Feds Nix Dix Six
Tuesday, May 8th, 2007
The FBI has successfully broken up yet another fiendish terrorist plot on American soil. These brave defenders of freedom have once again ensured that Americans can rest easy, safe from the threat of a couple guys buying some guns and trying to… take over an Army base??? MORE »
The FBI has successfully broken up yet another fiendish terrorist plot on American soil. These brave defenders of freedom have once again ensured that Americans can rest easy, safe from the threat of a couple guys buying some guns and trying to… take over an Army base??? MORE »
The Following Congressmen Will All Be in Jail By the End of the Term
Tuesday, April 24th, 2007
Today’s Politico features a list of congress members currently under investigation for various complicated crimes. In order to help you understand how much trouble these members may be in, we’ve summarized the key facts about each of their cases, after the jump.
Today’s Politico features a list of congress members currently under investigation for various complicated crimes. In order to help you understand how much trouble these members may be in, we’ve summarized the key facts about each of their cases, after the jump.
If You Are a Republican Congressman, the FBI Would Like a Word With You
Friday, April 20th, 2007
Rick Renzi, who was once Jack Abramoff for a couple minutes (and whose finest moment is still this) joined fellow Congressman John Doolittle in the “my shit got raided” club yesterday. MORE »
Rick Renzi, who was once Jack Abramoff for a couple minutes (and whose finest moment is still this) joined fellow Congressman John Doolittle in the “my shit got raided” club yesterday. MORE »
Doolittle Raid Causes Journalists to Fall Into Hole in Time-Space Continuum
Wednesday, April 18th, 2007
Hey, John Doolittle’s house was raided by the FBI last Friday! As usual, the gears of justice have turned quickly and decisively in dealing with the crooked lawmakers who enabled Jack Abramoff. MORE »
Hey, John Doolittle’s house was raided by the FBI last Friday! As usual, the gears of justice have turned quickly and decisively in dealing with the crooked lawmakers who enabled Jack Abramoff. MORE »
Happy MLK Assassination Day!
Wednesday, April 4th, 2007
As Bono taught us, wrongly, Martin Luther King was assassinated in the “early morning, April 4″ of 1968 — 39 years ago today. (It was actually 6:01 p.m. There was no Wikipedia back then, so at least he got the date right.) Today is the real Martin Luther King Day. MORE »
As Bono taught us, wrongly, Martin Luther King was assassinated in the “early morning, April 4″ of 1968 — 39 years ago today. (It was actually 6:01 p.m. There was no Wikipedia back then, so at least he got the date right.) Today is the real Martin Luther King Day. MORE »
Daily Briefing: Delivery Of The Sphere
Monday, April 2nd, 2007
* Democrats going to the mat with White House over “encroachments on privacy and civil liberties.” [WP, WSJ]
* Hillary Clinton is the undisputed world heavy weight champion of getting paid. [WP, NYT, LAT]
* Al-Qaida just as good as new. [NYT]
* Hopefully Tommy Thompson is in Iowa for his health. [WP, NYT]
* Recording interviews with suspects is a “non-starter” with the FBI. Illegal use of surveillance and bungling of cases still fine, obv. [NYT]
* Nevada governor Jim Gibbons is “a fast-motion train wreck.” [WP]
* President Bush will not be throwing out the first pitch at the Nationals home opener this afternoon as both the team and the White House worry about being associated with such a loser. [WP]
* Democrats going to the mat with White House over “encroachments on privacy and civil liberties.” [WP, WSJ]
* Hillary Clinton is the undisputed world heavy weight champion of getting paid. [WP, NYT, LAT]
* Al-Qaida just as good as new. [NYT]
* Hopefully Tommy Thompson is in Iowa for his health. [WP, NYT]
* Recording interviews with suspects is a “non-starter” with the FBI. Illegal use of surveillance and bungling of cases still fine, obv. [NYT]
* Nevada governor Jim Gibbons is “a fast-motion train wreck.” [WP]
* President Bush will not be throwing out the first pitch at the Nationals home opener this afternoon as both the team and the White House worry about being associated with such a loser. [WP]
Daily Briefing: These Colors Run
Wednesday, March 28th, 2007
* Senate sounds “the bugle of retreat” by setting “the date certain for surrender” and “mandating failure.” [WP, NYT, LAT]
* Tony Snow isn’t as much of a man as Elizabeth Edwards. [WP, WP, NYT, LAT]
* More like Federal Bureau of Incompetence. [WP, NYT]
* Driven mad with power, Barbara Boxer tries to revive a 1923 equal rights amendment. [WP]
* It sucks to be Dennis Hastert right now. [NYT]
* Military not a fan of the internet, wants l33t hax0rs to shut down terrorist sites. [USAT]
* It’s not just the American people, even other tyrannical world leaders are sick of President Bush. [WP]
* Senate sounds “the bugle of retreat” by setting “the date certain for surrender” and “mandating failure.” [WP, NYT, LAT]
* Tony Snow isn’t as much of a man as Elizabeth Edwards. [WP, WP, NYT, LAT]
* More like Federal Bureau of Incompetence. [WP, NYT]
* Driven mad with power, Barbara Boxer tries to revive a 1923 equal rights amendment. [WP]
* It sucks to be Dennis Hastert right now. [NYT]
* Military not a fan of the internet, wants l33t hax0rs to shut down terrorist sites. [USAT]
* It’s not just the American people, even other tyrannical world leaders are sick of President Bush. [WP]
Daily Briefing: Being There
Tuesday, March 27th, 2007
* Senate Republicans hope John McCain shows up to work so they can avoid a veto of the Iraq funding bill. Please note that we didn’t take the easy “soften stance on pullout” headline joke. [WP, NYT]
* Gonzales’ aide invokes her “fifth amendment right” while taking “an indefinite leave of absence.” We’ve come a long way as a society — a few years ago she just would’ve been “disappeared.” [WP, NYT]
* FBI so excited about their new anti-terrorism powers they’re doing donuts in the nations’ personal information parking lot. [WP]
* First Guantánamo detainee actually found guilty, entered the plea himself, and is Australian. Swarthiest possible actors will continue to be cast for every “bad guy” movie role, however. [WP, NYT, LAT]
* David Stockman is thankful there aren’t any emails to dig through from the Reagan administration. [WP]
* Lawrence Small tells Smithsonian board of regents they can take his job and shove it into a jewel encrusted urn. [WP]
* Jim Webb tells Capitol police they can take his gun from the cold, dead hands of his aide. [WP]
* Senate Republicans hope John McCain shows up to work so they can avoid a veto of the Iraq funding bill. Please note that we didn’t take the easy “soften stance on pullout” headline joke. [WP, NYT]
* Gonzales’ aide invokes her “fifth amendment right” while taking “an indefinite leave of absence.” We’ve come a long way as a society — a few years ago she just would’ve been “disappeared.” [WP, NYT]
* FBI so excited about their new anti-terrorism powers they’re doing donuts in the nations’ personal information parking lot. [WP]
* First Guantánamo detainee actually found guilty, entered the plea himself, and is Australian. Swarthiest possible actors will continue to be cast for every “bad guy” movie role, however. [WP, NYT, LAT]
* David Stockman is thankful there aren’t any emails to dig through from the Reagan administration. [WP]
* Lawrence Small tells Smithsonian board of regents they can take his job and shove it into a jewel encrusted urn. [WP]
* Jim Webb tells Capitol police they can take his gun from the cold, dead hands of his aide. [WP]
Daily Briefing: Pride Only Hurts
Friday, March 9th, 2007
* Waning paranoia about the Patriot Act goes back up to “red” as the FBI is cited for surfing Americans’ personal information like you surf for porn. [WP, NYT]
* If an Iraq War spending plan gets rewritten a thousand times, then vetoed, will Nancy Pelosi cry on teevee? [WP, NYT, LAT]
* Alberto Gonzalez has never met a shady “fire ‘n replace” scheme he didn’t like. Arlen Specter has never met an Attorney General that he did like. [WP]
* Chuck Hagel asks John McCain, “Must you betray me with a kiss?” [WP]
* “Bush Doctrine” of suspicious first-punch throwing will influence the next President, whoever she is. [WP]
* Morally unassailable poor kids’ health insurance program woefully under funded. [USAT]
* Newt Gingrich: hate him for the hypocrisy, love him for the skirt chasing. [AP]
* Waning paranoia about the Patriot Act goes back up to “red” as the FBI is cited for surfing Americans’ personal information like you surf for porn. [WP, NYT]
* If an Iraq War spending plan gets rewritten a thousand times, then vetoed, will Nancy Pelosi cry on teevee? [WP, NYT, LAT]
* Alberto Gonzalez has never met a shady “fire ‘n replace” scheme he didn’t like. Arlen Specter has never met an Attorney General that he did like. [WP]
* Chuck Hagel asks John McCain, “Must you betray me with a kiss?” [WP]
* “Bush Doctrine” of suspicious first-punch throwing will influence the next President, whoever she is. [WP]
* Morally unassailable poor kids’ health insurance program woefully under funded. [USAT]
* Newt Gingrich: hate him for the hypocrisy, love him for the skirt chasing. [AP]
