Tag: erick erickson

Let’s Meet Our New House Speaker In Charge Of Getting Nothing Done In Congress!

So. We have now had a chance to BRB, DYING OF LAUGHTER about the breaking news that Weeper of the House John Boehner is taking his gavel and going home at the end of October. So, who's going...
Still up on that cross.

Kim Davis Is In Jail, And Wingnuts Are Jizz-Crapping Their Pull-Ups In RAGE!

CRU-CI-FY! CRU-CI-FY! CRU-CI-FY! Oh, we are just joshing, nobody wants Kim Davis crucified. (OR DO WE?) Wingnuts, though? Remember that time they lost their whole country in the span of a week, because gay marriage was legalized and the Confederate flag...

You Really Hurt Giant Pussy Erick Erickson’s Feelings, You Jerks

Who knew RedState editor and Fox News contributor Erick Erickson, son of himself, was such a giant pussy? Oh, sorry, we mean such a "insert euphemism of choice related to the female reproductive system"? Turns out, though, he is,...

Great Feminist Blog RedState Says Hillary Clinton Is An Ugly Ho

Once upon a time, there was a guy with with a real dumb redundant name that is dumb, and for an entire millisecond, he fancied himself a great defender of womenfolk and decency. And fellow feminist icon Jeb! Bush...
Chopped liver, apparently.

Megyn Kelly Joked About Her Husband’s Dick One Time, So Donald Trump Wins Forever

You know how Fox News "journalist" Megyn Kelly was probably bleeding from her V-word, and that's why she was such a B-word to Donald Trump during the Republican debate? (Or maybe not, and Donald Trump is a rude sexist...
But anybody can make one of these

Bristol Palin Takes Break From ISIS Battle To Slob Trump’s Knob

Attention, everyone, for Our Lady Of However Many Immaculate Conceptions, Bristol Palin, has taken to the blogotubes to discuss how the media is doing all the liberal censorship crimes to our prince and Palin family hero Donald Trump, just because...

If You Think Donald Trump Said Megyn Kelly Was Bleeding From Her Hoo-Ha, You’re A Nazi

OK, folks, we can all go home now, because we have reached the penultimate* plu-perfect** fucktasm of stupid on Aunt Flo-gate. You know, the Very Serious Matter of whether Fox News word-speaker Megyn Kelly was a girl dick to Donald...
Who ya got?

Donald Trump Pretty Sure Bleeder Megyn Kelly Is The One Who Should Say Sorry

Megyn Kelly is mean and bad and should be the one saying "sorry," y'all. Let's recap everything that's happened between Donald Trump, blowhard verbal diarrhea presidential candidate, and Kelly, Fox News anchor who sucks a lot but actually did...
There's no war on women. Maybe some casualties, but no war.

Republicans Bleeding From Their Everywheres, And It Is Awesome

The Republican Party is in the middle of a terribly bloody fight right now about which one of these assholes is the biggest asshole to women. (Hint: It's all of them.) Thanks to the party's current favorite presidential contender,...
Hey, it makes as much sense as the original

Donald Trump: Why Was Megyn Kelly Moderating A Debate Instead Of In The Blood Hut?

How's this for a surprise? Donald Trump shot his fool mouth off again, and this time managed to say something stupid enough to get himself disinvited from Erick Erickson's Cattle Call For Rightwing Ninnyhammers, as we all know what...
Just lie back and think of gerrymandering

Erick Erickson: Fertile Latinos Will Breed Permanent GOP Majority, Strong Like Bull

Oh, sure, you liberals may be feeling pretty chuffed with how well 2015 has been going for you, what with your Obamacare surviving and your Supreme Court Victory for Sodom, and your beloved Barry Bamz just having a fine...
There might be some racist implications to this term. But only pussies care about racism

Wingnuts Invent Fun New Way To Slur Each Other, Hooray!

Heya Wonkers! We would like to have words with you. Or rather, a word with you. And that word is "cuckservative," which is the hot new catchphrase of Summer 2015. Expect to start seeing it everywhere soon, and also...
Little angel babies!

Watch Erick Erickson Shove This Coat Hanger Up GOP’s Vagina!

. Perpetual rage machine and Fox News contributor Erick Erickson is really, really mad that Planned Parenthood is getting rich off trafficking in murdered baby parts (which it isn't, but shut up, he knows it is). Not only is he demanding...
They call themselves His People. Weird.

Here Are 9 Wingnut Reasons For Charleston Murders That Aren’t Spelled R-A-C-I-S-M

Dylann Storm Roof killed black people because he wanted to kill black people. Roof admitted this! But maybe it's not about race. Let's take another trip down Wingnut River to see why Roof's nine victims -- Rev. Clementa Pinckney, Tywanza...
Vatican expert

Mike Huckabee: Hawking Fake Diabetes Cures Proves I’ll Be A Great President

Republican presidential "candidate" Mike Huckabee is in trouble with liberals like CBS's Bob Schieffer for, among other things, appearing in infomercials hawking "Diabetes Solution Kits" (yours for just $19.95!), which encourage healthy eating, exercise, oh and also curing diabetes with...

Baltimore’s All F*cked Up Because There Aren’t Enough Dads Or Jesus

Another day, another city torn apart and going up in flames because black folk get all pissy for some reason when cops kill them and then shrug when asked to explain how the hell that happened, all the time....