Gentlemen, did you wake up this morning with a little extra pep in your Mr. Peepers? We sure did, because WE FINALLY GOT OUR PRESIDENT BACK! It’s like that awesome hopey and changey guy from 2008 snuck back out and sucker-punched the GOP right in the nards with like a million awesome words at the […]

JP Morgan is going to have to pay $410 million dollars for manipulating energy markets in California and Michigan between 2010-2012, and if you’re thinking that this sounds an awful lot like what Enron was doing, well, you’re right! It was! Via CNN Money: The bank’s energy unit, JP Morgan Venture Energy Corporation, was accused […]

This post made possible by the Patty Dumpling Endowed Blogging Chair for Oil Spills and Whatnot. Today in “just who in the hell is running this place?” Wonkette presents: Exxon. Ya know, usually our corporate overlords do a swell job with this Potemkin democracy illusion – the country’s farce in Washington with the “Senate” and […]

Good news for the environment or whatever: Americans can no longer afford gasoline, because it costs about eighty dollars to fill up, so they’ve all quit driving cars! With the per-gallon price at $3.76 nationwide — and much higher on the West Coast, gah — some of the people are even sort of considering not […]

The Hill today has a detailed story on a Cornell University report that says natural-gas “fracking,” endorsed by Obama, among others, is pretty terrible for the environment. What? In The Hill? Oh, the coal lobby must have bought a bigger ad in their paper than the natural-gas lobby. “The [greenhouse gas] footprint for shale gas […]

A $2.2 billion “clean coal” plant in West Texas has received approval from the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality, which means Texas is one step closer to harnessing the awesome power of sulfurous pollution rocks like steampunk Zeppelin pilots used to power their phonographs, in 1880. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS “CLEAN” COAL. It’s […]

What does being the only man in America to apologize to BP for this past summer’s oil spill get you? Why, the chairmanship of the House Energy and Commerce Committee, of course! Joe Barton is still somehow the ranking Republican member of that committee, so he will probably get that job, even though his party […]

This morning you took a gasoline shower, ate a coal donut, and went off to work in your Hummer thinking your country was safely ranked #1 in the world. YOU THOUGHT WRONG. It turns out China is now tops when it comes to consuming the world’s energy, which is our most important job as Americans. […]

Hey isn’t he supposed to be plugging the danged hole, America? Each year, at the beginning of shrimp season, Barack Obama blesses the fleet of oil-spill cleanup boats. Why isn’t BP honoring this tradition today? Where are all the windmills! What is he even talking about? At least this isn’t the “last crisis America will […]

Comedy time again, as long as you can laugh at an oil-drenched seabird who can’t get back to its wetlands nesting site to feed its babies, stupid bird! Sarah Palin has a hilarious new Facebook message that will, probably, end up being BP’s actual legal defense, which the Supreme Court will eventually rule in favor […]

Liberal heartthrob Barack Obama had so much fun bombing Muslims over the weekend! There’s hardly anything that drives the libtards nuts like having the robot death planes bomb poor countries and then having somebody at a podium just barely suppressing their drunken laughter as they claim it was “Hitler’s Number Two” or whatever. Oh wait, […]

OIL IS SO TASTY  4:30 pm February 2, 2010

Meh Cap-And-Trade Whatever

by Jim Newell

It’s Barack Obama in New Hampshire! Here he is politely acknowledging that the Senate will probably drop cap-and-trade this year. And sorry, “Starbucks coffee enthusiasts,” but that sounds like a pretty good idea right now.

GORILLA DEFEATS JOE BARTON  8:53 pm June 26, 2009

by Jim Newell

NOW WE WILL ALL DRIVE TREES! Whoa hey they managed to do it, the Democrats did, passing the Waxman-Markey American Clean Energy and SECURITY Act, 219-212 — eight Republicans voting Yea, 44 Democrats voting Naw. This sure is a “big victory” for Barack Obama! Except that it has to go to the Senate now and […]

Opossum-eyed Jesus geologist Joe Barton, Republican Congressman from Texas, signaled his intent last month to stop the liberal Waxman-Markey energy bill — the one with cap-and-trade, which is about hamburgers — with traditional adult methods of opposition: “I’m going to be the sneaky little guy that pops up from behind the bush and fights the […]

Here is an official clip prepared by the office of Texas Rep. Joe Barton titled, “Where Does Oil Come From? Question leaves Energy Secretary puzzled.” This title alone should tell you enough about what really happened.