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Posts Tagged ‘Embarrassments’

LEMMIWINKS?

Georgia Gov. Candidate Produces ‘Citizen Kane’-esque Technical Breakthrough Of Our Time

Friday, October 16th, 2009

A Republican candidate for Georgia governor in 2010, John Oxendine, e-mailed political reporters about some epic YouPorn thing he had just shot, one that would destroy the Democratic candidate, former governor Roy Barnes, politically: “A campaign spokesman said the ad ‘demonstrates John Oxendine’s commitment to using innovative, cutting-edge genre to communicate serious messages in creative mediums.” He would reveal this monumental achievement at an event later Thursday night, according to the press release, “at an undisclosed laser-tag facility … closed to the public. After viewing the commercial, the volunteers will enjoy pizza and laser-tag.” Oh, we’re so making you click the clicky for this one… MORE »


SOMEONE HAS TO!

Some Republican Is Yelling About Larry The Cable Guy, In Congress

Friday, July 31st, 2009

Whatever this is, it sure looks educational. Write your own context! Or just read what our Hill operative sent us, which still does not truly explain why this nut is ranting about AIG bonuses next to a picture that racist slob from teevee. MORE »


EMBARRASSMENTS

CNN’s Ed Henry Writes Worst Article In American History

Wednesday, March 25th, 2009

Earlier today we mentioned CNN White House correspondent Ed Henry’s performance at the press conference last night, and how he and his fellow busybodies were rapidly spinning and spinning and spinning to make it appear as though he didn’t look like a goober when Obama called him a twat. In the latest effort, Henry has written an exclusive article for CNN.com called, “What really happened with Obama.” It is approximately 5,000 words and includes sports metaphors, heavy doses of edge-of-your-seat drama, tricks o’ the trade, and maybe a little bit of SELF-SATISFACTION. To reiterate our headline, it is the worst article in American history, at least since yesterday when K-Lo wrote something funny about Notre Dame and abortions. MORE »


ANN COULTER

Wednesday, February 20th, 2008

Benson & Hedges 100s, a gallon of Rocky Road, and a carton of DulcolaxIMPOVERISHED ANN COULTER SHOPS AT PUBLIX WITH BAD CREDIT CARD: Skeletal hobo queen and occasional conservative commentator Ann Coulter embarrassed herself in a Palm Beach supermarket this weekend when her credit card was declined. An observer reported, “She just paid with cash and ran out of there. But at least she’s eating.” [Page Six] MORE »


GALE NORTON

Lakota Will Be Way Way Better Than Dakota

Thursday, December 20th, 2007

eagle.jpgWell, the Lakota Indians have fucking had it. The people that brought us such leaders as Sitting Bull and Crazy Horse announced today that they are withdrawing from their treaties with the US of A and are becoming an independent nation on account of all 33 of those treaties being totally ignored by the government they signed them with 150 years ago. Maybe it has something to do with the decades-worth of royalties on the oil extracted from their land the Dept. of the Interior refuses pay them. Just a wild guess. MORE »