Tag: erick erickson

Here Are Erick Erickson’s Nuanced Thoughts About The Planned Parenthood Shooting

It's weird to watch a complete psychopath like Erick Erickson try to feign compassion. You can almost see his triple chin quiver with the sheer effort of it. You can see his piggish little eyes screw shut as he tries...
It's only racist if it's about the guy on the top, according to wingnuts.

RedState Explains Racisting, How Does It Work?

The bucket of mental squirrel pellets known as wingnut intertubes site RedState has found somebody making racisms! No, it wasn't about President Obama. We're pretty sure they're still complaining about how the P.C. police won't let them hurl racial slurs in...
evan hurst. just kidding, it's young handsome joe biden!

Wingnuts Piss All Over Grieving Joe Biden, Because That’s What They Do

Finally, after weeks and weeks and WEEKS AND FUCKING WEEKS of know-nothing speculation, we have our answer. Old Handsome Joe Biden is not running for president, and would like to spend some more time grieving his recently deceased son, can...
Classic pulp covers just don't account for women as equal participants in legislative diddling

It Turns Out We Weren’t Kidding About Kevin McCarthy’s Sex Scandal. Huh!

Remember a long, long time ago, when we told you John Boehner was quittin' this here speaker job, probably because SEX SCANDAL? And you were like, Oh, Wonkette, LOLZ, you're so funny, with the jokes, that's why we love...
How can we be lovers if we can't be friends?

Erick Erickson Quitting RedState To Spend More Time F*cking Goats

After twat-teasing us over the summer with promises to go the fuck away, and then not doing that, the redundantly named foul-brained metric fuckton of shit squeezed into a half-fuckton sack that is conservative blogger Erick Erickson has finally...
Values Voters arriving.

It’s The Values Voter Summit! Has Grindr Crashed Yet?

Hooray, the Values Voter Summit started Friday morning in Washington ... and you're late! Haha, just kidding, it's never too late to go to a sausage party full of sad, closeted dicks. We woulda been ALL OVER THIS SHIT...

Let’s Meet Our New House Speaker In Charge Of Getting Nothing Done In Congress!

So. We have now had a chance to BRB, DYING OF LAUGHTER about the breaking news that Weeper of the House John Boehner is taking his gavel and going home at the end of October. So, who's going...
Still up on that cross.

Kim Davis Is In Jail, And Wingnuts Are Jizz-Crapping Their Pull-Ups In RAGE!

CRU-CI-FY! CRU-CI-FY! CRU-CI-FY! Oh, we are just joshing, nobody wants Kim Davis crucified. (OR DO WE?) Wingnuts, though? Remember that time they lost their whole country in the span of a week, because gay marriage was legalized and the Confederate flag...

You Really Hurt Giant Pussy Erick Erickson’s Feelings, You Jerks

Who knew RedState editor and Fox News contributor Erick Erickson, son of himself, was such a giant pussy? Oh, sorry, we mean such a "insert euphemism of choice related to the female reproductive system"? Turns out, though, he is,...

Great Feminist Blog RedState Says Hillary Clinton Is An Ugly Ho

Once upon a time, there was a guy with with a real dumb redundant name that is dumb, and for an entire millisecond, he fancied himself a great defender of womenfolk and decency. And fellow feminist icon Jeb! Bush...
Chopped liver, apparently.

Megyn Kelly Joked About Her Husband’s Dick One Time, So Donald Trump Wins Forever

You know how Fox News "journalist" Megyn Kelly was probably bleeding from her V-word, and that's why she was such a B-word to Donald Trump during the Republican debate? (Or maybe not, and Donald Trump is a rude sexist...
But anybody can make one of these

Bristol Palin Takes Break From ISIS Battle To Slob Trump’s Knob

Attention, everyone, for Our Lady Of However Many Immaculate Conceptions, Bristol Palin, has taken to the blogotubes to discuss how the media is doing all the liberal censorship crimes to our prince and Palin family hero Donald Trump, just because...

If You Think Donald Trump Said Megyn Kelly Was Bleeding From Her Hoo-Ha, You’re A Nazi

OK, folks, we can all go home now, because we have reached the penultimate* plu-perfect** fucktasm of stupid on Aunt Flo-gate. You know, the Very Serious Matter of whether Fox News word-speaker Megyn Kelly was a girl dick to Donald...
Who ya got?

Donald Trump Pretty Sure Bleeder Megyn Kelly Is The One Who Should Say Sorry

Megyn Kelly is mean and bad and should be the one saying "sorry," y'all. Let's recap everything that's happened between Donald Trump, blowhard verbal diarrhea presidential candidate, and Kelly, Fox News anchor who sucks a lot but actually did...
There's no war on women. Maybe some casualties, but no war.

Republicans Bleeding From Their Everywheres, And It Is Awesome

The Republican Party is in the middle of a terribly bloody fight right now about which one of these assholes is the biggest asshole to women. (Hint: It's all of them.) Thanks to the party's current favorite presidential contender,...
Hey, it makes as much sense as the original

Donald Trump: Why Was Megyn Kelly Moderating A Debate Instead Of In The Blood Hut?

How's this for a surprise? Donald Trump shot his fool mouth off again, and this time managed to say something stupid enough to get himself disinvited from Erick Erickson's Cattle Call For Rightwing Ninnyhammers, as we all know what...