Tag: exits

Newt Gingrich Drops Out To Spend More Time With His Creditors

Newt Gingrich was just on the teevee talking about the moon, jobs, Kaiser Wilhelm, Mitt Romney, Barack Obama, cocaine and methamphetamine, amnesia, his grandchildren, Ellis the Elephant, dropping out of the Republican presidential nominating contest, and everything else he...

SO LONG, RELIABLE MONDAY POST TOPIC!: Sunday night news dud! Discreetly tucked away in italics at the bottom of this latest crap about Ronald Reagan and whatever: "This is William Kristol’s last column." Jesus, New York Times, don't get...

Bush Staffers Exit Sadly

Barack Obama's transition team has been preparing for months to take over the government, but George Bush's people aren't quite ready to let go. They haz a sad, because they worked in this place for this guy for like...

Hillary Clinton’s Late For Her Own Graduation!

Welcome to Wonkette's Hillary Clinton Graduation Pool Party! We have many "hot dogs" for you to eat, and Miller High Life for the adults. But oh, where is the graduate herself, Hillary Clinton? According to the teevee, she is...

YOU'RE ALL INVITED TO WONKETTE'S HILLARY CLINTON POOL PARTY: Tomorrow, Washington, D.C. will reach a heat index of 105 degrees, Fahrenheit. You will not be able to play outside, so you might as well watch Hillary's big farewell speech...

Too Much Last-Minute Fake News! Time For A Bulleted List

We will be back tonight to provide more blog laffs as we cover the Montana and South Dakota primaries, the final two in this Historic Election between an Historic Black Person and an Historic Woman. Until then, check out...

A Children’s Treasury Of Hilarious Comments About The AP On Hillary’s Blog

This morning, the Associated Press wrote that Hillary would concede the delegate race to Barack Obama tonight, which is very nearly the same thing as "conceding the race." The Clinton campaign then called this story 100% false and said...

It’s Over?! (UPDATE: No!)

"WASHINGTON - Hillary Rodham Clinton will concede Tuesday night that Barack Obama has the delegates to secure the Democratic nomination, campaign officials said, effectively ending her bid to be the nation's first female president." But! "The former first lady will...

Is Our Hillary Going To Drop Out Or Not? Someone Find Out!

Can Obama do it? Can Hillary force herself to lose? Every reporter in the country is scanning e-mails, harassing sources, divining from "expense reports," following travel schedules, monitoring clandestine superdelegate meetings, et cetera et cetera and so forth, to...

Marc Dann Finally Resigns

Mitt Quits, A Nation Sobs

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

THE CORPORATES WIN, FREE DEATH FOR ALL