Obama gets a gold medal in the prestigious Kindly Requesting The Olympics For Chicago While In Denmark event. [New York Times]
David Letterman slept with some people on his staff and some other lady turned around and performed extortion on him! [New York Times]
Some ex-prosecutor on the Roman Polanski case now admits that he made a bunch of shit up for some documentary about Polanski. [CNN]
Iran has agreed to start outsourcing its uranium to other countries for enriching purposes. (David Letterman’s intern is now extorting Iran.) [WSJ]
GE and Comcast might go halvies on NBC Universal-ownership. Everyone should please check with Tina Fey to make sure this is doable, plotwise, before doing anything. [Reuters]
When the Labor Dept. releases its unemployment report on Friday, America might tie some 1983 unemployment Olympic record. USA! [AP]
Oh hey those FASCISTS at FOX censored SALLY FIELD. We figure she owes them big-time because jesus christ that’s one crazy lady. These awards shows are on a short broadcast delay so that when whatever crazy actor starts screaming “FUCK JESUS” it can be bleeped so poor people won’t lose their faith or whatever — the Flying Nut apparently said “goddamned war.” Anyway, if your MOM RULED THE WORLD it would kind of suck, too. Also, this is apparently from last night. Sally Field’s still alive? Did they finally make “Smokey and the Bandit IV?”
