eric cantor

Gather round, ye children of this fair land. It has cometh to our attention that scoundrels, muckrakers, and charlatans hath sought and attained positions within our genteel federal government. These miscreants have the audacity to make partisan public speeches – IN PUBLIC, no less. These divisive, partisan activities and vile words are not acceptable to […]

Gentlemen, did you wake up this morning with a little extra pep in your Mr. Peepers? We sure did, because WE FINALLY GOT OUR PRESIDENT BACK! It’s like that awesome hopey and changey guy from 2008 snuck back out and sucker-punched the GOP right in the nards with like a million awesome words at the […]

Hey ladies. 2014 is around the corner, and that means that more GOP candidates will be mansplaining to you about how you shouldn’t be raped illegitimately and that military boys will be rapey boys so shut your mouth and make a goddam sammich. But this time around, the GOP wants to win over the Ovary-American […]

A bipartisan group of House representatives just reintroduced the International Violence Against Women Act (IVAWA). Yes, you read that correctly — there are Democrats AND Republicans who have bridged the cavernous divide on an issue as basic as trying to stop violencing womyns around the world. Join us after the jump to have your heart […]

Hey there, MoveOn.org! What’s new? Boy, that shutdown sure was a dilly of a humdinger, wasn’t it? But now that it is over, what positive actions do you plan to put your energy and not-inconsiderable financial resources into in order to help the country recover from the gargantuan nightmare of the last three weeks? Lobbying […]

You remember reading Calvin & Hobbes, the greatest comic ever written in the history of ever? Rambunctious little Calvin and his imaginary friend Hobbes would sometimes play Calvinball, a game where you make up the rules as you go along. Apparently, the GOP thought this was the greatest government blueprint since Green Eggs & Ham, […]

Shutdown day 11! Hope you have been getting your Government Shutdown Bonus Card stamped every day, because 12 shutdown days earns you one free voter repression in the swing state of your choice! (Wonkette is going with a minority college kid in North Carolina.) Well, yesterday saw President Obama meeting with top GOP lawmakers at […]

We have decided not to start off this post by reminding you how terrible you all are at caption contests. Negative reinforcements like that, for instance, would be a bad way to get your child to be able to read more gooder, or your husband to stop being a total dick. It’s just that we […]

For a minute, we were worried that everything was going to be fine: The House planned to vote on a clean Continuing Resolution that would avoid a shutdown and fund the government through December, splitting off the usual poison pill of de-funding Obamacare into a separate resolution for the Senate to laugh at.

So there has been a late August GOP whineathon about how liberals were co-opting noted Republican Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. by pretending he was some sort of liberal like them, when everyone knows Martin Luther King believed in the free market and race-blindness, because Republicans are the real not-racists. Then they were all waah […]

Iowa congressman Steve King was the star speaker at a “Stop Amnesty” rally in Richmond, Virginia, Monday, and supporters stayed away in droves — the crowd was estimated at between 30 and 60 people, almost none of whom appeared to be valedictorians or drug mules with calves the size of cantaloupes. Despite the disappointing turnout, […]

“Why is Congress full of morons, Eric Cantor? Why does it suck so very very hard, Eric Cantor? Why is attempting to repeal Obamacare your go-to solution for just about every pressing problem facing the American people, Eric Cantor? Aren’t we heading for a major disaster because you guys are too busy playing grabass to […]

We had a good laugh when House GOP leadership put the 2013 Farm Bill up for a vote, certain it would pass, but whoops, it failed instead! In the very embarrassing aftermath, Eric Cantor was like, “It’s the Democrats’ fault that we can’t govern!” because they “promised” 40 votes they didn’t deliver, and Nancy Pelosi […]

Are you guys all sad that Obamacare is dead dead dead? Your precious Kenyan Muslin Messiah has failed you like imaginary President4Life Palin told you he would! How is Bamz fucking up today? By bowing to the pressure of whinging from businesses with 51 or more employees who explained that if they had to give […]

So the House of Representatives has been compared to a bunch of spoiled whiny babies plenty of times, because Tea Party. And there have been a zillion stories written in newspapers, the web logs (“blogs”), and in the lamestream media about how no one can control them, except that Speaker Boehner is doing kinda an […]