election
Ann And Mitt Romney Adjust To Sad Lonely Life Of Regular Old Centi-Millionaires
Mitt Romney is SO VERY SAD, you guys. All he wanted was to be President. That’s it. He had a dream, just a simple dream, and You People crushed it. So now he spends his days alone, shuffling around in his $1000 bathrobes, talking to secret service personnel that aren’t there. And Ann! This has [...]
Tea Party Learns Its Painful Electoral Lesson: That Mitt Romney Was Too Moderate
It is so much fun to watch the Party of Personal Responsibility point fingers and self-implode, isn’t it? It certainly is! Today’s finger-pointing blame-game session comes courtesy the Tea Party, which has engaged in about a week of sober reflection and concluded that the GOP lost because Mitt was too moderate. No, really: Tea party [...]
Rick Santorum Will Gladly Compromise With Democrats To Ruin Social Security For You
Oh finally, Rick Santorum has written a column on the Hill, weighing in on the election and What It Means! And What It Means is that the GOP will FINALLY, after all this time, cooperate with President Obama on cutting Social Security and privatizing Medicare. So the fact that Americans went to the polls and [...]
Bill O’Reilly: GOP Would Have Gotten Away With It Too If It Weren’t For These Hispanic Moochers Who Want Handouts
Would you like Bill O’Reilly’s advice on what the Republican party could have done differently to avoid losing the Presidency and their chances of a GOP Senate? Of course you would, and here it is! First off, says Bill O’Reilly, the campaign really just reined Mitt Romney in too much. He should have been allowed [...]
Oh How Cute, Fox is Suddenly Worried About “Media Bias” and its Impact on Democracy
Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.com Apparently there are “new questions” about the role of the media 2012 race! What kind of questions? Well, the kind Fox Nooz asks, like: why does the media insist on pointing out all the lies that come out of Mitt Romney’s mouth? And: why do they have to call [...]
Do Not Mess With This D.C. Lady’s Signs, She Will Wreck You
Just so you know, D.C. Advisory Neighborhood Commission candidate Grace Daughtridge is NOT MESSING AROUND. Not only has she “reestablished” the 11th-largest tree in the District, but she was at a polling place today, and saw a dude futzing with one of her campaign signs, and, if the allegedlies have it right, she took that [...]
Totally Innocent, Not At All Terrible Republican Poll-Watchers Getting Booted In Philly
Chaos in Philadelphia! CHAOS! They are ejecting GOP poll-watchers left and right, for no reason! Twitchy tells us all about it, in a style quite fitting to the website’s name. “Are the dirty tricks starting already?” they wonder, before the breathless, context-free revelation of “GOP poll inspector physically assaulted,” which definitely happened the way it [...]
Pennsylvania Reports Voter Intimidation From … REPUBLICANS?!?
So you know that huge terrifying black man we told you about, who is harassing old white ladies by opening the door for them? That’s called “voter intimidation,” and it’s practiced by minorities and the United Nations and tricky Democrats, because they don’t want to play by the rules, they can’t help it, they’re just [...]
Rush Limbaugh Thinks Chris Christie Is A Big Fat Fool
Oh ha ha ha, this is delightful! Two days ago, Chris Christie basically told Romney to go eat a dick because he wasn’t interested in prancing around with Mittens, looking for photo ops, while half of New Jersey’s coastline was still underwater. So today, Rush Limbaugh has decreed that Chris Christie is “fat” and a [...]
Mitt Romney Iz In Ur Hurricane, Privatizin Ur FEMA
Hello to all of you in the Eastern third of this great country, currently hoarding boxes of wine and tarp and more boxes of wine in order to hopefully get through Frankenstorm without killing your loved ones in a fit of cabin fever. How is that going for you, gathering all those supplies and whatnot? [...]
‘Joe’ the ‘Plumber’ Has No Time For ‘Debates’
Remember Joe the Plumber, that guy who isn’t really named Joe and isn’t really a plumber but nonetheless became famous for no particular reason during the 2008 election and then somehow managed to get a reporting gig for Pajamas Media and subsequently “wrote” a “book” that now sells for about $00.01 on Amazon? Yes, THAT “Joe” the [...]
Mitt Romney Isn’t Telling Us Exactly How He Will Ruin The Housing Sector
Good news, everyone! Romney/Ryan have no specific plans to ruin the housing sector at this point, which is probably a good thing, given that Mitt Romney has been pretty clear about his interest in ruining education and Paul Ryan has a very specific plan to ruin Medicare and Medicaid. So let’s just all respectfully disagree [...]
Gentleman Mitt Romney To Uppity Teacher: ‘I Didn’t Ask You a Question’
Here is a video from a nice lady who attended a Romney roundtable all interested and optimistic about the whole thing until Romney asked, “Which one of you is the teacher?” and being a teacher, this nice lady raised her hand. Then Romney began lecturing her about teachers unions and how we need to privatize [...]
Not At All Racist or Sexist National Review Staff Tells You Why Not to Vote For The President
We need to get that uppity negro out of the White House because he only signs the back of checks instead of the front of them, but we are not racist! (says the National Review Online Staff). And also! The people who point out that we’re racist — THOSE are the real racists, OF COURSE. [...]
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