Tag Archives: fearmongering

  Barack Ebola

Stupidest Men On The Internet: Obama Bringing Africans, Ebola, And Polygamy To America!

It is never the wrong time to panic
Jim Hoft, the Stupidest Man on the Internet, and Kristinn Taylor, the Stupidest Guest Blogger on the internet, have been having a nice pretend meltdown the last couple of days about how Barack Obama is recklessly trying to kill America with the Ebola virus by inviting a whole bunch of Africans — from Africa, the continent that has Ebola — to Our Nation’s Capital for a summit of African leaders next week and a meeting of influential young Africans this week. Not that they’re sensationalizing or anything; they just have articles with judicious, careful headlines that urge a note of caution: Read more on Stupidest Men On The Internet: Obama Bringing Africans, Ebola, And Polygamy To America!…
  loathsome joe

Internet Seeks ‘Off Switch’ For Joe Lieberman

Fearmongering terror toad Joe Lieberman is the worst person in the Senate — not because he’s the dumbest, or the most personally repulsive, but because he has spent the past decade using his supposed “credibility” as a Democrat senator to wage domestic war against the American People. His latest attempt is an Internet Gulag for anyone who types “like a Muslim.” Vinegar Joe wants some button on every blog so all the assholes like him can “flag” and presumably remove anything on the entire Internet that offends Lieberman’s two interests (invading/destroying Muslim countries and bombing all individual Muslims). Read more on Internet Seeks ‘Off Switch’ For Joe Lieberman…
  fail

Not Even FBI Cares About Bloomberg’s Phony Terror Suspect

While #OWS protesters created a “weaponized drum circle” around Michael Bloomberg’s mansion over the weekend, the mayor’s attempt to get people to freak out about the terrorisms was a total failure. Not even the terror-happy federal government was convinced by New York’s lame-o made-up terror suspect. Reuters reports: Read more on Not Even FBI Cares About Bloomberg’s Phony Terror Suspect…
  good job idiot

In Hopes Someone Will Pay Attention, Romney Proposes Killing Medicare

Dull little rich boy Mitt Romney can’t get Republicans to love him, because he loves the Wrong Jesus and also was the creator of Obamacare in Taxachusetts. The news media, meanwhile, will only write about where Herman Cain would’ve liked to stick his dong, and the money he paid to silence the ladies about his unseemly desires. So how can Mitt Romney get “back in the spotlight,” where he’s never really been except as the butt of jokes? By scaring the hell out of The Old People and proposing an end to Medicare! Oh don’t worry, 99% of Americans who will require this health care — Mitt’s going to privatize it! That way, some of Mitt’s favorite people (corporations) will still cash in while you die in the garbage behind the Senior Center. Read more on In Hopes Someone Will Pay Attention, Romney Proposes Killing Medicare…
  no country for old bigots

Islamophobe Nuts Decry Sharia Takeover of Nashville Hotel

The vicious professional Muslim-haters of the anti-religious freedom organization “Preserving Freedom Conference” were all set to make their pretty pennies holding a sweaty, paranoid circle jerk for Islamo-fear fetishists at the Hutton Hotel in Nashville, but the mean venue owners canceled their booking contract after they realized it might be bad for business to be seen hosting a gathering of feverish bigots. This, of course, can mean only one thing: BLAME THE SHARIA WITCH MAGIC, and organizers promptly declared the hotel under the spell of Allah’s oppressor demons.  Read more on Islamophobe Nuts Decry Sharia Takeover of Nashville Hotel…
  not leftist enough

WSJ Surveys #OWS, Finds Dangerous Radicals (Meaning, Democrat Voters)

Here’s a pre-tangled mess of shitty intestines to unravel: Michael Bloomberg’s pollster arranged a survey of the Occupy Wall Street campers and published his paranoid/fearmongering results in the Wall Street Journal. The pollster/WSJ columnist, Douglas Schoen, then objectively described the #OWS protesters as “dangerously out of touch with the broad mass of the American people” and said the protesters are all “bound by a deep commitment to radical left-wing policies.” This proves something, probably about Obama, and even if the results of the survey are completely contrary to Schoen’s pre-written conclusions. Read more on WSJ Surveys #OWS, Finds Dangerous Radicals (Meaning, Democrat Voters)…
  happy 9/11 month

Drone Terror Attack Thwarted Because Only Pentagon Is Allowed To Do That

What could be wrong about a robot-drone plane raining death and destruction upon the Enemy? Everything, when a Muslim wants to do it! (Otherwise, this is called “10 years of U.S. war in Afghanistan.”) Somehow, the FBI found an angry young Islamic dude in America who was, for some reason, angry about the endless murder of Muslims committed by the U.S. Department of Defense under orders from the Defense Contractors and their primary lobbyists, the U.S. Congress. And then the FBI did the usual thing of giving this dude a bunch of “fake” military explosives and assault weapons, so they could arrest him for having these things they just gave him, so they could say, “Terror Averted! (Please double our anti-terrorism budget, for freedom.)” Read more on Drone Terror Attack Thwarted Because Only Pentagon Is Allowed To Do That…
  war is peace is war

Allen West Hopes To Reform Islam With His Constant Insults To Muslims

The military apparently taught Allen West conflict resolution real good, since his latest grasping ploy to end 9/11 amounts to telling Islam (which did 9/11) more loudly that Allen West does not care one bit for 9/11 (which did Islam). Here is Allen West talking at an event he hosted in Florida to promote an anti-ground zero mosque movie 365 news cycles too late: “I think we need to recognize some of the ideological differences that separate us, and if you want to get to a point of having peaceful coexistence, I think it’s where they need to reform some of these things.” Thanks for that, Allen West, “they” will get right on these “things,” whoever “they” are. Is everybody friends yet? Read more on Allen West Hopes To Reform Islam With His Constant Insults To Muslims…
  sob stories

Libtard Victory: Fearful Glenn Beck Moving Away From New York

Uh, New York hippie gangs win! The giant fire-breathing progressive lynch mob that tried to murder Glenn Beck and his family in Bryant Park made them decide to get the hell out and not wait to be eaten. Like in the zombie movies! So they are moving to Texas to live in a suburban gated community full other fearful rich white idiots, as God intended. Why would someone like Beck want to ever live near a socialist cesspool like New York to begin with? Read more on Libtard Victory: Fearful Glenn Beck Moving Away From New York…
  happy b-day! the president is black!

Old White People Enjoy Scary Obama Birthday Cards

It’s bad enough that most white people in America are poor and old and downsized out of a real job and denied retirement and forced to labor as a “temp” or “seasonal employee” at WalMart or McDonald’s until death. There’s also a colored fellow in the White House! Luckily, America’s drug stores have lots of wacky/terrifying Obama novelty greeting cards for the olds to look at while they’re picking up their prescriptions. Read more on Old White People Enjoy Scary Obama Birthday Cards…
  a nation challenged

America Under Attack: Terror Birds Dropping Like Bombs

What will the Terror Threat Level Alert-bot tell us today, about the challenges we all face? Ever since the Nobama Administration’s WONK-bot TSA-1138 began these video updates yesterday, we’ve all become much safer and much more terrorized, simultaneously. For example, did you know that ALL THE BIRDS are falling out of the sky, as bombs, and all the fish are becoming “river bombs” and that goofy book The Road is starting to become more scientifically plausible by the hour? (How unlikely did it seem that all the plants and animals and whatever would die, but some hillbilly and his autistic kid would miraculously survive, along with gangs of hair-metal rapists who ate only … hillbillies? Anyway, totally realistic now.) Read more on America Under Attack: Terror Birds Dropping Like Bombs…
  our fragile nation

Homeland Security Deputizes All WalMart Shoppers To Stop Terrorists

While standing (or riding a Rascal) in line at WalMart behind a massive shopping cart full of huge novelty popcorn containers and corn syrup buckets this holiday season, America’s defeated shoppers will get a very special message from the nice lady at Homeland Security. Apparently stung by criticism that she’s only dedicated to humiliation and child abuse at the nation’s airports, Obama’s domestic terror chief Janet Napolitano has ordered this charming video be played on continuous loop at every WalMart checkout in America. What does she want the WalMart shoppers to do, after they swipe their EBT cards in exchange for baby formula and Choco Puffs? Read more on Homeland Security Deputizes All WalMart Shoppers To Stop Terrorists…
  black friday

Happy Holiday Bargain Day!

On this Holy Day of going to the Big Box stores and outlet malls to use up whatever’s left of the American Consumer’s shrinking credit line, as a permanent jobless/starving class approaches one-fourth of the entire population and constant economic fear is the standard emotion for all but the richest 5%, what are Washington’s concerns? Preserving very low tax rates for the very richest Americans, spending hundreds of billions losing wars against nobody in places like Afghanistan, and the institutionalized harassment of people who can still afford tickets on the nation’s commercial airlines. Did you give enough thanks for all this, yesterday? Read more on Happy Holiday Bargain Day!…
  institutional frailty

‘One or Two’ Passengers Can Wreck Entire TSA, Apparently

You might think a nationwide workforce so well-trained in stealing iPods and loose change would be able to withstand a few “nah I don’t want to get cancer” opt-outs, but that is not the case! The government’s finest child-molesting force is so fragile and worthless that “just one or two recalcitrant passengers at an airport is all it takes to cause huge delays,” according to the American Society of Travel Agents. Gosh, sounds like this country is screwed. Read more on ‘One or Two’ Passengers Can Wreck Entire TSA, Apparently…
  lock her in the backscatter

If Hillary Clinton Ever Flies Commercial, She’ll Murder TSA

War monster Hillary Clinton was asked why the American Government now spends most of its resources sexually assaulting little children and humiliating cancer survivors in the nation’s airports. She said it’s totally necessary, for freedom, because as long as the American Government spends the rest of its resources bombing the shit out of Muslims all over the world, furious Muslims will very occasionally try to blow up something in America. And America has no intention of ever stopping its wonderfully successful international mission of blowing up Muslims everywhere — so the best way to do “intelligence screening” is to have high-school dropouts force U.S. citizens into dangerous cancer machines and stroke the tiny innocent genitalia of American pre-school children. Also, ha ha, like Hillary Clinton is ever going to fly commercial! Read more on If Hillary Clinton Ever Flies Commercial, She’ll Murder TSA…
  fight the porno cancer tsa

TSA Says It’s ‘Irresponsible’ To Legally Opt-Out of Porno-Cancer Scanners

Oh lookee, the nation’s primary employer of high-school dropouts stealing your laptop and feeling up your 13-year-old daughter in airport security lines now says it’s “irresponsible” for you to opt-out of being stuck into a dangerous radiation chamber that produces x-ray porno pictures of Americans paying hundreds or thousands of dollars to fly on a plane. The Washington Post and CNN are among the mainstream media organizations now reporting on the nationwide backlash against TSA’s insane, dangerous and morally reprehensible groping and porno-tubing of American air travelers. And the TSA doesn’t like that! Read more on TSA Says It’s ‘Irresponsible’ To Legally Opt-Out of Porno-Cancer Scanners…
  earth vs. the machines

Fight the TSA’s Child Porn Airport Death Machines, November 24!

Guess who’s pushing for these radiation/porn camera tubes in every airport, to first debase you and then kill you with cancer? Hollow-eyed death monster Michael Chertoff, former director of Homeland Security! He’s now a lobbyist for the death-porn humiliation chambers, which is why it’s very important to security — his financial security — that you be subjected to outrageous doses of deadly radiation while the TSA’s obese high-school dropouts masturbate to x-ray jpgs of your breasts and/or penis. But on November 24, you can defeat Michael Chertoff, the undead spawn of Moloch. Read more on Fight the TSA’s Child Porn Airport Death Machines, November 24!…
  every day is 9/11 forever

Fuck You, Nigerian Would-Be Plane Blower-Upper

The ’00s have been an absolute disaster, a foul decade that started with George W. Bush running for president, was defined by his administration’s moral/financial bankrupting of America in the name of 9/11, and ended with the last of his idiot constituency wearing olde-colonial pirate hats while making YouTube rants about the new president being ineligible for office, because he’s a negro. Read more on Fuck You, Nigerian Would-Be Plane Blower-Upper…
  never forget

Will Obama Steal 9/11 From Wingnut Death-Porn Arab Haters?

Not since the Grinch stole Jesus’ Birthday from the tiny hydrocephalic aliens of Whoville has a figure of evil so blatantly tried to fuck a precious holiday to death: Barack Obama wants to make September 11 some kind of evil, patriotic day of remembering the terrorist attacks by doing something for America. It is exactly like he individually piloted all of those jets into those buildings, and knocked them down! Read more on Will Obama Steal 9/11 From Wingnut Death-Porn Arab Haters?…
  dick cheney

Ugh, How Did We Survive EIGHT YEARS of This Creep?

Good christ but this guy is a terrifying shit-monster — a leering death clown who is supposed to go away, but cannot, because he is the world’s biggest asshole. Thanks, Dick Cheney, for reminding us how to hate again. Here are the main lies from his foul hymn to Satan today. [Talking Points Memo] Read more on Ugh, How Did We Survive EIGHT YEARS of This Creep?…
  pig death flu fear

Travel Industry Wants To Kill Joe Biden

Famous talky-mouth Joe Biden is always plotting against us, except for part of this week when he was a Hero for talking so much to Arlen Specter that Specter had enough and said, “Okay, Jesus fucking Christ, Joe, whatever, I’ll be a Democrat. I’ll be a fucking Scientologist Mel-Gibson Catholic Turkish Imam if that’s what it takes for you to shut up.” And then we, as a nation, said, “Well Biden is good for something after all.” But then he spoke today, about something else — PIG DEATH FLU PANDEMICS — and now the travel industry wants him to apologize and then die. Read more on Travel Industry Wants To Kill Joe Biden…