Wonkette

So what’s been going on with our greatest Vice President, Richard “Dick” Cheney, since we last spoke? Nothing much, just some new revelations about Cheney bein’ Cheney, hatin’ on the environment and such. In this latest news cycle, we have the tale of that time Cheney’s office once edited out six pages of the CDC director’s testimony to Congress regarding this: “CDC considers climate change a serious public health concern.” Silly egotistical CDC director. She’s obviously one of those people who gets pissed when her editors shake things up a bit — cutting commas, switching grafs, deleting major theses about climate change killing everyone, correcting split infinitives even if they do “sound” better. Any editor has dealt with these twits. We sympathize, Dick. [Washington Post]

Remember how the liberals and environmentalists were freaking out, a few days ago, because the BLM wanted to stop accepting solar-energy applications for federal land in the southwest until maybe the environmental impact of the other 125 projects already submitted could be given the sort of environmental review the environmentalists generally believe is a good thing? Well, never mind. MORE »

Rep. John Hall (Dirty Hippie, NY) became a congressman in 2006, when even a naked “soft rock” hippie seemed less dangerous than Mark Foley or Don Sherwood or John Sweeney. Problem is, hippiez r dum! Hall is now sending official congressional spam about the alleged Bush Administration plot to stop solar energy so the Oil Corporates can continue to rule the Earth. Are American enviro-leftists as gullible as the “God DAMN Muslim O’bama’s Christian Church” crowd? Let’s find out! MORE »

Today John McCain announced his most insanely simplistic campaign idea yet: a science fair contest. He proposed “a $300 million government prize to whoever can develop an automobile battery that far surpasses existing technology.” Screw you people; Wonkette is going to Home Depot to buy sheet metal, rivets, and Legos right now. MORE »

With Hillary Clinton gone and the media finally paying some attention to John McCain’s campaign, WALNUTS! knows that he’ll have to put in a few minutes with his reporter friends to sustain his Maverick image. That’s why he’s making such a grand spectacle of his “independent” thinking on the environment and global warming. John McCain will certainly make Saving Our Planet the trademark issue of his campaign, because he cares about Earth. Yesterday, for example, John McCain cared about Earth a lot. Here is his new ad, in which he cares about Earth yet again. [YouTube]

New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman wrote a decent book many years ago and has since made a living by promoting the Iraq War, going on sabbatical, and coming up with useless concepts like these: “the world is flat,” “a Lexus is like an olive tree, in that both are on my book cover,” and “I used my NYT corporate Amex credit card to buy a trinket from this Pakistani, which I’ll conflate into a hackneyed worldview cliche.” This modern day soothsayer spoke to some kids at Brown University last night about the environment and got pelted with green pies, which is what happens in the Global Marketplace of Ideas. MORE »

Now this is a creative graphic from America’s Magazine of Record, Time, which will grace the cover for its upcoming green issue. (Hey, wasn’t that Vanity Fair’s gimmick-issue to begin with?) Of course it is a play on the famous Iwo Jima photo/statue from World War II, which was a fake to begin with. Naturally, Iwo Jima veterans are very offended that their fake posing photo is being used to promote something as Communist as saving the environment. MORE »

Hey America, you may have been too busy delighting in the fruits of our thousand-year Mesopotamian adventure and rolling around on piles of strong dollars to notice our nation’s crumbling infrastructure. But thanks to Popular Mechanics, you can now find out which massive highway interchange, bridge, dam or waterway near you is about to collapse! And guess which proud metropolitan area earns not one but two spots on this coveted Top Ten list? Shame on you, Barack Obama! MORE »

The liberal communist League of Conservation Voters yesterday gave special-interest lackey John McCain the worst environmental record rating in the entire Congress. This is not surprising. Despite his early support for global warming (fixing it, that is), John McCain is the biggest corporate sell-out since New York City in the Giuliani years. When WALNUTS! isn’t getting his old man dentures flossed by a GE executive vice president, or cheating on his wife with any number of sexy lobbyist whores, he is finding innocent mango trees and chopping them down for bloodsport, while killing Marxist pandas. Then again, he was tortured in the war!! [The Trail]

The Post has the Energy Task Force list!!!!! We’ve been waiting six years to figure out who, exactly, sat down with Vice President Cheney to draft our nation’s energy policy! The answer: the energy industry! MORE »

Today’s installment in the Post’s “Everything You Knew About Dick Cheney (But Would Be Disappeared For Investigating)” series is all about, well, Christine Todd Whitman. It’s remarkable that a former Republican governor of New Jersey — we’re talking about Christine “Breathe Deep at Ground Zero, Kids, Good Ol’ American Know-How Will Clean the Asbestos Off Your Lungs” Whitman here — comes off looking like a model steward of the environment, but we’re comparing her to Dick Cheney, a man who tries to interpret the Clean Air Act as a call for the government to destroy the moon. MORE »

Julie MacDonald, the Interior Department’s Assistant Secretary of Fish, Wildlife and Parks, is in a bit of hot water for, well, the usual cronyism bullshit that every single hack in every single department is guilty of to varying degress. One of the complaints: she was a bit careless with sensitive DoI documents, and, you know, tended to forward a lot of them on to lobbyists and right-wing think tanks. Oh, and random 14-year-old internet nerds. MORE »

You can laugh at California laws if you want to — except in Berkeley, where that’s illegal — but environmental legislation in the most-populated state in the union generally makes it to Washington in a decade or so. Meaning, say good-bye to your precious plastic grocery bags that probably fill about 35% of your kitchen cabinets today. MORE »

As we continue honoring the birth of Richard Milhouse Nixon, let’s take a look at his liberal credentials.

If you only know “Tricky Dick” for his dictatorial presidency that very nearly ended two centuries of American democracy and first elevated amoral criminals such as Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld to the White House, then you’ll surely be surprised by all the stuff we’ve hidden after the jump.

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