Let’s see, sham election resulting in much Western/Israeli War Lust, voters beaten and shot at and murdered in the streets, global crisis, etc. So what’s famously amoral “win the afternoon” sleaze dealer The Politico got to say about it all? Ah, right …. [Link Ban Back On]

Late Night Shots, the exclusive invitation-only social networking club for young Confederate boys and the girls they photograph urinating, in Georgetown, will now expand. In Georgetown. LNS founder Reed Landry is pairing up with some law school student named “Fritz Brogan” (who is rich and friends with Jeb Bush) to launch a new alcohol establishment at 3277 M Street. It will literally be called “The Country Club,” according to this pink blog. “Country Club will not have a sign on the door. While Landry handled the interior design, Brogan insists it will have his signature ’sweaty dance floor.’” [Ask Miss A]

THE BEST CONSERVATIVE MOVIES OF THE LAST 25 YEARS: “#12. The Dark Knight (2008): This film gives us a portrait of the hero as a man reviled. In his fight against the terrorist Joker, Batman has to devise new means of surveillance, push the limits of the law, and accept the hatred of the press and public. If that sounds reminiscent of a certain former president—whose stubborn integrity kept the nation safe and turned the tide of war—don’t mention it to the mainstream media.” MORE »

Dick Cheney, merchant of Doom, moved into the Naval Observatory eight years ago and made it disappear, magically, from Google Earth. A vague hologram of the mansion lingered aboveground while the actual dwelling burrowed 666 fathoms below the earth’s crust, coming at last to rest in a den of snakes. All you could see in aerial photos on Google Earth was a bunch of squares and nothingness in the midst of a normal neighborhood of houses and trees. MORE »

Ah, here it is, gamesetmatch for McCain — Obama’s been caught kidnapping/fathering black children in French Hawaii! We knew something was up with this slimeball. If you want to see more spy photos from this man’s private vacation, the Huffington Post has a nice collection. What a family! When we look at this picture, all negativity and trauma briefly drowns out from the world; every problem has been momentarily solved and there are no more questions to ask. When a HuffPo commenter looks at this picture, however, (s)he types, “Awww … how sweet. BO takes yet ANOTHER vacation while another country goes under. Good thing HRC is on the trail saving his inexperienced a**!!!” You’d have to be a damn fool to believe these nice vacation photos wouldn’t become attack fodder. [HuffPo]

Hey now, what ever happened to Clinton’s former chief strategist Mark “Bowser” Penn, the most stereotypically evil man in the world? When he was demoted from his top position, no one expected him to have any less sway, yet he’s remained shielded from the public eye. Now, however, some new information has come to light about Penn’s role in these last days: rumors indicate that Penn, more than anyone else in the campaign, wants to take the fight to the convention — for all the predictably devilish reasons, as well as the numerous free buffets. MORE »

A long time ago in the 1990s there was this teevee program called The X-Files — a creepy mix of Nixon-era political conspiracy, the occult, fake terror attacks, FEMA killing everybody, and Space Demons. It seemed completely fantastic until 2001, when Dick Cheney and George W. Bush began their reign of horror. And finally, after years of silence, the creators of the X-Files are talking about how this administration stole all their ideas, even 9/11! MORE »

How many times can Hillary say John McCain is better than Barack Obama in 24 hours? While the headline indicates this number would be 80 million, it is actually more like 750 million. After the jump, watch a nice highlight reel of Hillary’s current strategy against Barack: Hillary will kill terror, McCain will kill terror, Obama gave a speech in 2002. MORE »

In an attempt to quell angry God people from getting all self-righteous (good luck!), Mitt Romney held an invitation-only event with students, faculty and alumni of Bob Jones University Tuesday. Guess he figured that since it was a closed event, whatever private revelations about his campaign that would be discussed would never in a million years reach the press. And who wouldn’t believe that!? Sure enough, some sleuth at the meeting sneaked in an “audio recording device” — they can tape soundz people make! — and leaked it to CNN. Basic point: School Chancellor Bob Jones III endorsed Mitt Romney but by and large hates him. MORE »

Who is America’s Most Evil Candidate? A new study proves it is Mitt Romney, followed closely by Rudy Giuliani. As usual, loser Ron Paul just barely registers in the poll. [Most Evil 2008 United States Presidential Candidates]

Beloved “Christian Clown” and minister arrested in Illinois “for allegedly taking naked photographs of young boys at a Philippines orphanage.” But don’t worry, the clown was only there on a “clowning trip.” (PS: There are at least two Klutzo the Clowns in Illinois, and this one isn’t the Accused Molester.) [Agitprop]