Tag: education

Fox Doc Keith Ablow Being A Jerk To All The Lazy, Potted-Up Millennials. That Is Wonkette’s Job!

Snotnosed Millennial brat thinks "Dr." Keith Ablow is not even the boss of him, whatever.

Trump And Gingrich Totally Understand Women, Just Like Beloved Monarch Henry VIII

No one understood women like Henry VIII, that is for sure. Except maybe Ted Bundy!

Canada To Send All Its Anti-Vaccine Idiots To Re-Education Camps. Bye Anti-Vaxxers, Byeeeee!

First lesson: Jenny McCarthy is not an actual scientist.
My Little Pony: Friendship is a Plot to Take Away Our Liberty

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Watch Fox And Free Yourself From Propaganda

Funny how the Deleted Comments biz goes. A couple weeks back, we had so few real winners that we had to forego the feature altogether; this week, we'll have to select carefully from a veritable smorgasbord of Derp. So...
12. Years. Old.

Tamir Rice’s Family Gets $6 Million Settlement, Not Their Kid Back

The city of Cleveland has settled a wrongful death lawsuit in the police shooting of 12-year-old Tamir Rice for $6 million, so everything is OK now we guess. Tamir was shot dead by officer Timothy Loehmann in November 2014,...
Everybody wants prosthetic foreheads on their real heads

Bill O’Reilly Doubles Down On All Those Blacks With Their Tattooed Foreheads

Here is an important thing about Bill O'Reilly: He is never wrong. Oh, sure, he may get some facts a little bit off, like bragging about Inside Edition having won a Peabody award when it actually won a Polk...

Bill O’Reilly Doubts Even Donald Trump Can Find Jobs For Dumb Tattooed Blacks

Who says conservative media outlets never ask Donald Trump the tough questions? On Fox's The O'Reilly Factor Monday night, host Bill O'Reilly interrupted Donald Trump's fantasy about solving all of America's race issues by "bringing jobs back from China"...
HISTORY FACT.

Idaho Lawmaker Will Make Sure Kids Learn Science Directly From King James Bible

You know how stupid liberal science textbooks are. They're all, "Once upon a time there was nothing, but then the universe banged itself real hard, and then a bunch of atoms shot out and landed on earth and turned into...
The crazy candidate lady Mary Lou is on the left, next to Ted Cruz's insane father.

Texas School Board Candidate Can’t Wait To Teach Kids About Obama’s Gay Whoring Days

Time for a dispatch from Texas, where the book larnin' happens. The Texas Freedom Network, which does the yeoman's work of trying to keep actual education in Texas schools, would like to introduce us to Mary Lou Bruner of Mineola,...
Guys, shut up, we know this did not happen in the Dead Poets Society movie film.

Looks Like Things Got Pretty Rapey At Tucker Carlson’s Nice Christian Prep School

Hey Wonkerinos, sorry to be bringing you all these stories about rape and sexual abuse on an otherwise pleasant Thursday, but here's a thing: Rhode Island State Police are investigating allegations of sexual abuse of more than two dozen students...
Fa la la la la, la la la SHART

‘Fox & Friends’ Jizz Their Stockings In Yuletide Rage

Two of the unique strains of brain syphilis that sit on the "Fox & Friends" couch every morning have finded a real War On Christmas! Oh so exciting! You see, there is this school in Brooklyn, P.S. 169, and...
The fuck is the man in front of me saying?

Michigan Republican Sad He Can’t Fix The Blacks, Stop Calling Him Racist

Here is a nice state senator Wonket has never met before! His name is Marty Knollenberg (R-Surprise!), he's a Virgo, he likes long walks on Lake Michigan (probably), and he's real sad about how he can't unblack The Blacks. Here...
PEW! PEW! PEW!

The Snake Oil Bulletin: Deep In The Heart Of Stupid

Greetings, pardners, and welcome once again to the Snake Oil Bulletin. We've got us a rootin', tootin', hole-in-head-shootin' round of stories on the agenda this week, all taking place in that great throbbing, barbecue-thrombosed heart of America, Texas! Yeehaw!...
You see, when I was undercover in the Falklands...

Bill O’Reilly: If Mexicans Don’t Like Stereotypes, Get That Mariachi Band Away From Me

Bill O'Reilly and Charles Krauthammer had a fine Old White Guys discussion of rampant Political Correctness on college campuses the other day, concluding with O'Reilly's astute analysis of why Mexispanican people have no cause to complain about being portrayed...
The faculty of the Philosophy Department at the University of Woolamaloo were sorely disappointed by the debate

Republicans Will Save America By Outlawing Liberal Philosophers

Marco Rubio got one of the strangest applause lines of Tuesday's GOP debate when he explained that our institutions of higher learning are wasting too much time teaching frou-frou topics like philosophy that Real Americans simply don't care about....
Check THIS out, kids!

Cure Your Crotch Weasels The Christian Way: Put A Ring On It!

There comes a time in every Christian youngster's life when he or she has a burning case of the crotch weasels and doesn't know what to do. Go to the doctor? Meh, that's for liberals. Go to church? Now you're...