exits

Newt Gingrich was just on the teevee talking about the moon, jobs, Kaiser Wilhelm, Mitt Romney, Barack Obama, cocaine and methamphetamine, amnesia, his grandchildren, Ellis the Elephant, dropping out of the Republican presidential nominating contest, and everything else he has ever thought about for half-a-second since 1968. He has had a marvelous run. What now? […]

OH WELL THAT ONLY TOOK A YEAR  2:00 am January 26, 2009

by Jim Newell

SO LONG, RELIABLE MONDAY POST TOPIC!: Sunday night news dud! Discreetly tucked away in italics at the bottom of this latest crap about Ronald Reagan and whatever: “This is William Kristol’s last column.” Jesus, New York Times, don’t get so excitable like that! FURTHER ANALYSIS IN THE MORROW… [NYT]

Barack Obama’s transition team has been preparing for months to take over the government, but George Bush’s people aren’t quite ready to let go. They haz a sad, because they worked in this place for this guy for like eight years, and now they have to go back to their regular babysitting gigs or grad […]

Welcome to Wonkette’s Hillary Clinton Graduation Pool Party! We have many “hot dogs” for you to eat, and Miller High Life for the adults. But oh, where is the graduate herself, Hillary Clinton? According to the teevee, she is “at least 10 minutes late.” And she’s supposed to deliver the commencement address, just like she […]

HILLARY CLINTON  6:49 pm June 6, 2008

by Jim Newell

YOU’RE ALL INVITED TO WONKETTE’S HILLARY CLINTON POOL PARTY: Tomorrow, Washington, D.C. will reach a heat index of 105 degrees, Fahrenheit. You will not be able to play outside, so you might as well watch Hillary’s big farewell speech in which she will endorse Senator Barack Obama, depending on your interpretation of “endorse” (shoot?). The […]

We will be back tonight to provide more blog laffs as we cover the Montana and South Dakota primaries, the final two in this Historic Election between an Historic Black Person and an Historic Woman. Until then, check out the latest gossip and “news” surrounding this End of this Historic Primary Election in History, after […]

This morning, the Associated Press wrote that Hillary would concede the delegate race to Barack Obama tonight, which is very nearly the same thing as “conceding the race.” The Clinton campaign then called this story 100% false and said Hillary won’t be concedin’ nothin’ tonight. And since Hillary’s rabid loyalists are already peeved with the […]

“WASHINGTON – Hillary Rodham Clinton will concede Tuesday night that Barack Obama has the delegates to secure the Democratic nomination, campaign officials said, effectively ending her bid to be the nation’s first female president.” But!

Can Obama do it? Can Hillary force herself to lose? Every reporter in the country is scanning e-mails, harassing sources, divining from “expense reports,” following travel schedules, monitoring clandestine superdelegate meetings, et cetera et cetera and so forth, to see what’s gonna happen tomorrow. Here’s a bulleted list of tea leaves being read. Our guess? […]

OHIO  6:00 pm May 15, 2008

Marc Dann Finally Resigns

by Jim Newell

FOX NEWS  1:30 pm February 7, 2008

Mitt Quits, A Nation Sobs

by Jim Newell

REPUBLICANS  12:13 pm February 7, 2008

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

by Jim Newell