Wonkette

It’s summertime and the living is terrible.

Would you enjoy a Top Ten List of all the apocalyptic current events proving this is the End of America and probably The World? We thought you’d like that, you elitist doom-porn scumsacks. MORE »

* Hate crime legislation makes Jesus cry. [Traditional Values Coalition via Pandagon]
* Mike Huckabee’s son busted for carrying a handgun and at least 50 extra pounds through the Little Rock airport. [Radar]
* Iraqi government spokesman Dan Bartlett not happy about the timeline bill. [The Left Coaster]
* And neither is Joe “I Hold Harry Reid’s Life In My Hands” Lieberman. [GOP Bloggers]
* Paul Begala is so fucking pissed at that “gasbag” David Broder. [HuffPo]
* Sam Brownback’s in the closet … on immigration. [Hit & Run] MORE »

* Senators refuse to confirm George Casey as Army chief until he tells them where he gets the good happy drugs. [WP, NYT, LAT]
* The “unpleasant but very detailed” 90-page National Intelligence Estimate on Iraq goes to Congress. The 2 pages you’re allowed to see will be podcasted. [WP]
* If you give money to poor people you have to give it to rich people too, this is America, everything has to be equal. [WP, NYT]
* Yes, the Senate is still talking about their, “Mr. President, don’t send more Americans into the middle of civil war!” resolution, letter, email whatever. [NYT]
* Only the brain-dead pay the death tax. [WSJ]
* New Iraq “casualty” count only reflects soldiers who were shot at, not who shoot themselves. [NYT]
* United Nations to world: Global warming, it’s real. [LAT]
* President Bush to nation: no fatties. [WP]

* Which President has spent the most time talking about Pearl Harbor? Hint: It’s not Franklin Roosevelt. [Lawyers, Guns and Money]
* Buy two regular price blowjobs from DC hookers and they’ll keep your secret for free. [TPM Muckraker]
* President Bush wants a cookie for some shit he was supposed to do anyway. [Hotline on Call]
* DHS program that assigns “secret terrorist ratings to millions of U.S. citizens,” gets highest possible “Five Kafkas” for its scary PoMo essence. [Computerworld, The Heretik]
* Walnuts McCain hires a communications director even Wal-Mart thinks is too evil. [Election Central]
* Some people just have to be first: “Top Ten Funniest Political Moments of 2006.” [Extreme Mortman]
* On Oscar night, pay close attention to the size of Al Gore’s ass — that’s how you’ll know if he’s running in ‘08. [SFGate]

• Reliable Source: Rep. Jim Moran lost 46 pounds and won reelection… The Ritz-Carlton has created a drink for our departing SecDef: The “Rum Rummy Rum,” made from three ounces rum, one ounce Grand Marnier, sour mix, ginger ale, and psychopathy. [WP]
• Yeas and Nays: No one got any sleep Tuesday night. Chuck Todd stayed up all night — dude, hook us up… Democrats also now best golfers on the Hill… Pat Buchanan regaled Nathans with the story of being duped by Ali G. [Examiner]

Time for your weekly look at the life of leisure that is a gig on Capitol Hill. This week, your questions were all indicative of creepy anti-social tendencies and our Anonymous Hill Staffer’s answers were all sorta mean. You guys were meant for one another.

After the jump: competitive eating, pornography, intern ass, and the Secret Service. You know, typical fare.

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