Wonkette

Throughout the colony of Virginia, thousands of sad “Americans” have gathered to beg Queen Elizabeth II for forgiveness and a chance to rejoin the British Empire. MORE »

Expect Britain to quit being so nice to us all the time — ’cause they’re finally paid up. MORE »

Tony Blankley supports the Danes, hopes they stay in Denmark.

Breathless update! Tony Blankley writes in to set the record straight — unlike those other immigrants, Tony was pronounced A-OK by Uncle Sam!

You correctly cite my opposition to illegal immigration, but chastise me for not then deporting myself back to England–from whence I came. Your error, pardonable though it may be, is to assume I am an illegal immigrant. Otherwise, of course, your entire comment would be demagoguery of the rankest order–which heaven forfend it surely couldn’t be.

We point out only that Mr. Buchanan seeks a much tighter quota even on so-called “legal” immigration, and he surely would warn us of the dangers to our shared Euro-Xtian-Caucasian culture posed by this tea-drinking, chimbley-sweeping, bespoke-suited terror.

Blankley’s full, charming, Katherine Harris-referencing email, after the jump. Read it aloud in your best James Mason impression!

Significantly less breathless update: Eric Pfeiffer writes in to assure us that he is decidedly not an “all-around nice guy.” Don’t you people have a money-losing paper to put out?

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• British Deputy PM calls Bush administration, “crap.” Dick Cheney’s heart warmed by the innocence. [The Independent]

• Sneaky Canadians confuse American governors with their sneaky Canadian jokes. [Boing Boing]
• Willie Nelson makes a non-smokable donation to Cindy Sheehan’s “ranch.” [KCEN-TV]
• Orrin Hatch admits Democrats will take control of Congress, just like their terrorist masters want. [The Carpetbagger Report]
• TSA now targeting people who “looked pissed off,” everyone in the security line at Dulles to be arrested. [NYT]

Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales on Monday ordered a side-by-side review of American and British counterterrorism laws as a first step toward determining whether further changes in American law are warranted.

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• WashPo regurgitates quotes, true or not: “The numbing repetition of uncorrected falsehoods creates a phony atmosphere of uncertainty around key questions which in fact have already been resolved. Eventually voters throw up their hands and accept the fact that they’ll never know for sure what the truth is, and confusion ensues.” [The Horse's Mouth]

• British Knife Amnesty collects 17,715 knives so far. Commenter: “Leave it to the Brits - collecting the blades while missing the point.” [LGF]
• In defense of the knock-and-announce rule. [Lawyers , Guns and Money]
• Bill O’Reilly pities/endorses Lieberman, calls internet “smear machine.” [Crooks and Liars]
• Ladies Loving Ladies: Michelle Malkin video salutes Ann Coulter. Jack Burkman ups offer to $10k. [Hot Air]

“Hey now baby, get into my big black car, I wanna just show you what my politics are…” MORE »

We’re lucky when we hear vague tales of hookers behind closed doors around here. Across the pond, their neo-Fascists star in Marxist gay porn. MORE »

Striking similarities exist between the U.S. and British governments. Consider the following ways in which the Brits are just like us: MORE »

* Ken “Wanna See Me Fit My Whole Foot In My Mouth?” Livingstone made London proud again. Blogger David Bernstein gives him a crash course in Jewish marriage — with a thinly veiled hint that he’s registered at Pottery Barn. [The Volokh Conspiracy]
* The Archbishop of Canterbury doesn’t want the kids learning creationism. Tristero, blogging live from sixteenth-century England, claims the trend-setting Archbishop has “irrevocably recast the [creationism] debate.” [Hullabaloo]
* Josh! Come stai? Come si dice “Run this script by De Niro” in italiano? [Talking Points Memo]
* John Burgess petitions Tiger Beat for a Tony Blair spread. [Outside the Beltway]
* The Amazon is thriving on its own decay. Research dibs on “Orrin Hatch: Biome in Disguise” [Tim Blair]