Well it’s fall. Summer was fun, but, hey, it’s gone, and now it’s fall. Fall brings pretty leaves, perhaps a political affair (nesting occurs more during these months), maybe a public option, and who knows what else! And for you, there is so much fun to be had in fall. MORE »

Georgia gubernatorial candidate Neal Horsley, a.k.a. “The One,” wants to secede from America because of the liberals. This charming fellow made headlines a few years ago when he got into an argument with Alan Colmes, who simply couldn’t understand why Horsley would fuck the shit out of mules. (”Welcome to domestic life on the farm… If it’s warm and it’s damp and it vibrates, you might in fact have sex with it.”) And now, in an interview with Raw Story Dylan Otto Krider, Horsley says he would kill his son in a secessionist rebellion, because hey, WAR IS HELL (and also he almost killed him once before in a dumb argument, ha). MORE »

Everyone’s favorite Barry Obama tried to connect with “the average American” serf today by attending the whitest event ever: the “Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo 2008.” Hurrah! He sat on various farm tractors, and then looked at other farm tractors, and then asked people what the hell tractors do. Let’s take a tour of the various Getty wire photos covering this event and see what Barry learned about the country folk! MORE »

Wonkette operative Christine Longiaru (via Jessica Keltz) found this charming rural decoration while “traveling for work” in upstate New York. The most awesome thing about this anti-Hillary agricultural-simulacra tableau is that the guy finished it, stepped back, gave it a proud once-over, and went back into the house completely satisfied with his work.