Thanks to the Young Turks for making the video that will heal America: a retrospective of our dearly departed Republican candidates. God, these guys were fun. Fortunately, Mike Huckabee and Mitt Romney will probably run again in four or eight years, and those candidacies will probably launch in a few months. In the meantime, vote in our poll for which monster you miss the most. MORE »

Presidential candidate for the Republicans Rep. Duncan Hunter has exited the race. We’ll miss his constant terrorist chatter about 864-mile walls he would build and Chinese people cheating at life. Hey, Duncan, yeah you, please, one second of your time, just hear us out: Haha bye. [CNN]

News: Duncan Hunter’s internets got hacked. Bigger news: Duncan Hunter is a Republican candidate for president. Biggest news: Duncan Hunter is tied with Rudy Giuliani in delegates. [Duncan Hunter]

• “Aren’t there enough pro-abortion, anti-gun, open borders candidates running for president?” [Michelle Malkin]
• It took seven days to come up with this list? Really? [Right Wing News]
• Nobody likes a crybaby. [Fresh Intelligence]
• Hillary’s Obama takedown plan should work like a charm, since he’s so unpopular and everything. [MoJo]
• Your move, knucklehead. [TVNewswer]
• If only the first two primaries matter, can we just skip to the end of this already? [The Swamp]

Duncan “Fences” Hunter — who actually has campaign signs in this state (right?) — just decided to interrupt everyone else’s schedule and hold a press conference in the next room. He said — BREAKING — he will not resign in his bid for the president and/or 30 seconds of television time. Well here’s a free advertisement of your butt, princess.

Somebody hacked Duncan Hunter’s campaign website, apparently. [ABC News]

To be president, as we learned in high school civics classes, you must be tall and rich. But to run for president, you must only be wealthy — which explains, say, the candidacies of Tom Tancredo and Dennis Kucinich. MORE »

Maverick rebel maybe-candidate Chuck Hagel finally snapped last night and hacked Duncan Hunter’s website, which now promotes … Chuck Hagel. Sort of. MORE »

* Gonzo makes it through almost three minutes of questions from the press today. [The Swamp]
* John McCain still proud of McCain-Feingold, can’t remember back any further. [Captain's Quarters]
* National ballistic missile defense made out of sugar cubes. [C&L]
* Al Qaeda’s intellectual property is safe with Google. [Jawa Report]
* Duncan Hunter has someone write a blawg post for him. [Blogs for Bush]
* Jim Webb “was BORN FIGHTING and will CHOKE A BITCH if need be.” [DCeiver]

An emailer claims to have caught Duncan Hunter’s son Duncan Hunter pretending to be his congressman dad this last weekend. Though we’re pretty sure that’s not against the law — the district voted for Duncan Hunter, not necessarily that Duncan Hunter, right?

Presidential candidate and former HASC chair, Duncan Hunter, was outside his office Friday practicing his golf swing at some length….while his son (also named Duncan Hunter) sat in on meetings in his Dads office — inc meetings with VERY high ranking military officers.

There’s a hilarious story in here about the time our uncle Dick accidentally deposed the prince of Cambodia during a White House tour mistaken identity switcharoo in the ’70s, but it’s a bit long to get in to here.

More speculation, including claims of presidential campaign impropriety (horror of horrors!), after the jump, as always.

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White House Rasputin Karl Rove again endeared the administration to anti-immigration Republicans yesterday with this defense of Bush’s open-border policy: “I don’t want my 17-year-old son to have to pick tomatoes or make beds in Las Vegas.” MORE »