Egypt
Jon Kyl To U.S. Embassy: Stop Raping Yourself
Senator Jon Kyl (R-Arkham Asylum) had a very insightful analysis of the U.S. Embassy’s statement condemning religious bigotry. In a stunning combination of cluelessness, partisanship, and a basic misunderstanding of analogy, Kyl told a group of reporters It’s like the judge telling the woman who got raped, ‘You asked for it because of the way [...]
This Episode Of Aaron Sorkin’s Newsroom Will Rank With The M*A*S*H* Finale, We Are Sure
Turn on the Benny Hill music! Our noble newscast is bumbling and flailing like it is not the greatest newscast in the history of Edward R. Murrow! Everything is going wrong! Their dude in Egypt — the Rachel Maddow/Stephen Colbert whom Keith Olbermann/Jon Stewart has helped to get his or her own newscast following KO/JS’s [...]
Egypt Bringing New Meaning To Term ‘Cold Fish’ (UPDATED!)
The mysterious land of Egypt has always been known for three things: Pyramids, the Sphinx and sex with dead people. Now husbands who have been married for years with the same wife may be able to enjoy a continuing fruitful sex life post mortem (but, sadly, the ‘screw by’ date expires six hours after death). [...]
Richest 1% Should Prepare For U.S. Revolution, Says … Vanity Fair
Warnings of impending class revolt in America are showing up in the weirdest places these days — like Vanity Fair magazine, which just published this terse summary of the situation by Joseph E. Stiglitz. And Stiglitz isn’t talking about, say, the “Ron Paul Revolution,” where some deluded people send money to a wealthy libertarian congressman [...]
Egyptian Names Kid ‘Facebook’ To Honor Jan. 25 Revolution, So Go Ahead & Name Your Kid ‘Farmville’
Have you been enjoying a vicarious revolutionary buzz because you also look at the Facebook website sometimes? Well then you will be very pleased to know that an Egyptian guy named his newborn daughter “Facebook” — we’re guessing the mother wasn’t consulted? — because the website Facebook was one of the methods of communication used [...]
Glenn Beck: Wisconsin Unions Want a UN Caliphate, Or Something
OMG, you guys, Glenn Beck loves the nation-state so much. It is his favorite kind of world order. But according to his latest airtight theory, the United Nations, Wisconsin protestors, and Muslim Brotherhood are all in communication with each other about overthrowing the nature of international governance by making a single, Marxist, Islamist world government [...]
Beck Didn’t Like It When Abraham Lincoln Supported Google Either
WE KNEW IT! That Google thought it could win over our trust by keeping secret about our favorite porn and about our weird health fears, but now it’s gone too far: It’s single-handedly taken down Glenn Beck’s best bro, Hosni Mubarak. Look, this isn’t a political thing. Glenn Beck didn’t like it when Bing gave [...]
Violent Sexual Assault Poorly Categorized
There are whoops and there are whoops. So is this entertainment show going to be paired with Two and a Half Men? That seems like a good fit. [screenshot courtesy Wonkette operative "Laura M."]
CBS Reporter Suffers Sexual Assault In Egypt; Internet Ruins Life of Guy
CBS News correspondent Lara Logan is recovering in a hospital after becoming the victim of an unspeakable act of mob violence in Egypt, a “brutal and sustained sexual assault and beating before being saved by a group of women and an estimated 20 Egyptian soldiers,” according to a CBS release. The Internet, which is good [...]
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