Tag Archives: evolution

  When Dunning Met Kruger

Homeschool Mom Disproves Evolution Because Science Museum Is Stupid

We know what we're talking about, right?
Meet Megan Fox, who is not the dopey actress from the Transformers movies, but is instead a dopey homeschooling mom who doesn’t believe that  organisms transform over time. She has her very own YouTube channel where she reviews children’s books and pursues a single-minded crusade against corruption on the public library board of Orland Park, Illinois. Read more on Homeschool Mom Disproves Evolution Because Science Museum Is Stupid…
  We Watch So You Don't Have To

The Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report: Evolution Is For Communists And Other Classics

With so much controversy around science these days, who’s to say what’s right and what’s wrong? Whittaker Chambers is who’s to say what’s right and what’s wrong, that’s who. Yes, it’s November 2014, and Sarah Palin is taking time to explain that Whittaker Chambers was a really cool guy who also understood so little about science that he eventually realized he understand everything about science. Read more on The Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report: Evolution Is For Communists And Other Classics…
  The Origin Of Specious

Sundays With The Christianists: Charles Darwin Was A Very Bad Man, A Very Bad Man Indeed

We have no context for this image. But Charles Darwin WILL learn you on this.
If it’s Sunday, it must be time for another foray into the mind of Colorado radio man o’ God and homeschooling big wheel Kevin Swanson, the genius who warns that the Girl Scouts are communist lesbians whose cookies fund abortions and lesbianism, although we aren’t sure why lesbians are having all those abortions anyway. We’ve been delving into Swanson’s 2013 freshman term paper book Apostate: The Men Who Destroyed the Christian West, a sloppy little history of the ideas and thinkers who have been ruining Western Culture by making it what we think of as “Western Culture.” Last week, we learned that Karl Marx was a monster who starved his children (no he wasn’t) and who was driven by actual contact with demons. This week, it’s Charles Darwin’s turn to get Swansoned, although we suppose it’s possible that even after Apostate has completely dismantled him, Darwin may still be considered important, because people are just that stubborn and prone to evil. Read more on Sundays With The Christianists: Charles Darwin Was A Very Bad Man, A Very Bad Man Indeed…
  You Got Your Science In My Religion: A Study In Contrasts

Pope Trolls Creationists, Says Evolution Is A Thing

Sure, they both believe in Invisible Sky Daddy. But one guy at least seems to live on this planet.
Pope Francis gave a lot of fundagelicals a sad Monday when he restated a fairly simple tenet of Catholic belief: There’s no contradiction between faith and science, particularly the theory of evolution and the Big Bang. Read more on Pope Trolls Creationists, Says Evolution Is A Thing…
  E. Coli Now Smarter Than Creationists!

Michigan State University Gets To Learn Why Darwin Did The Holocaust

Actually, we might go to this conference...
Thanks to some help from a campus student group, Michigan State University’s campus in East Lansing gets to host a great big Creationism conference, not that the university itself is particularly excited about the prospect of bringing in a bunch of goofballs to argue that Darwin = Hitler. Read more on Michigan State University Gets To Learn Why Darwin Did The Holocaust…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments Of The Week: An Armed Society Will Teach Black Teens Some Manners

Scootaloo is neither a gun owner nor Jewish, as far as we know. She worships Rainbow Dash
It’s time for our weekly mucking-out of the ol’ comments queue — a chore that we manage to be more diligent about than we are when it comes to changing the water in our betta fish’s tank. Sorry about that, Flushy, but the slime is just a lot thicker in the comments queue. This week, we have some fresh steaming nonsense from a couple of Internet warriors who are quite unhappy at the life sentence handed to Florida sociopath Michael Dunn in the first-degree murder of Jordan Davis. According to one “Jim Smithill,” Jordan Davis got exactly what he deserved for being a black teenager in a vehicle that was rudely playing loud music — as we all know, it’s the thuggish rear-seat passengers who cause the most trouble: Read more on Deleted Comments Of The Week: An Armed Society Will Teach Black Teens Some Manners…
  clipbait

This Neato Video On Evolution Won’t Convince Creationists Of Anything

Those Neanderthal ponies are scary. The world of 1983 was primitive and brutal.
Here’s a pretty nifty science video from Interwebs science project Stated Clearly, a project aimed at making science stuff more easily accessible. We ran across it over at RawStory, where Arturo Garcia, ever the optimist, says that this brief look at the evidence for evolution “should come in handy for anyone debating the issue with creationists.” Haha, that is a nice dream you have, and we were young and hopeful once, too! Garcia is right about one thing — you may indeed be glad to be armed with facts, which is always a good thing; just don’t have any illusion that mere scientific reality will convince a creationist of anything. Read more on This Neato Video On Evolution Won’t Convince Creationists Of Anything…
  Here have some news n stuff

Susan G. Komen Doesn’t Have A Problem With Cancer, As Long As It’s Pink

FAIL
Susan G. Komen for the Cure disgraced itself in 2012 under the policy leadership of “pro-life” Republican wingnut (and Sarah Palin favorite!) Karen Handel, when it decided to go to war with Planned Parenthood and be on the wrong side of the war on women. It was a disaster for the supposed breast cancer cure advocate, and the organization has never recovered. And this certainly won’t help: Read more on Susan G. Komen Doesn’t Have A Problem With Cancer, As Long As It’s Pink…
  His Transformation Into Lonesome Rhodes Is Nearly Complete

Glenn Beck Will Save World From Ebola With Song Reminding You Not To Lick Up Vomit

Who sent this? We lost your name! Let us credit/blame you!
Glenn Beck has the solution to the Ebola panic: Make fun of stupid Africans who don’t have the sense not to play around with infected bodily fluids! Which is why he made him a song about it, complete with music video: Read more on Glenn Beck Will Save World From Ebola With Song Reminding You Not To Lick Up Vomit…
  Uterine Clown Car Survivor Speaks Out

Duggars Did A Pretty Good Job Edumacatin’ Their Womb-Fruits, All Right

Just as Darwin Demanded
Reality Teevee show person Jessa Duggar went to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington DC, and came away believing that Charles Darwin led directly to the Nazis’ attempted extermination of European Jewry, which suggests that the museum’s docents really need to up their game. Ms. Duggar, 21, explained on Instagram the profound anti-science message that she derived from the historical exhibits: Read more on Duggars Did A Pretty Good Job Edumacatin’ Their Womb-Fruits, All Right…
  Your morning cup of wut?

Ted Cruz Will Defend Your TV-Watching Rights And Other News You Can Maybe Use

He went to law school so he knows law stuff
Today’s news is filled with Dudes Who Will Never Be President. Also science. And a special Yr Editrix treat for morning dessert! Did you know your God-given uninalienableable rights to watch teevee are under attack? Be grateful Sen. Ted Cruz, who will never be president, is here to make sure Actual President Obama can never pry your teevee from your cold dead hands: Read more on Ted Cruz Will Defend Your TV-Watching Rights And Other News You Can Maybe Use…
  Also God Makes Icebergs Shaped Like Dicks

Photoshopped Cow With Map Of The World Proves Creationism Is Real

Do you ever wish Dok weren’t on vacation? US TOO! Because here is a “Special Offer for WND Readers,” and it is a picture of a cow with a map on it that proves … God gave people Photoshop? Unclear. But oh, haha, “CreationMoments” is not stupid. They know there might possibly maybe be some Photoshop trickery, in this random cow picture they found on the internet. BUT WHO MADE THE COW? Huh Mr. Smartypants Atheist Hellbound Snootmeister What Is Probly a Jew? WHO DID THAT? Read more on Photoshopped Cow With Map Of The World Proves Creationism Is Real…
  all the derp that's fit to herp

Derp Roundup: Tiger Selfies, Responsible Howitzer Owners, And Open Carry Guitars

Welcome to another Derp Roundup, the feature where we turn a pressure-washer on our browser tabs and skim off the weird, just for you. Please read responsibly and do not operate heavy machinery while under the influence of Derp. Our Lead Derp is one of those things that we didn’t know was a thing until it was banned: the New York legislature voted last week to prohibit people from getting close enough to big cats to take pictures with them, which has the effect of banning “tiger selfies.” Which is a thing that exists, or existed: Dudebros attempting to attract a mate (and perhaps boost their mana stats) by taking a picture with big captive jungle kitties. Stephen Colbert mentioned it last week, and at first we thought it had to be a hoax, but no, this is real. There’s a collection of Tinder dating photos of Bromeos showing their manliness by cuddling with creatures that might decide to make them a snack. So far, the dudebros have only been potential candidates for the Darwin Award, and New York’s interference has now prevented this experiment from proceeding. Ah well — they can still be the control group. Read more on Derp Roundup: Tiger Selfies, Responsible Howitzer Owners, And Open Carry Guitars…
  the facepalmetto state

Let’s Meet Lee Atwater’s Widow, Sally, Who Is Running For Something Somewhere, Badly

Sally Atwater, widow of the late Master of Electoral RatLovemaking Lee Atwater, is heading into a runoff primary for the Republican nomination for South Carolina’s State Superintendent of Education. Last week, she called in to this radio show hosted by Russ Cassell, who asked her some questions about teaching sex ed and creationism. While he’s a badgering dopey rightwing doofus, she actually manages to seem even worse, simply not answering fairly straightforward questions about whether and how sex ed should be taught, and punting altogether on evolution as well, neither saying she’s for it or agin’ it. It’s really a fairly impressive of volunteering nothing, which is remarkable in that she called the program to share her views. Which she apparently doesn’t have any of. But she did manage something pretty amazing — she made us share in a rightwing radio host’s annoyance at her non-answers, and we can pretty much agree with Cassell’s conclusion that Atwater is “an example of a person running for public office on name recognition only who is clueless.” Read more on Let’s Meet Lee Atwater’s Widow, Sally, Who Is Running For Something Somewhere, Badly…
  if evolution is science then why are there still creationists?

Creationist Guy Discovers Ugly Truth About Evolution: It’s Just An Excuse For Rape

So here’s a new take on why evolution — or as the producers of this video from Creation Today put it, “evolution,” with scare quotes ’cause there’s no such thing — cannot possibly be true. Nice man Darek Isaacs has been reading up on “evolution,” and he realized that “evolution” inevitably leads to a “very, very dark place.” You see, if “evolution” were true, then rape would obviously be OK, because with no God to send us to Hell, we’d all just sin alla time, and also, there’d be no constraining the wild seed-sowing of ravenous males! Read more on Creationist Guy Discovers Ugly Truth About Evolution: It’s Just An Excuse For Rape…
  schism all over their face

Big Creationist Fight Breaks Out At Christian College; Somebody’s Doing Heresy!

You guys all remember the Scopes Monkey Trial, in which Spencer Tracy and Frederic March duked it out over whether a schoolteacher in Dayton, Tennessee (a surprisingly young Dick York), should be fined for violating Tennessee’s law against teaching evolution, and then Gene Kelly got famous writing about it for the Baltimore papers? One thing a lot of people forget about the Scopes Trial is that John Scopes actually lost — he was found guilty. We can recommend a good book on it: Edward Larson’s Summer For The Gods. In the long haul, evolution “won,” having the advantage of being scientific reality. And the victorious lawyer for the prosecution, William Jennings Bryan, died just five days after winning; he was memorialized in Dayton with the 1930 founding of Bryan College, a fundamentalist Christian school that does not teach evolution. And that’s where the distant evolutionary descendants of velociraptors have come home to roost: The college is now having a big ol’ creationism fight of its own. Let’s pop up some popcorn (the result of both natural and artificial selection) and enjoy the show. Read more on Big Creationist Fight Breaks Out At Christian College; Somebody’s Doing Heresy!…
  could it be ... satan?

Bigot Twins: Satan Overturned The Guilty Verdict In The Scopes Monkey Trial (And Canceled Our Show)

We really can’t get enough of those bigot twins, Jason and David Benham, whom HGTV unceremoniously kicked to the curb when they found out they were up-to-their-eyeballs-level full of bigot. After that, their bank tried to break up with them, but howler monkeys on the internet made the bank reverse its decision. We’re hoping the bank comes to regret that decision, given that the Benhams seem utterly incapable of shutting their pieholes and have left a rich trail of stupid all over the internet. Today’s find: evolution equals Satan, or brought Satan with it, or something. Read more on Bigot Twins: Satan Overturned The Guilty Verdict In The Scopes Monkey Trial (And Canceled Our Show)…
  faith-off of the century

Pat Robertson And Ken Ham In Sexy Young-Earth-Creationism Catfight

We always enjoy a good wingnut-on-wingnut squirmish, and here’s a dandy: “Young-Earth” creationist Ken Ham, the squirrel (or perhaps Cronopio dentiacutus) who “debated” Bill Nye at the Creation Museum a while back, is very, very cross with fellow rightwing Christianist Pat Robertson because Robertson recently said that the Earth is not, in fact, six thousand years old. Ham said that Robertson’s rejection of the literal truth of the first chapters of Genesis was Bad For The Christians: “Sadly, it’s Pat Robertson who makes Christianity look silly, which is why the atheists love him today,” Ham said. “What a travesty! This man uses his position on a major Christian TV program to help the atheists mock God’s Word!” Now, now, Ken: we love you both, and we don’t play favorites. Better? Read more on Pat Robertson And Ken Ham In Sexy Young-Earth-Creationism Catfight…
  mammoth cave

Science Nice Time! S.C. Drops Creationist Nonsense From Awesome Girl’s Fossil Bill

Hurrah and high-fives all around for 8-year-old science fan Olivia McConnell, the nifty South Carolina kid who wrote to her state legislators to propose that they name the Columbian Wooly Mammoth as the state fossil. Her state senator and representative thought it was a good idea, too, so they introduced a bill, and everyone felt good about helping South Carolina children to learn how a bill becomes a law. Except that after the bill passed the state House, it got hung up in the Senate because a couple of creationist morons wanted to insert language explaining how God made mammoths on the sixth day, about 6000 years ago (on a Saturday), and then we all felt terrible because Olivia was learning entirely too much about how government actually works. But now, here is the update we genuinely didn’t expect would come anywhere near this soon: Rachel Maddow reported Tuesday night that the Senate has agreed to remove the creationist language from the bill and let a clean version go forward. Yay, science, and yay, Olivia! Read more on Science Nice Time! S.C. Drops Creationist Nonsense From Awesome Girl’s Fossil Bill…
  mike fair is most foul

State Sen. Mike Fair, Leading Sh**muffin Candidate, Has More Fun Creationist Plans For SC Schools

Exciting news in the 2014 race for Legislative Shitmuffin of the Year! An anti-evolution set of science education standards sponsored by one of our leading candidates, South Carolina state Sen. Mike Fair, has passed in committee, and will now go to the state Board of Education for consideration. The standards would require science teachers in the state to “teach the controversy” about the theory of evolution through natural selection. And while the best answer would simply be to say “among scientists, there is no controversy about the reality of evolution,” the bill would actually require inclusion of non-science in science classes, for the sake of providing equal time for myth and religion. You know, for the sake of the kids. Read more on State Sen. Mike Fair, Leading Sh**muffin Candidate, Has More Fun Creationist Plans For SC Schools…
  Q: Are We Not Men? A: We are DEVO

Academic Freedom To Teach Bible As Science Upheld In Lucky Louisiana

Nice try, but no cigar, lovers of science in the Pelican State. For the fourth time since the Doublespeaky “Louisiana Science Education Act” (LSEA) was passed in 2008, an attempt to repeal the law has been shot down, by a 3-1 vote in the Senate Education Committee. This means that teachers in the Great State of Jindalia can continue to teach “critical thinking” by supplementing the state’s official science curriculum with additional materials of their choice, which (nudge-nudge) may “help students understand, analyze, critique, and review scientific theories in an objective manner.” In other words, they can “teach the controversy” and drag in materials that say evolution and climate change are just crazy ideas that shouldn’t be taken seriously. What a nice victory for academic freedom, which should always include the freedom to not teach facts. Read more on Academic Freedom To Teach Bible As Science Upheld In Lucky Louisiana…
  hot hot education standards action

Wannabe Congresscritter Will Go To Washington To Stop Evolution Being Shoved Down Children’s Throats

Up here in Minnesota, this tundra-dwelling portion of yr Wonkette has to deal with the double indignity of snow STILL being on the ground even as congressional endorsement balloting begins. It’s two terrible tastes that taste terrible together. This weekend, Minnesota saw the GOP hurl forward Aaron Miller, a fine upstanding young military vet, to challenge Democratic incumbent Tim Walz. Why does Miller care so much about getting to Washington? So his spawn won’t ever be forced to learn how science works, basically. He also called for more religious freedoms. He repeated his story about his daughter returning home from school because evolution was being taught in her class. He said the teacher admitted to not believing in the scientific theory to his daughter but told her that the government forced him to teach the lesson. “We should decide what is taught in our schools, not Washington D.C.,” Miller said. Read more on Wannabe Congresscritter Will Go To Washington To Stop Evolution Being Shoved Down Children’s Throats…