Tag: fast and furious

Did somebody say spandex?

Kansas To Give Gun Dealers Special Rights Like They’re A Bunch Of Gays Or Something

Thank Christ Kansas Gov. Sam Brownback and his team of merry Republican legislators have fixed the budgetary crisis they created, and now have time to move on to the important issues. It's time to ban discrimination against poor, helpless,...
Obama's magazine cover JUST KIDDING LOL

Wingnuts: Sure, Josh Duggar Molested Kids, But Barack Obama Molested America Way Worse

Pollsters are hilarious sometimes. Talking Points Memo has the results of a new poll from Public Policy Polling, asking people which do they like better:  The Duggar family, kid-touching and all, or Barack Obama? You will be so shocked...
We'll always have reindeer

Reindeer-Farming Congressman Acts Sane, Counters With Impeachment Bill

Wonkette readers have been kept well-informed about reindeer-farming Michigan congressman Kerry Bentivolio -- from before he even officially won his 2012 election, when this site identified him as a potential heir to Michele Bachmann's Krazy Krown, to the raving...
KKKlassy

These Real Patriotic Americans Just Want To Hang Obama From A Tree Is All

Everyone knows that it was Jesus who wrote the Constitution, and what better way to exercise your biblical rights to petition your government than to gather half a dozen like-minded 'Mericans outside the White House to have a good...
Portrait of a man looking forward to a nice university president job

National Review Online Really Wants To Read Eric Holder Word-Sexing His Wife

Eric Holder, who is kind of a jerk sometimes and is pretty great other times, is in some sort of lawsuit or something because Fast & Furious Ebolagate Solyndraghazi. But did you know he has claimed he shouldn't have...

Please Fund Our Kickstarter To Send Mike Huckabee To North Korea, Where He Can Be Free

Do you dig Mike Huckabee? Who doesn't, really? If you do, you'll definitely be into his speech at the Conservative Value Freedom Summit God Bless America Property Rights Jamboree thing over the weekend, sponsored, of course, by Citizens United...

Attorney General Eric Holder Continues War Of Wits With Unarmed Louie Gohmert

Just a day after Louie Gohmert's passive-aggressive snottiness toward him in a House hearing, Attorney General Eric Holder subtweeted the Texas Republican in a speech Holder gave to the National Action Network. On Tuesday, Gohmert had suggested that...

No Fair — How Can Darrell Issa Leak Obamacare Website Security Info If HHS Won’t Trust Him?

When we first read this article about notorious cosmic dingleberry Darrell Issa (R-Satan's Bunghole), we seriously had a newsgasm. After cleaning up our computer screen, we have been laughing ever since, because... well, this is just so awesome, even...

Darrell Issa Gets Dressed Down By Federal Court Judge For Being Stupid, Arrogant Whiny-Baby

If you woke up this morning and thought that there was a foul odor wafting through the universe, your senses were not deceiving you. Cosmic skidmark Darrell Issa (R-CA) is back in the news. This time it’s about his...

Hitherto Undiscovered Wingnut Sarah Hoyt Makes Strong Wonkette Debut With Kirk Douglas Fanfic

Folks, we are pleased as punch to introduce the newest member of yr Wonkette family, a brand new bouncing baby wingnut named Sarah Hoyt. She's picture perfect right out the gate. Robert Heinlein quote? Check. Distressingly aged homemade website?...

Totally Sane Congressman: Obama Is Hiding Benghazi Witnesses Away, Probably In FEMA Camps, Why Not

We here at this little mommyblog sometimes take issue with the wingnut wing of the Republican Party, what with their scandal-non-scandals, hyping of misinformation, and the occasional outright lie because of deep-seated racism surface-level racism being awful human beings....

Allen West Is Surrounded By Racists And They Are All Black Congressmen

Congressman Allen West hates it when black people play the race card. Hates it so much, that when they play it, he plays it right back, just to show 'em. He's the one who first put forward that Obamacare's 10-percent...

Watch This Congressional Fellow Yelling Fast And Furiously About The Rule of Law And Whatnot

What is Congressman Trey Gowdy (R-SC) yelling about today? And if that name seems familiar, it is because he was in the news about a year ago for comparing same sex marriage to incest and on Fox "News" a...

CNN Typist LZ Granderson Simply Does Not Care For Investigative Reporting

Americans are so NOSY, you guys, what with their unrelenting interference in Vice Presidential matters and this bizarre obsession with "unsealing" classified documents to better understand the mistakes and triumphs of the past. Thomas Jefferson? Moron. James Madison? Hippie. And don’t...

Governor Asks Shooters Pretty Please Self-Regulate While Utah Burns Because Of Shooters

OK cowboys and cowgirls, gather 'round the semi-automatic campfire for a heartwarming story of the destruction of land, homes and wildlife in the great American state of Utah. Here's the story in a nutshell: Utah's "Dump Fire" (so named...

Darrell Issa Will Put Eric Holder In Gitmo Forever And Then Steal His Cars

Oil-soaked arsonist car thief Rep. Darrell Issa, the unlikely subpoena-wielding chair of the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee, appears at long last to be fulfilling his duty of stickin' it to the Obama administration over one grossly exaggerated...