: fema

Irma Gives Trump A Sad. Wonkagenda For Mon., Sept. 11, 2017

Devin Nunes is trying to hide the pee pee tape, the Tea Party doesn't want to help hurricane victims, and George Clooney HATES Steve Bannon. Your morning news brief.

Florida Man: GET OUT. Wonkagenda For Thurs., Sept. 7, 2017

Trump makes a deal, Obamacare repeal crawls back from the grave, and Steve Bannon hates Jesus.

FEMA To Run Out Of Money By Friday. Good Thing No Disasters Are On The Way!

Somebody really needs to explain free-market economics to these unruly hurricanes.
The Titan refugee program was a bad idea, we'll admit

Like A Good Neighbor, Mexico Is There! (Offer Void Where Trump Is President)

Mexico would like to teach the U.S. president something about how grown-up countries behave. Again.

Texas BOAT HEROES Just Being Heroes, In Boats.

The social contract: It works, mofos.

Texas Two-Step: Courts’ Rulings On Districting Fuckery Step To The Side For A While

Before the storm, Texas was facing a political earthquake. Now????

Border Patrol Knows What Is Important During Hurricane Harvey Evacuation: DEPORTIN’ MESSICANS, YEEHAW!

A little old hurricane evacuation is no reason to stop deporting people.

Donald Trump Drops In For Louisiana Flood Photo Op After Governor Asks Him Not To, Because He Cares

Donald Trump went to Baton Rouge to look at the floodwaters, help unload a truck, and sign some baseball caps. Everything's better!
We won't, we promise.

Michigan Gov. Rick Snyder Outraged Feds Let Him Poison Children Of Flint

Raise your glass for Rick Snyder, Michigan's governor from the party of small government and personal responsibility. Now that he's been made aware that state officials have been aware for quite some time that Flint citizens have been drinking poisoned...
It's not even the rust that'll get you, though

Michigan Governor Blames ‘Government’ For Flint’s Poison Water. Um?

Several developments on the water crisis in Flint, Michigan, so pour yourself a nice hot cup of coffee and let's look at what's up now. Unless you live in Flint, in which case you need to pour that shit...
Aww shit, it's from Flint!

Marco Rubio Can’t Be Bothered To Learn About Every Dumb City With Poison Water

You know how it can be when you're running for an important job like president of the United States. There are so many flights and meetings and speeches, you barely know what city you're in. You have to cram all...
Toxic Sludge is Good for You!

Obama Declares A State Of Disgusting In Flint’s Poisoned Water

After the state mismanaged the water crisis in Flint, Michigan, about as terribly as humanly possible, Gov. Rick Snyder finally got his typewriter and stamps together and requested emergency assistance from the federal government. On Saturday, President Obama declared...

Michigan Would Like Flintians To Pay For The Privilege Of Drinking Poisoned Water

When we first started writing about the water crisis in Flint, Michigan, where it was revealed that people were literally drinking state-sponsored poison in the form of lead-addled water, we did not think the story had much legs, as...

George W. Bush In New Orleans: Heckuva Job, Myself!

    George W. Bush returned to the scene of the crime Friday, speaking briefly at a high school that had been flooded during Hurricane Katrina 10 years ago. You will be astonished that his remarks were utterly devoid of self-reflection or...