Tag: education

OK, fine, ad IS from 1994...

ITT Tech Closing Nationwide, Leaving Students To Mercy Of Better, Less Expensive Community Colleges

ITT Tech, that staple of late night career advertising, is going belly-up. About damn time.

Morning Joe Loses Control Without Scarborough to Mansplain Donald Trump For America

Mike Brzezinski is mad as hell, and she's not going to take it anymore!

God Expresses Displeasure With DNC By Drenching Philly With Completely Unreasonable Monsoon

But then we ate some fancy food and beer and watched Michelle Obama slay, so everything is OK now.

Texas Supreme Court Permits Homeschooling Parents To Continue Being Sh*theads

Last year, we wondered at you just how stupid you were legally permitted to be in Texas; now, thanks to the nine (all-Republican!) unelected (?) judges in robe on the Texas Supreme Court, we know the answer: We are...

Fox Doc Keith Ablow Being A Jerk To All The Lazy, Potted-Up Millennials. That Is Wonkette’s Job!

Snotnosed Millennial brat thinks "Dr." Keith Ablow is not even the boss of him, whatever.

Trump And Gingrich Totally Understand Women, Just Like Beloved Monarch Henry VIII

No one understood women like Henry VIII, that is for sure. Except maybe Ted Bundy!

Canada To Send All Its Anti-Vaccine Idiots To Re-Education Camps. Bye Anti-Vaxxers, Byeeeee!

First lesson: Jenny McCarthy is not an actual scientist.
My Little Pony: Friendship is a Plot to Take Away Our Liberty

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Watch Fox And Free Yourself From Propaganda

Funny how the Deleted Comments biz goes. A couple weeks back, we had so few real winners that we had to forego the feature altogether; this week, we'll have to select carefully from a veritable smorgasbord of Derp. So...
12. Years. Old.

Tamir Rice’s Family Gets $6 Million Settlement, Not Their Kid Back

The city of Cleveland has settled a wrongful death lawsuit in the police shooting of 12-year-old Tamir Rice for $6 million, so everything is OK now we guess. Tamir was shot dead by officer Timothy Loehmann in November 2014,...
Everybody wants prosthetic foreheads on their real heads

Bill O’Reilly Doubles Down On All Those Blacks With Their Tattooed Foreheads

Here is an important thing about Bill O'Reilly: He is never wrong. Oh, sure, he may get some facts a little bit off, like bragging about Inside Edition having won a Peabody award when it actually won a Polk...

Bill O’Reilly Doubts Even Donald Trump Can Find Jobs For Dumb Tattooed Blacks

Who says conservative media outlets never ask Donald Trump the tough questions? On Fox's The O'Reilly Factor Monday night, host Bill O'Reilly interrupted Donald Trump's fantasy about solving all of America's race issues by "bringing jobs back from China"...
HISTORY FACT.

Idaho Lawmaker Will Make Sure Kids Learn Science Directly From King James Bible

You know how stupid liberal science textbooks are. They're all, "Once upon a time there was nothing, but then the universe banged itself real hard, and then a bunch of atoms shot out and landed on earth and turned into...
The crazy candidate lady Mary Lou is on the left, next to Ted Cruz's insane father.

Texas School Board Candidate Can’t Wait To Teach Kids About Obama’s Gay Whoring Days

Time for a dispatch from Texas, where the book larnin' happens. The Texas Freedom Network, which does the yeoman's work of trying to keep actual education in Texas schools, would like to introduce us to Mary Lou Bruner of Mineola,...
Guys, shut up, we know this did not happen in the Dead Poets Society movie film.

Looks Like Things Got Pretty Rapey At Tucker Carlson’s Nice Christian Prep School

Hey Wonkerinos, sorry to be bringing you all these stories about rape and sexual abuse on an otherwise pleasant Thursday, but here's a thing: Rhode Island State Police are investigating allegations of sexual abuse of more than two dozen students...
Fa la la la la, la la la SHART

‘Fox & Friends’ Jizz Their Stockings In Yuletide Rage

Two of the unique strains of brain syphilis that sit on the "Fox & Friends" couch every morning have finded a real War On Christmas! Oh so exciting! You see, there is this school in Brooklyn, P.S. 169, and...
The fuck is the man in front of me saying?

Michigan Republican Sad He Can’t Fix The Blacks, Stop Calling Him Racist

Here is a nice state senator Wonket has never met before! His name is Marty Knollenberg (R-Surprise!), he's a Virgo, he likes long walks on Lake Michigan (probably), and he's real sad about how he can't unblack The Blacks. Here...