Tag Archives: extortion

  Revenge Porn is so hard to do correctly

Sociopath Revenge Porn Operator Can’t Believe Google Would Infringe On His Privacy :(

You know what’s hard? Running a revenge-porn operation on the interwebs. Posting the pictures is easy, but did you know that the other half of the gig is the extortion part? Man, extortion is so hard to do without getting called out by all of those downers out there who get mad when you post nude pictures of them online. And to top it all off, people sometimes don’t respect your personal privacy if you’re a revenge-porn site operator, can you believe THAT? Read more on Sociopath Revenge Porn Operator Can’t Believe Google Would Infringe On His Privacy :(…
  hey dad I'm in jail

Arkansas Treasurer Goes To Jail For Extortion, But The Boring Kind

We for one would like to know a little bit more about Arkansas Dem lady treasurer Martha Shoffner, and why she is IN JAIL! Like, the story is all “Oh the FBI says she is extortin’ the people,” but maybe it is a theft of honest services kind of extortin’? Which last we heard the Supreme Court said didn’t exist? Because if this is all their evidence, it does not seem like extortion so much as “total kickbacks.” Which, don’t get us wrong, fuck you Martha Shoffner! If you are guilty! Read more on Arkansas Treasurer Goes To Jail For Extortion, But The Boring Kind…
  what is 'is john roberts gay' alex?

Rightwing Blogger’s Shocking Discovery: John Roberts Was Blackmailed, Arrests To Come Soon!

How is it possible that it took the #WARBLOGS over an hour to discover the real reason John Roberts made a dookie on the NRO’s face, by agreeing that the Heritage Foundation’s proposal for health care reform, and one that had been flogged by the GOP as far back as Gingrich’s tenure as Emperor of the House, was in fact Constitutional? We cannot answer that for you, we can only do our best to amplify one blogger’s shocking discovery the best our humble website can, by bringing you this obvious explanation from “Harry” at “ToBeRight.” Later this afternoon, it’s going to come out that Roberts was coerced. A Secret Service agent overheard Obama and Axelrod discussing the Roberts blackmail. He managed to get them on tape discussing it. Later this afternoon, the whole story will come out, Roberts will issue his REAL opinion, and Obama and Axelrod will be taken away in handcuffs. What could they possibly have on John Roberts? This suggestion, from the endlessly concerning search terms that bring readers to Your Wonket, might hold an answer! Read more on Rightwing Blogger’s Shocking Discovery: John Roberts Was Blackmailed, Arrests To Come Soon!…
  america's wang we love you

How Gay Is Charlie Crist’s Extortion Scandal, On A Scale From One To Very Gay?

Sometimes when you’re watching reruns of not-so-old TV shows, you wonder about what ever happened to the bit players. I mean, sure, Joey from Friends will never have to work a day in his life again (which is good, because he probably won’t), but what if you’re one of the ladies who played his interchangeable girlfriends? Do you burn out of Hollywood and end up back at a boring office job, and you have to make occasional sales calls where people say “Didn’t you have sex with Joey from Friends in 1998?” and then it’s super-awkward. Similarly, we know that the big stars of the 2008 presidential campaign will be senators and/or grifters for as long as they want to be, but what about the supporting cast, like beloved orange moderate ex-Florida Governor Charlie Crist, who could have been Vice President, but then wasn’t? What’s he doing with his time, other than staring off into space and thinking about how he wasted his life? We already know that he’s working as some kind of TV lawyer shill, but did you know he’s also involved in some sordid case where the ex-head of the Florida GOP is trying extort money from him, possibly for gayness-related reasons? Read more on How Gay Is Charlie Crist’s Extortion Scandal, On A Scale From One To Very Gay?…
  dept. of tearful confessions

Republican Paid $150,000 To Keep Totally Innocent Hot-Tubbing Incident Quiet

Science proves that there is nothing wrong with people hot-tubbing in the nude near each other, even when one person is 28 and the other person is 15. In spite of this fact, some gal needed $150,000 to “heal” from the painful memory of being naked in a hot tub near Kevin Garn once, a long time ago. Read more on Republican Paid $150,000 To Keep Totally Innocent Hot-Tubbing Incident Quiet…
 

Conservative Lawmaker: “I have not had sex with a guy”

Washington (state) is abuzz this week with rumors that state Rep. Richard Curtis is involved in an extortion ring with a “reputed” male prostitute — in other words, Did he fuck a dude? Curtis is obviously a Republican with a socially conservative voting record, so allegations like these were sure to come out sometime. As was his predictable response: “I am not gay… I have not had sex with a guy.” Sure, but… DOES HE LIE? Read more on Conservative Lawmaker: “I have not had sex with a guy”…
 

‘Bush Has Been Vampiring Everybody In America’

Are you caught in a “battering downward spiral of hate” and constantly harassed by Dick Cheney’s extortion robots and endless anal assaults? Are the termites for you or against you? If all of this makes sense, you belong in Nadine’s World — sort of like Elmo’s World, if that beloved children’s muppet had been created by Philip K. Dick. Nadine sends us e-mail, lots of e-mail. In these epistles — which also go to ABC News, the DoJ, Micheal Moore and the Huffington Post — she reveals a chilling underworld of robot sex dolls, a “Cheney Church,” political capital and smoke alarms that watch your every move. Join us after the jump for Chapter 7 of Nadine’s accidental novel. Read more on ‘Bush Has Been Vampiring Everybody In America’…