Thomas Friedman Assaulted By Rhode Island Pies!
Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008
New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman wrote a decent book many years ago and has since made a living by promoting the Iraq War, going on sabbatical, and coming up with useless concepts like these: “the world is flat,” “a Lexus is like an olive tree, in that both are on my book cover,” and “I used my NYT corporate Amex credit card to buy a trinket from this Pakistani, which I’ll conflate into a hackneyed worldview cliche.” This modern day soothsayer spoke to some kids at Brown University last night about the environment and got pelted with green pies, which is what happens in the Global Marketplace of Ideas. MORE »
Now this is a creative graphic from America’s Magazine of Record, Time, which will grace the cover for its upcoming green issue. (Hey, wasn’t that Vanity Fair’s gimmick-issue to begin with?) Of course it is a play on the famous Iwo Jima photo/statue from World War II, which was a fake to begin with. Naturally, Iwo Jima veterans are very offended that their fake posing photo is being used to promote something as Communist as saving the environment. 
Hey America, you may have been too busy delighting in the fruits of our thousand-year Mesopotamian adventure and rolling around on piles of strong dollars to notice our nation’s crumbling infrastructure. But thanks to 
The liberal communist League of Conservation Voters yesterday gave special-interest lackey John McCain the worst environmental record rating in the entire Congress. This is not surprising. Despite his early support for global warming (fixing it, that is), John McCain is the biggest corporate sell-out since New York City in the Giuliani years. When WALNUTS! isn’t getting his old man dentures flossed by a GE executive vice president, or cheating on his wife with any number of sexy lobbyist whores, he is finding innocent mango trees and chopping them down for bloodsport, while killing Marxist pandas. Then again, he was tortured in the war!! [
The Post has the Energy Task Force list!!!!! We’ve been waiting six years to figure out who, exactly, sat down with Vice President Cheney to draft our nation’s energy policy! The answer: 
Today’s installment in the Post’s “Everything You Knew About Dick Cheney (But Would Be Disappeared For Investigating)” series is all about, well, Christine Todd Whitman. It’s remarkable that a former Republican governor of New Jersey — we’re talking about Christine “Breathe Deep at Ground Zero, Kids, Good Ol’ American Know-How Will Clean the Asbestos Off Your Lungs” Whitman here — comes off looking like a model steward of the environment, but we’re comparing her to Dick Cheney, a man who tries to interpret the Clean Air Act as a call for the government to destroy the moon. 
You can laugh at California laws if you want to — except in Berkeley, where that’s illegal — but environmental legislation in the most-populated state in the union generally makes it to Washington in a decade or so. Meaning, say good-bye to your precious plastic grocery bags that probably fill about 35% of your kitchen cabinets today. 
As we continue honoring the birth of Richard Milhouse Nixon, let’s take a look at his liberal credentials.
Bad news, everyone: Al Gore, whom we like again because he’s not running for anything, is definitely running for something. How do we know? Robot calls: 